


The Final Sith

by kkyoin



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Jedi: Fallen Order (Video Game)
Genre: Character Development, F/M, The Dark Side of the Force (Star Wars), The Force, The Light Side of the Force (Star Wars), The Neutral Side of the Force (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:00:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 52,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28025895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kkyoin/pseuds/kkyoin
Summary: The year is 30ABY.The First Order led by Snoke has taken over the Galaxy.The old Sith Order has collapsed, but from its ashes rose a new cult of the Descendants of the Black Star, with one and only purpose - to serve as Snoke's assassins.Havre, the third sister of the Descendants has a power she has kept secret for all of her life. One day she decides to take her life into her own hands and risk it all to be free. As she manages to escape the cult, she falls right into the hands of Supreme Leader Snoke who makes an offer she can't refuse.______________This is a story of my original character, first, my intention was to create simple enemies to lovers kind of scenario with Kylo Ren, but it turned out to be so much more than that.This story explores the concept of a Neutral Force user, The difference between the Light and the Dark Side, as well as deep character development.If you like deep characters, plot twists, and a whole lot of romance you're up for a fun ride.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 20
Kudos: 15





	1. The Escape

# 

# The escape

* * *

The day never quite dawned on Mustafar. Toxic dust from the volcanoes on its northern hemisphere formed a veil around the planet that no nearby star could penetrate. For many years, Havre’s world has been just a combination of shapes formed by a shadow blacker than the intergalactic void and red light emitted from a living magma river flowing underneath the base. Every day, since she turned thirteen, she woke up and went to sleep under the artificial light of quartz lamps, which she could not look at for too long without it causing a pulsating headache. But she got used to it, just like she did to so many things before.

Her whole life has been about adapting to new painful habits. Firstly, the pain of isolation in the Temple in the humid climate of Korriban, followed by the pain of the Sith rituals and teachings. Then the pain of her muscles during ten long years of training, and finally the pain of the Descendant’s branding burned onto her skin. It was the thing to wake her up that night, although maybe she hadn’t been sleeping at all. She sat on the bed and instinctively grabbed her wrist on which the branding was carved. She quickly moved her fingers away, clenching her teeth in pain. She looked at her hand, surprised to discover that the sign, red-hot, burned the tips of her fingers. It was like _it_ knew what she was about to do.

She jumped off the bed that was hung above the ground, drowning out the sound of her feet hitting the metal floor. She approached the recess where she held her lightsaber and when her hand touched its cold surface, a wave of peace passed through her. For the first time in so many years, she could close her mind off completely, knowing she wouldn’t be forced to let anyone else read it ever again. This feeling, of almost grasping her long-desired freedom, was exhilarating. But she couldn’t get distracted, there was no time for excitement just yet. Everything could still fail. 

She attached her lightsaber to a leather belt strapped around her thigh and threw a black cloak on her shoulders. It was time for her to go. She knew she had to be in the training room before the First Brother. 

‘Vanity…’ she muttered to herself as a reminder. ‘First vanity, then pride.’

She walked through a cold, metal corridor, turned right, and entered the training chamber. It was still empty and all of their equipment laid in order against the walls. She sat down, legs crossed, in one of the red circles painted on the ground that marked the battle positions. She closed her eyes, entering her mind, where, like always, the force was waiting for her to be used. Havre knew it wouldn’t take long before she could sense the first Brother’s mind, always boiling with uncontrolled emotions from the very minute he would wake up. 

And just like she predicted, about five minutes later she could clearly feel a strong pull on the steady rope, that the force resembled in her head. Pure vanity. Havre smiled impulsively with disdain. He was drowning in it. _‘So, there is no hope for him anyway’_ she thought to herself. _‘He never had any control over himself.’_

‘What are you doing here?’ She heard a familiar strong voice before her. ‘You never come here this early.’

She opened her eyes and stood up, unfocusing her mind on the force. 

‘I was waiting for you.’ She said ‘To see just how much you sweat to achieve your pathetic skills.’

Just a few seconds went by in silence in which she, out of pure curiosity, reached into her head again to see just how much she managed to enrage him. The results were above her expectations. 

The Brother’s face fell. 

‘How dare you?!’ He hissed, frowning. 

‘Scared?’ She drawled, knowing exactly that it would take just this one simple word to get him to let down his guard. The Brother slowly reached his inner pocket and drew his lightsaber. She did the same thing. ‘Are you trying to get yourself killed, Brother?’ She asked and smirked. 

‘Enough talking. If you want to fight me, then just do it.’ He muttered and jumped up to her, clashing his saber against hers, with a loud crackling sound. Havre jumped back and instantly blocked his second strike. He backed away for a second to prepare for a stronger attack but Havre was already one step ahead. Before he even had a chance to thrust, she deflected and his laser blade hit the metal floor. A confused look skimmed over his face. But he didn’t have a chance to wonder how the younger Sister predicted his attack. Their sabers clashed again and this time Havre didn’t back off. They remained in this position for a strong second, both of them pressing hard on the other's laser beam. 

The Brother let out a short grunt, when their sabers slowly turned aside, as both of them refused to back away. And just when it seemed that he was prevailing, Havre quickly snapped off. Her saber cut the air with a swish and thrust rapidly into his leg. The Brother howled in pain and dropped down onto his hands. Havre took advantage of his fall and quickly pulled his sword towards her, using the force. 

‘You can’t… do that!’ He struggled to get his words out, as he tried to stand up. Havre felt his enragement, his frustration. She walked up to him with two sabers in her hands. She breathed in the irritating smell of burned flesh from his wound and watched his eyes filled with anger and fear, reflect the red light coming from the sabers. 

‘Scum.’ She muttered and before he could let out a single word, sunk both weapons into his back. 

Instantly she felt something very strange. A shift in the force, she never experienced before. It felt like a strong grasp on the force she got used to, suddenly loosened and let go. An unfamiliar emotion skimmed through her insides. But it was too slight for her to unravel just yet. 

The next thirty minutes happened so quickly, they became a blur. In one moment, she saw two of of her sisters running through the blast door, and the next she knew, She stood there, panting, with five bodies of The Descendants piled up between her feet. None of them escaped. None of them prevailed. One by one, they all fell into her traps, so predictable… so flawed.

She turned off her lightsaber and put on the strap around her thigh. She looked at the one she had taken from the first Brother and after a brief hesitation, she fasted it next to her own weapon. She left the training room with dispatch and directed her steps to the airstrip located outside the south wing of the base. The distance was short, but at that moment felt strangely long. Sweat ran down her forehead as she felt exhausted from the fight. Her feet carried her almost instinctively, eyesight slipping one last time through the familiar walls. Suddenly she became aware of a strong force shift. ‘He must have found the others’ she thought and quickened her pace. She had to unlock the safety belt from the starship before _he_ would reach the airstrip, otherwise, she wouldn’t have a chance to escape in case something went wrong. She quickly grabbed one of the safety helmets that hung by the exit and pulled it on her head. They were to protect from toxins secreted from nearby volcanoes. The built-in glass that covered her eyes gave the world around her a strange, yellowish tint. When she stepped outside, a strong unpleasant wave of heat, coming from the lava flowing thousands of meters underneath her feet, hit her body. The large starship was docked in the middle of the airstrip and Havre quickly ran up to it. The safety belt was attached right next to the automatic trapdoor and usually needed a passcode to be activated and unlocked. But Havre neither knew the passcode nor had any time to guess what it was. She pulled out her lightsaber and started cutting the safety belt in half.

‘HAVRE!’ she heard and rapidly jumped up. She realized she should have been paying more attention to _his_ trail of force but was too focused on her escape plan. And then, right as he entered the airstrip, Havre knew she had lost her upper hand. She had to improvise. She pulled out both of her lightsabers and turned around to face the master she no longer served. His long cloak was brushed up by a hot wind blowing from beneath his feet, unveiling his double-bladed red lightsaber.

‘Kadmûr.’

‘What are you trying to prove?!’ He yelled. The safety helmet distorted his voice to a nearly droidic sound. Havre felt him trying to enter her mind and with proper satisfaction watched him fail. ‘What are you?!’ He yelled and Havre felt a hint of fear in his strong voice. 

‘Come and find out.’ She muttered and headed towards him, as he stood strong, ready to repel her attack. She had to be quick, focused, and fatal, very much aware that the fight wasn’t going to be easy. He wasn’t just another Descendant. Compared to their Master, her previous opponents were just a couple of untrained Initiates. 

Their lightsabers clashed with an aggressive crackling sound, but this time her foe spent no time pushing against her blade. He quickly twisted the other end of his saber and Havre barely dodged the hit. He was relentless and precise with his strikes, so she had little to no time to predict his next move. Her thoughts were rushing through her mind, too fast to read off. Havre’s greatest strength was failing her. All that was clear to her was his rage overflowing his instincts as his blows became stronger. It forced Havre to step back, as she struggled to ward off his attacks, walking closer and closer to the rim of the platform. 

‘You thought you could just get out of here like that, traitor?!’ He yelled and pushed her back with the force. She was thrown in the air and fell backwards, painfully hitting her spine against the metal bars of the airstrip. The Sith Master approached her slowly and she managed to roll away in the last second before his lightsaber penetrated the ground where her head had laid. 

She pulled herself up and quickly blocked his next strike. He forced against her lightsaber with all his strength, slowly pushing her to the edge. 

‘Why?! Why did you do it?!’ He yelled ‘You think you can kill your way to Snoke?!’ Their helmets were now inches apart and she could see his narrowed eyes, full of bloodlust. She didn’t respond. Her teeth were clenched from pain in her arms while she tried to press against his saber. ‘You are nothing compared to me, you filthy brat!’

At that moment he leaned forward and Havre saw the boiling river of lava reflecting in his helmet. She pushed harder, straining all muscles in her body. If she would let go even the slightest bit, he would throw her into the abyss. 

‘Beg for your life!’ He yelled; his words were drowning in the crackling of his double saber. She felt the lower end of his weapon slowly melting the fabric off her robes on one of her legs. She was running out of time. ‘I made you…!’ he muttered ‘How dare you now turn against me?!’

And in these words, she suddenly saw a glimpse of a chance. ‘ _Could it be that he feels attached to his apprentice...?_ ’a thought skimmed through her mind. She looked into his eyes behind the yellow glass. 

‘I thought you would be proud of me…’ She said slowly and instantly sensed a glimpse of hesitation skim through him. ‘I thought this was something all masters want to see…’ She spanned and slowly reached between his legs with her right foot, resting her balance on the other one. ‘You never noticed how the others wasted your time, master…’ She continued her lies to buy herself more time, waiting for any chance she might get to escape his grasp. ‘You made me realize my power… a power that none of them had…’ at that moment, she had his attention. His eyes widened and Havre heard a rapid, wheezing voice: 

‘What power…?’ He loosened his grip and slowly pulled away. He made his last, fatal mistake. Havre reacted immediately. She pushed him back and in the same motion tripped him with her right foot. As he tried to rapidly grab her coat his lightsaber burned into her arm. She screamed in pain but managed to turn around and push him away. 

For a second her master tumbled on the edge of the platform, trying to grab something to hold on to. But it was too late. Havre jumped back, shut her eyes, and reached out her hand pushing him away with the force. She heard a distorted cry of terror, slowly fading away, and then a distant sizzling sound. She hesitated for a couple of seconds and then carefully walked up to the rim of the metal platform and looked down. But all she saw was just a trace of her Master’s black cloaks slowly burning in red-hot magma. 

Havre turned around and limped towards the starship. She switched the lock on the trap door, and slid inside, quickly shutting the hatch behind her to prevent the toxins from getting inside. Triggered by her motion, the dark insides of the ship were illuminated by thousands of LED strips.

A loud buzzing sound suddenly pulled Havre back into reality. Right as she struggled to open her eyes, she felt three very vivid sensations. Firstly, a shrill pain in her right leg and arm, secondly, a thudding in her skull, and lastly a cold surface pressed against her cheek. Based on that, memories began to form in her hazy mind. A fight…A murder…An escape. She raised her eyelids and realized she was laying on the metallic floor panel of the spaceship, and her mind suddenly became clear again. She realized she must’ve passed out and slowly attempted to pick herself up. The pain from her wounds radiated through her limbs and she barely managed to sit up. She knew that if she hadn’t moved to a medical aid chamber in time, she would risk losing her injured limbs, as the infection from the toxins outside of the spaceship causticized her epidermis. She grabbed her cloak with her intact arm and rolled up the edge to form a gag. She put it between her teeth and grit them on the fabric. Then, she pulled out her hand as if she was trying to reach the wall, and using the force slowly brought herself closer to it, sliding on the floor. When her hand touched the cold surface of the metallic panel, she let herself rest for a couple of seconds, before grabbing a protruding handle and pulling herself up with one swift movement. The makeshift gag drowned out her shrill scream as she felt a wave of unbearable pain in her infected wounds. But she proceeded to move further. Sweat ran down her face when she tried to keep her balance while dragging her disabled leg on the floor. Every muscle left in her body was now taut to its limits.   
Step after step, she moved closer to the white-painted doors of the medical aid chamber. The short distance she would normally cover in a few seconds seemed like an impossible task now. But her animal instincts prevailed, pushing her further and when she managed to reach the white door handle, Havre almost collapsed again.

Once in the chamber, Havre’s body moved unconsciously, as if disconnected from her mind. Her hands hurriedly opened all the cabinets one by one, until they found a small box with a red label on it. She flipped it over and poured out dozens of metal bottles stored inside. Then she carefully ripped off parts of her robes that covered her wounds. She struggled to open one of the bottles with her trembling fingers and when she finally unscrewed the cap, she spilled the disinfectant gel onto her burns. She could barely contain herself from screaming, as the pain rapidly increased when the antiseptic reacted with her open wounds. With the last bits of strength, she managed to reach another cabinet where the ointments were stored and pulled out the one that she remembered once treating a similar injury with. The medication’s consistency was grossly thick and smelled very intensely, but once it touched her open burn a wave of relief passed through Havre’s body. It helped bring her partially back to consciousness. With her mind now less hazy, she stumbled towards a shelf where painkillers were stored. 

She drank two bottles of the greenish drug, which was just enough to get her back on her feet. She shoved the rest inside her pockets and propping herself up against the metal panels of the ship she slowly walked up to the cockpit.

As part of her training, she learned how to manually operate a standard spacecraft, but she never had a chance to actually fly one on her own. Muttering the memorized instructions under her breath, she pressed on different buttons and switches on the control panel above her head. Finally, a dashboard in front of the pilot’s seat lit up, displaying a layout of the spacecraft and informed her that the engines were ready for lift-off. Simultaneously, the shuttle started to shake slightly, as all the mechanisms were set in motion. She grabbed the steering controller and slowly began to lift up the ship. A loud noise of the repulsorlift filled the air and the shuttle gradually rose up from the airstrip. When she was at least twenty meters high, Havre switched on the sublight drive and sped up. Her chest was rapidly pushed into the seat, as the starship wade through the atmosphere. 

Havre watched the planet's volcanic plane underneath her scatter into a faint red-black blur. And in a matter of minutes Mustafar, the birthplace of her hatred and rage, the place that taught her all she knew and all that she had grown to resent, became a distant, nebulous orb in outer space. She turned to the side window and took a last, long look at the place she was once forced to call her own. It appeared so harmless from a distance that a strange smile skimmed Havre’s face.

‘Fuck off.’ She muttered and turned around to face the command panel. She touched one of the holographic screens above the panel, and a large map appeared in front of her eyes. It displayed the whole galaxy, parted into sectors. A thrill of excitement passed through Havre when a target location request was displayed on a screen before her. So that was it. All that was left to do was to put in the coordinates. She used a small triangle keyboard to select the Outer Rim Territories, then the Anoat sector, and finally found the planet she was looking for. _Hoth_.

…

_A familiar face appeared behind a wall of smoke. Havre wanted to run towards that person but suddenly heard a cry for help behind her. She tried to turn around, but she couldn’t move her body. The strange voice started to fade away and then unexpectedly fell silent. Havre felt something shift inside of her head, something very dangerous and frightening. She panicked and felt a need to escape and opened her mouth to scream. But all that came out of her throat was a muffled cry. Then it all went…_

…

Dark. She blindly found a light switch and turned on the LED strips inside the steering pod. She must’ve passed out after enabling the autopilot. She impulsively looked around but didn’t notice anything out of place. She wondered why she felt anxious all of a sudden but later stated that it had something to do with her dream. She strained her memory, but, as usual, couldn’t remember even the smallest part of it. Eventually, she brushed it off and turned her focus on the map to check her current location.

Mustafar was located in the Atravis Sector of the Outer Rim, and to get to Hoth she had to cross the border of a nearby Anoat Sector. But before she could land on Hoth, she knew she had to get rid of her starship. She knew all shuttles classified as ones allied to the First Order, although monitored, didn’t have to go through the regular border control. During the ten years of serving for the Descendants of the Black Star, she took part in various different missions, and figured that the group must have been granted an additional immunity in some form, as they never even had to report their ship going out or in the Sector. She hoped that it would work for her again this time. And even if it didn’t, she reckoned she would probably be fine. Nobody in the entire Galaxy would voluntarily get into trouble with the Descendants. But that was the only thing in which the starship was useful to her. After what happened on Mustafar, she figured she would probably get a bounty on her head. And as long as she was on this starship, she could still be tracked by the Imperial Fleet. She had to find the nearest Market and get a new shuttle, preferably a smuggled one, without a connection to the First Order. She opened a list of planets in the Anoat Sector that was imprinted in the shuttle’s hard drive. After scrolling for a bit, a small planet caught her attention. It was called Bavva, and from the short description displayed next to it, Havre learned that there was a mere, interplanetary trade market located in its southern region.

‘Looks promising…’ she said to herself and tapped on the triangle keyboard and selected Bavva’s coordinates. 

After setting the autopilot Havre got up and immediately hissed in pain, as she moved her leg. Her wounds were still unhealed, although looked far better than before and she could see the beginning of skin regenerating around the burn. She left the cockpit and once again directed her steps to the medical aid chamber. Now that she had more time, she decided to wash inside the small showering compartment. She stripped off her clothes carefully and walked barefoot inside the pod. A shiver passed through her body when she turned on the faucet and the cold water dripped down her spine. She rubbed the sweat and dust off her face and neck with one hand, careful not to impair her wounded arm. She felt refreshed and sensed her overstretched muscles slowly relaxing. When she was done, she wrapped a medical cloth around her chest and sat down on a metal table in the middle of the room. She gently dried her scalds and reached for the medication she previously left on the floor. She felt an unspeakable relief when the rubbed in ointment began to percolate through her skin. Havre took a deep breath and laid down. 

At last, she felt peace. It was a strange sensation, something resembling a very distant memory from her past, a long-forgotten life she once had. She hadn’t felt it in so long, not even in her dreams. With every breath she took, she felt the sharp pain in her limbs slowly easing. Suddenly, her vision became blurred and when she blinked, two warm tears ran down her cheeks. She smiled, involuntarily. 

Laying down, Havre lost track of time. When she rallied from her stupor, she felt a sting of anxiety inside her stomach, as she realized that the ship must’ve been approaching the border by now. She quickly got up and left the chamber, still wrapped in the medical cloth. She hurried to the command cabin, leaving wet footmarks on the cold metal floor. She let out a sigh of relief when the digital map reassured her that the distance from the border was an estimated time of one hour. Havre made sure that the autopilot’s controls were still set in the right direction and decided to find some clean robes to wear. 

The ship, commonly called “X”, was a Xi-class light shuttle, upgraded to suit for intergalactic travel for over a dozen crew members. But during her years as a Descendant, no more than seven people were ever on the starship. The main aisle of the X was very narrow and led from the command cabin through a passage with five double sleep chambers on both sides to the embranchment at the end just before the trap exit, which separated the corridor into two wings. Located in one was the medical aid chamber, and in the other was the cargo storage space. Havre entered and ransacked each sleeping room in turn. Apart from the trash that her fellow members had left behind, she found a few articles of clothing, including a short-cut overall underrobe, several wraps, and a leather overrobe. She tightly banded the wraps around her forearms and thighs where the underrobe ended and put the overrobe on top. Everything was a little big for her, but she managed to put it in place with her belts, one which she put around her waist and two narrower ones crossed over her chest. The fabrics smelled like dust and metal and were nowhere near fresh nor perfectly clean, but Havre could take anything over her bloody robes. When changed, she decided to look around the cargo compartment, more out of curiosity than out of hope to find something useful. Usually, the ship was used to transport nothing more than viands and training equipment from the Imperial Trade Bases near Mustafar. She unlocked the compartment’s sectional door and pulled it up with a loud grinding sound. She revealed unpromisingly looking five metal storage chests. Each one had an engraving of the First Order’s mark with a serial number below it. She leaned over and opened the first one, closest to the door. Just as she expected, inside she found sealed packs of daily rations. Same thing in the next two.

‘In total…enough to last two months.’ She muttered, counting up the tightly stacked rations. ‘three if I’m not fastidious.’

She moved the three boxes against the wall and then crouched down before the other two, which were stacked upon each other in the corner. In the top one, she found metal scraps and pieces, which she figured were parts of training equipment or base improvements. She closed the chest and slowly moved it to the side, to reach the last one. It looked regularly, the same as the other boxes, but when she tried to lift the cover, she was met with unexpected resistance. She leaned down and looked closely at the latch. It appeared to be sealed with some kind of a sigil with the Sith alphabet written on it. But it formed a word strange to Havre, a one she had never seen. She tried to open it with the force but failed. Discouraged and uninterested, she left the odd chest in the compartment and walked back to the cockpit. She sat down in the pilot’s seat and looked at the digital map. The ship was entering the border zone. And suddenly, Havre felt a strong tug, as the ship was rapidly slowed down by, what she figured was a force field. The white LED lights in the cockpit rapidly turned red and a message appeared on the command panel:

“Your ship is now connected to the galactic vehicle control base of the Official Border Control of the First Order.”

Havre shifted anxiously in the seat and stared at the screen, waiting for another message. And after a few seconds new words started to form on it:

“Your passes are being checked.”

Just a second’s break. 

“General’s immunity – confirmed. Permit granted.”

Havre breathed a sigh of relief. The light shifted from red to white again and the ship was released from the Border Control’s force field. She was now in the Anoat Sector.

‘Smoother than I thought it would go…’ Havre said under her breath and switched off the autopilot. She placed her hands on the steering controller and slowly shifted the starship to the left. Outside the window, she could see outlines of a brownish yellow planet – Bavva. 


	2. Bavva

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After escaping the cult of the Descendants, Havre has to find a new ship on which she can travel unnoticed.

# Bavva

* * *

The planet was one of many in which the climate was mostly arid and whose shell was almost entirely covered by the sands of vast deserts. Sparse cities gathered around places where underground rivers flowed close below the surface, creating salutary oases. But while they appeared to be the center of the planet's community, they were actually only a facade. Bavva’s real core was the semi-legal trade market.

Havre landed the Xi amid hundreds of other starships surrounding the fair. The model of her shuttle turned out to be a vastly used one and she was rid of the fear of catching unwanted attention. From her old robes, she formed a makeshift bag and tied it across her chest. Inside she put her lightsabers and two bottles of painkillers. She then ripped off part of her black cloak, put it over her mouth and nose, and tied it in the back of her head. So prepared, she stepped outside the starship on the sandy land of Bavva. 

Instantly she was hit with the rays of two suns above her head. It was midday - the hottest hour. But as uncomfortable as it was, it didn’t seem to be of any obstacle to the crowds pouring over to the market. In seconds, Havre was surrounded by thousands of Humans, green-skinned Rodians and Duros, tall Cereans towering over the crowd, round skulled Sullustans, Biths and Advozcecs, slim Weequays, and really a lot of species Havre had never seen before. Between it all, an abundance of strange-looking animals dragged behind their owners on rusty chains. The air was bustling with calls and screams that from time to time were muffled by the loud roars of different creatures. And even the makeshift mask on her face couldn’t protect Havre from the horrifying smell of sweat and feces. She stood in place for a few seconds, dumbfounded by all that was happening around her, until someone roughly pushed her to the side, growling:

‘Move, kid!’ 

Havre quickly jumped between near parked starships and from there tried to get an idea of where to go. But after a moment of hesitation, she decided to just blend into the crowd, that clearly headed in one direction, and reach the market’s center. From there she thought it would be easier for her to get a sense of direction.

People moved rather quickly as if everyone was heading to the market for one specific reason and couldn’t be bothered to roam around. Havre tried to pick up her pace, to not get trampled, and from time to time had to dodge strikes from large boxes and cages hovering on someone’s back. One good thing came from it though. If someone would come after her asking questions, nobody would remember her ever being there. After a troublesome, long twenty minutes of stumbling on the dusty road, she finally reached the first tents on the periphery of the market. There, the crowd slowly started to thin out, as people headed in different directions. Havre knew she had to focus on founding a shuttle dealer but couldn’t help looking at the merchant stands she was passing by. She had never seen such an abundance of things. From stacks of different colored fruits and vegetables to metal scraps and house appliances, everywhere she looked, she saw a new, strange object. She began to wonder how many of these things others would call ordinary, while they were news to someone like her - a girl hidden from the world all her life. 

‘So where is he?! He told me he had a speeder bike ready for me yesterday!’ someone’s low and loud voice brought her back to reality. She turned around and saw a big Bith leaning over some merchant, who was trying to calm him down. 

‘Sir, the speeders were supposed to arrive tomorrow, you must’ve misheard…’ he squeaked. 

‘MISHEARD?! Are you _trying_ to piss me off?!’ 

‘Speed bikes…? That’s as close to a shuttle as you can get.’ Havre thought to herself and directed her steps to the merchant. Behind him, she saw a large sign and on it written in different languages: “YACHTS, SPEEDERS, SPEED BIKES, SHUTTLES - GO GET YOURS AT KOOLO'S''. Under it, someone drew a simple map with the directions to the shop. Havre passed the Bith, who was now shaking the poor salesman holding him by the flaps of his robe, and joined the line of people walking in the direction she was heading towards. In this area, the tents were replaced by hastily constructed metal booths with larger and more stable counters. The ware also changed to more advanced mechanic parts and small droids. The longer she walked, the more expensive the goods seemed to be. Finally, she stopped in front of a large shop with a red neon sign - Koolo’s. 

She walked inside, through the open doors, and looked around. The store was located in what seemed to once be an empty depot. Inside someone arranged dozens of poorly structured holographic stands, that displayed various different starships and shuttles. Customers walked around them, trying to find the best deal. Havre wanted to get closer to one of the holograms, when suddenly, a short man appeared in front of her, blocking the way. 

‘Hello, how can I help you?’ he said. Havre looked down at the green-skinned Rodian, who’s eyes showed no sincere desire to help. 

‘How much for a starfighter?’ she asked, not even trying to be polite. 

The salesman squinted his eyes. 

‘A starfighter? What do _you_ need a starfighter for?’

‘That’s none of your business.’ she said curtly.

‘Oh, believe me, it is.’ He replied, putting on a mean smile. ‘You got your form?’

‘What form?’ she asked and quickly regretted it, as the man crossed his arms and looked at her with disdain.

‘What do you think? A certificate from Border Control! If you don’t have your form, there’s no reason for you to be here.’

‘You report your ships?’ she asked. 

‘Of course, we report our ships, what kind of shop do you think this is?!’ He screeched. ‘No form - no deal,’ he stated and showed her the door with a rather blunt manner. Havre clenched her teeth and walked out of the shop. She should have guessed that smuggled ships wouldn't be sold in this sort of place. She sighed and looked around. There were a lot of shops similar to Koolo’s, some bigger, some smaller than others, but all seemed to be one’s “requiring a form”. She figured the only way she was ever going to get a ship, was to use the force to manipulate a salesman. She wasn’t going to try it on that Rodian salesman, though. 

Before she could take another step, someone tapped her on her arm. She turned quickly, extending her hand in a defensive habit. 

‘Whoa, whoa!’ she heard a muffled laugh and looked at the man standing in front of her. The human was about her height, dressed in sandy-colored scrappy clothes, and a turban, to which he had tied a piece of cloth vailing his mouth and nose. His big, brown eyes smiled at Havre from behind the cover. 

‘What do you want?’ she asked impulsively. 

‘You looking for a ship?’ he asked, ignoring her question. Havre didn’t answer. ‘I don’t need a form as Koolo’s does.’ he added and winked at her. 

Havre blinked and before answering, she reached into his mind. “A smuggler…” she thought to herself and relaxed. He didn’t know her. He stood there every day, waiting to grab a new customer. 

‘Alright.’ she said out loud. ‘Do you have starfighters?’

‘Follow me’ he said and turned around. He moved in a weirdly light, almost nonchalant manner, leading her through tight, hidden passageways between shops and tents. 

‘Starfighters, shuttles, drones, bikers,’ he said, as they turned right and walked by a row of weird, hairy animals with saddles on their backs that appeared to be way too small for them. ‘Anything you want, really,’ he said and Havre noticed that he had a lisp. 

‘Sounds like a legitimate business…’ she said.

‘Oh, believe me, there is nothing legitimate about it. That’s what guarantees you a good deal,’ he said and nicked a round fruit from a nearby stand. ‘The other places, like the one you went to, Koolo’s, are all corrupted, won’t tell you shit about what you’re buying. Might sell you a starfighter with a sail barge engine,’ he laughed and suddenly turned left, walking in between two tents. ‘Where’ you from, anyways?’ he asked. 

Havre didn’t answer. 

‘Alright, no need to tell me,’ he chuckled. ‘I’m no ISB.’

He led her out of the main market area and gestured toward a big flat-topped hill with steep sides that the market was built around. Inside the red walls of the hill, she could see a row of carved out windows and doors, as well as steep steps that led to them. 

‘That’s where _our main office_ is’ he said, mimicking a salesman. 

‘Why are we going there?’ Havre asked and stopped half a step. 

‘What? You don’t want to make the deal here, do you, honey?’ he winked at her. 

‘Don’t call me that,’ she drawled. ‘I don’t want this to take more than it needs to.’

‘Relax, I have to get my equipment from there anyway. Come on.’

They walked up the hill in silence. The office was located in the last room on the first floor of the rock-building. The man courteously let her inside first, mumbling some foreign words under his breath. The inside was really just a small carved out room, with random furniture made out of metal scraps that looked kind of like parts of a shuttle put by the red-rock walls. 

The smuggler took off his veil and tucked it on his turban. He seemed to be in his thirties; his face had a natural olive tone, but the part that wasn’t covered by his veil looked darker, burnt by the cruel desert sun. He rubbed his unshaven, strongly defined chin. 

‘You’re not gonna take that off?’ he asked, pointing at her face. Havre just shook her head “no”. ‘Alright.’

‘Javiee?!’ another man’s voice called out from the inside of the place. 

‘Yeah, Heo, got a new customer!’ Javiee yelled back and smiled at Havre. She crossed her arms, impatiently. 

‘Sweet!’ A dark-skinned man walked out from the back into the room, cleaning his hands with a dirty cloth. He appeared to be around the other man’s age, but he was shorter and less muscular. ‘Hello,’ he raised his eyebrows when he gazed at Havre and then turned back at his partner. ‘What’s the deal then?’ 

‘A starfighter.’ she said. 

‘Well alright, we’ve got starfighters, crew-sized ones for twenty thousand, one-pilots for…’

‘I want to trade.’ she said, cutting him off. Heo’s face fell. 

‘Hold on, big-shot, we don’t trade.’ He said, holding up his palms and looked at Javiee with reproof. 

‘What do you have?’ the other man asked, ignoring his partner.

‘Xi light class.’ she answered. Heo rolled his eyes and shook his head. 

‘That’s no use, sweetheart, we got that already. Javiee, I told you to check them first, didn’t I?’

‘What’s on it?’ Javiee ignored his partner yet again.

‘I’m not giving you my cargo.’ Havre stated.

‘Well, you’re not helping.’ he said, sending her an impatient look and clicked his tongue. Havre was ready to use the force, but suddenly she remembered…

‘I have a general’s immunity on the ship.’ as she said that both men looked first at each other and then back at her. 

‘Well I’d be damned, where did you get that?’ Javiee’s eyes widened. 

‘Doesn’t matter, I have what you want, right?’ she said. ‘I want your best starfighter.’

‘Well, calm down, now, sweetie, we might have to check that first.’ Hoe crossed his arms. ‘It wouldn’t be the first time someone tried to offer us something that ended up being a bunch of bullshit.’

‘I’m not lying.’ Havre frowned.

‘Show us the ship.’ Javiee said, stretching out his hands in a gesture as if to soothe them. ‘I’m sure there is something worth seeing on it.’

Havre led them to her Xi. When she let them inside, they looked around the ship suspiciously, probably expecting a general’s dead body lying around somewhere. Heo got inside the cockpit and tinkered under the command panel for a while. Javiee seemed to be intrigued with Havre and kept looking at her, with both distrust and admiration; but he didn’t say a word. Finally, Heo got up from underneath the pilot’s seat and looked first at Havre then at Javiee.

‘Checks out.’ he said simply. ‘I have no idea where you got that from, but… We have a deal.’

They helped Havre take out the boxes stored in the cargo compartment and muttered something to each other when they saw the First Order’s marks on the covers. She ignored them, but began to wonder, for how much would they be able to sell information about her. If someone would’ve come asking for a runaway traitor, there is no way they wouldn’t put two and two together. It would be better if she altered their memories. This was something the Force could be used for, but she never trained her mind enough to do that well, and it would be hard especially now, when she’s distracted and weak. “Should I just kill them…?” she thought to herself, but quickly brushed off that idea, as she imagined that two dead bodies would catch even more attention. 

‘That’s it.’ Heo and Javiee stopped and put the boxes down. Havre looked up. They led her just several dozen meters down from her landing space. Javiee was pointing to a strange starship parked between two smaller hover shuttles. It looked like it was old. Its paint was nearly all scratched off, some parts appeared to be altered or replaced with a different model. 

‘That’s a GAT-12 Blastboat, a Skipray’ said Heo and patted the side of the ship. ‘This is our baby. Class Two hyperdrive, tested, cleaned out. Originally could get you to four hyper-jumps, made it to five with some upgrades. Yours truly.‘ He bowed his head. ‘Stocked up as shit, also. Three medium ion cannons, two laser ones, a proton torpedo, and a concussion missile launcher. Used in the last war I believe, not sure by which side though.’ 

‘Last war?’ Havre frowned. ‘How old is this junk?’

‘Hey!’ Heo seemed to be personally offended by that question. ‘That’s for sure one of the best ships on this market, and I assure you, the best one you can get with a trade!’

‘He’s right.’ Javiee nodded and patted his partner on the back. He reached into his bag and took a strange object out of it. ‘That’s the key.’ he passed to her what turned out to be a short, metal pipe marked in red.

‘What is this?’ she asked, confused. 

‘There’s a lock on the door, you put it inside, you open it.’ Heo explained mockingly. ‘I made it, so no junk-jumpers would steal our drive. Are we done here?’

Havre looked at them and realized that was her last chance to clear their memory. She helplessly tried to focus her mind. As she used the force, their faces gradually shifted and became indistinct, but she had no idea if anything in their memories had changed. She could just hope for the best. She blinked and let go of the force, suddenly feeling very weak and tired. 

‘Are we done here?’ Heo repeated in the same tone. Javiee looked at him, confused, but stayed silent. Havre nodded her head “yes”. Both men turned around to walk away.

‘Take care of it, will ya?’ Heo said as he gave the Skipray one last look. 

‘Sure…’ she answered. 

‘Pleasure doing business with you.’ said Javiee, but his voice indicated he was kind of surprised by what he said. Havre watched them go until they vanished among the other ships. 

The door was located on the side of the shuttle, about a meter above the ground. And sure enough, Havre found a strange-looking lock on the handle. When she stuck the pipe inside, the mechanism was triggered and the handle turned on its own, unlocking the door. Havre pulled herself up and jumped onto the ship. 

The Skipray’s inside was lined with greenish-brown metal panels and its lights had a warm yellow tint. It was far smaller than the Xi. The tight passage on the side of the door led into a small tech compartment with three seats, each one connected to a different weapon controller. The computers looked old and had a thick layer of dust on them, but seemed still efficient. Havre opened the hatch to the cockpit and looked around the command panel. At first, it appeared to be a completely different system from the one on Xi, but when she focused on individual buttons and switches, she began to recognize the same patterns. 

‘Okay…’ she sighed and sat in the pilot’s seat. It hovered to the back, and when Havre looked down under it, she realized it was made in a way that the pilot could move around the cockpit on two parallel rails. When she finally found the engine starter, the ship shuddered heavily and the command panel lit up at once. Havre looked at two small glass screens in the middle of the panel. One displayed a map of the galaxy, which Havre figured must have been updated by Heo to match the new order. The second screen showed a plan of the ship. The engine, which was located on the stern of the shuttle, was marked in green, as well as two laser cannons on the sides. Havre looked on the steering pad in front of the pilot’s seat and noticed two red buttons covered by removable protection. “So, the laser cannons can be operated by the pilot…” she thought. “That’s useful.”

After a couple of tries, she figured how to enter coordinates on the small computer screens and finally, a red line showed her a way to Hoth. 

She pressed a switch above her head to start the repulsorlift and the ship slowly rose up. The lift-off wasn’t as smooth as it was with the Xi shuttle and Havre almost crashed into a nearby hoverbike. But after a few minutes, she successfully lifted up into the air and switched the repulsorlift to the sublight drive. She maneuvered between other landing shuttles above the market and when she was in a safe distance from the traffic, she sped up, leaving Bavva’s atmosphere.


	3. Hoth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Havre managed to get on a deserted planet Hoth, on which she discovers something important about herself...

# 

# Hoth

* * *

# Hoth

Something moved behind the tree and Havre quickly pulled out her saber. 

‘Come on…’ she muttered under her breath, nervously clenching her finger around the metal handle of her weapon. She had been tracking the animal for over an hour. She was tired and hungry, and now on top of that, she was starting to feel her fingers and toes freezing in the cold. Finally, a pair of two pointy white ears appeared from behind the tree in front of her. Wasting no time, Havre jumped over to the animal and with a quick swish of her saber managed to chop its head off. ‘There you go…’ she sighed and hunched over the animal. ‘Not too much meat on you, but it’ll do.’ She put the dead prey over her shoulder and attached her weapon to the side of her thigh. 

She had been on Hoth for over a week. The first days in the new climate turned out to be way more difficult than she had imagined. Firstly she had to find a safe place to land her starship and keep it sheltered from the snow which fell every other day. After a good half-day of searching, she stumbled upon a shallow cave inside a low, rocky mountain. The starship fit perfectly inside of it and thanks to branchy conifers that grew on its side, the shelter was practically invisible to anyone passing by. 

The biggest problem turned out to be her clothes. The robes she took with her from Xi were far too thin for Hoth’s climate, and so she had to make new ones. The Skipray had one single sleeping chamber in which she found a couple of old, worn-out blankets and sheets. She sewed them together as well as she could, and in the end came out with something in the form of a wrap-around coat and leg warmers. They turned out to handle the snowy outdoors well, and enabled her to go out for longer than just a couple of minutes. 

Havre spent most of her two first weeks on Hoth exploring the area surrounding her shelter. She went out every morning for long walks around the snowy forests trying to get a hold of every new thing. The snow, the trees, the bright sunlight, and the three large moons in the sky - everything was astonishing to her nescient instincts. The landscape soothed her. It all was so quiet and still - almost dead, but beautiful. Havre recalled a large white crystal hanging in one of the Sith Temples on Korriban. She remembered that during long, tiring lessons she had to take there she would always fix her eyes on the clear stone and forget about everything else. Hoth seemed to embody that crystal, not only in its appearance, but in a way that made Havre at peace. 

The woods on Hoth were very sparse and Havre first assumed that no animals lived there, but then began to find various trails around the trees. When she found an area where the footprints were more frequent, she decided to climb one of the trees and wait if any animal would show itself. And so, after a couple of minutes, she saw a pack of white-furred Rayboos. Havre recognized them, as similar ones lived in the woods of Korriban, which she had to hunt as a part of her early training. 

The hunt was fruitful. She walked back to the Skipray with two of the bigger Rayboos and used their fur to make the lining for her clothes. Their meat was hard and bland, but it was more than enough. Havre decided to eat whatever she could find in the forest first, and save the food rations from the Xi unit for any future travels she would have to embark upon. 

She became familiar with the area pretty quickly, as there wasn’t much to explore. Every forest she passed through looked the same and beyond the mountains, she lived in the bottom of, stretched out a never-ending snow-covered desert. After days of aimless wandering, Havre found herself getting bored. It was rather a pleasant and calming feeling, but it got to the point where she felt that it wasn't enough. 

One evening, when she sat down by the fire she made, Havre realized that for all this time spent on Hoth she hadn't been using the Force. She didn’t understand why, but since she was alone it just felt simply unnecessary. She threw the gnawed Rayboos bone away, and pulled out her hand towards the water bottle standing next to her. 

But nothing happened. The bottle didn’t move an inch. Havre blinked, stupored, and tried again. After a minute, the muscles in her arm started to twitch with tension, but the bottle stayed still, as if it was mocking her. 

‘What the…’ she scoffed, refusing to believe in what had just happened. ‘Maybe I’m just tired…?’ she pondered, but deep down she knew that was a lie. 

The next day came and nothing changed. For hours on end, Havre tried to reach out to the Force in different ways - moving objects, levitating… but nothing worked… The Force seemed to have left her. 

When once again she opened her eyes after yet again failing to find focus on the Force and was dazzled by the Sun’s reflection in the snow all around her, something inside of her… broke. A wave of panic and frustration came rushing down, and her breath became short. With her heart pounding, she felt like she was about to explode. Only a couple of minutes later did she realize that she was running blindly through the forest, cutting her arms on the protruding tree branches. Suddenly, she tripped over a hole in the ground and came crashing down, painfully smashing her face on the cold icy snow. 

Everything around her was quiet and still. 

_ Too still. _

Havre felt the warmth of tears coming down her face.

She had never in her life felt so weak. 

The treetops rustled as the birds suddenly flew up, startled by Havre’s shrill scream breaking the silence.

She had no idea how long she lay there in the snow, crying, but when she finally stood up on her feet, the sun was already setting. She walked back to the Skipray, with her head empty and numb, and hid inside the small, warm sleeping room inside the ship. 

She took her wet clothes off and wrapped herself in a blanket. She put her feet on one of the warm radiators on the wall and closed her eyes. 

‘What is wrong with me…?’ she asked again, this time calmly. ‘What is wrong…?’

She instinctively reached out to the Force. 

‘Tell me what’s wrong,’ she asked, this time inside her head. 

She at once felt calm and clear. 

Her arms and legs felt numb as she disconnected from her body.

‘What am I doing wrong?’ she asked again.

A quick vision appeared in front of her. 

_ A glass orb, filled with muddy water, rolling over, crashing beneath her feet. The water sank into the ground.  _

Havre opened her eyes, strangely surprised that she wasn’t at all confused by what she saw. She felt like she had for a second been connected to someone else’s mind and that their thoughts just simply passed onto her. She somehow understood the message without any words, although it was just a direction, and not a solution. 

The next day a strong feeling woke Havre up early in the morning. She jumped out of the bed and quickly got dressed. She left the Skipray leaving her weapons inside, feeling she wasn’t going to be needing them that day. 

It was still dark outside and the cold breeze felt like tiny needles on the parts of her skin her clothes didn’t cover. Havre picked up her pace to warm up and rushed onto the steep hillside, where the cave with her ship was hidden. 

The way to the top was very difficult - she had to watch her step not to slip on ice-covered rocks sticking from the frozen ground, or not to sink in the holes covered by loose snow. But an inexplicable excitement pushed her to go up further. Since the second she woke up, she had a feeling that something was waiting for her on that hilltop. 

Sweat was running down her spine underneath the layers of her clothing and her breath became shorter as she reached the halfway point where the forest began to thin out. She slowed down a bit, as her feet drowned in the deep snow, but still proceeded to move up ahead. About half an hour later, she reached the end of the mountain on which she could walk. From that point onward it turned into a nearly vertical solid rock wall. Not thinking too much of it, Havre stretched out her hands and grabbing on the uneven surface of the wall, pulled herself up. Havre’s muscles built up by the recent exercise served her well. Or maybe it was the excitement pumping through her veins. Regardless, she was climbing steady and fast, jumping from one edge to another, nearly breaking her nails on the hard surface of the rock. When she finally pulled herself up on the flat plate on the top of the hill, she couldn’t catch her breath for a long minute. Holding on to the wall, she stood up on trembling feet and looked around. 

The view from the top of the mountain was astounding. White fields of snowy desert stretched all the way to the horizon, interrupted here and there, by a strip of irregular black forest. Lighted by the faint light of the rising sun, the Planet looked as if it was carved out of the clouds. When she looked to the right, she saw that the mountain she was standing on was part of a small range that ended up with a strange, steep cliff, as if a large piece of rock was torn off of it. There was no trace of a village or a town anywhere. Havre was completely alone. 

The excitement suddenly plummeted. She realized she had no idea what she was expecting, but somehow this lonely view seemed unbearably disappointing. She sat down and took off the cloth that was covering her mouth. Her breath turned into vapor in the cold. She crossed her legs and closed her eyes. She remembered the vision she had the night before. She was certain she understood it back then, but now it felt strange, like it had disconnected from her during her sleep. She couldn’t remember what realization came to her mind when she saw it, but it felt crucial. 

‘What does it mean?’ she asked out loud and was met with a cold breeze brushing against her cheeks. ‘What does it mean…?’ she asked again, this time in her mind. 

Nothing happened. 

“Am I asking the wrong questions?” she thought to herself. 

‘What do I do?’

Still no answer. 

‘What do you want me to do?!’ 

The wind blew into her face again, but this time with doubled power. 

‘What do you want?!’ 

She lost focus and frustration came rushing down on her. She stood up rapidly and put her arm up, as she felt a strong urge to ram it into the ground. The wind blew into her with such force, that she lost her balance and at the last second managed to grab the mountain’s wall and not fall down the steep side. 

With her eyes widened from fear, she looked down the cliff where chunks of snow from underneath her feet disappeared into the abyss. And right then, with her heart racing like crazy, she suddenly felt so stupid, that she couldn’t help but laugh at herself. 

‘Alright... ‘ she scoffed out loud, not knowing exactly what or whom she was addressing. ‘I get it…! So I am the glass ball?’ 

The wind howled in response. 

From that moment onwards, Havre felt a shift in her attitude toward the force. Ultimately, everything she knew about it was taught by her master on Mustafar, but it felt inadequate. As a youngling, she learned that the abilities which Sith gain from the rituals and training are meant to turn the Force into an obedient weapon. They told her that it is only meant to be used to one’s advantage, to gain power or strength, and that Sith are the chosen tribe, called in by the force that is destined to serve them in their wish. Havre remembered that to be true, as far as she used the Force on Mustafar. It did truly  _ serve  _ her back then, it felt like a powerful weapon in her hands, but now… it turned out to be something completely different.

And only after she had let go of everything she knew, she started noticing new truths around her. She opened her mind to its limits and suddenly became aware of her surroundings, as if she looked at and heard everything for the very first time - every leaf and every creature was familiar, close… She realized it was the force connecting her to nature. Havre felt it all around, as much as she felt it inside of her. At once it wasn’t something to conquer but something to befriend. 

Later Havre couldn’t truly describe how she became aware of all of those truths, but deep down she believed that it was the force that came to her first. And so one morning just before the sun went up Havre could levitate again. 


	4. Captured

# 

# Captured

* * *

Havre was levitating two meters above the ground. A soft buzzing sound filled her ears. First snowflakes started falling from the sky, and for just a second she saw them flare, reflecting red light in front of her eyes, before evaporating in the radiation of the two lightsabers floating on both sides of her head. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. One of the lightsabers turned around its axis and slowly rose up. With her eyes still closed, Havre reached out her hand and grabbed it. The second lightsaber began to lower, and once it was in her desired position, she caught it too. Slowly, she tilted her head back and turned her whole body upside down in the air. In a second’s motion, she flexed her muscles and with a short swish cut the air with the weapons. A short squeak came from underneath her. She opened her eyes and jumped back to the ground, landing softly on her feet. 

‘Perfect,’ she said to herself and crouched in front of a dead Rayboo. She attached her lightsabers to a strap around her thigh and grabbed the animal’s legs, ready to head back to the Skipray. 

Suddenly she froze in motion. Somewhere far from a distance, a familiar sound reached her ears. She dropped the dead animal on the snow and looked up to the sky.

‘There is no way…’ she whispered under her breath, but as the words left her mouth, the sound became louder and before she could make any other move, a large Xi starship appeared in the sky. 

Havre’s heart dropped. She took a few steps back in shock. And then, as if something had pinched her, she came back to her senses. In a second she started sprinting back to the cave, jumping over the bushes and roots underneath her feet. Adrenaline pumped into her veins and she ran faster than she ever had. She knew that the ship was in such a position, that she had no more than five minutes till it would land. She had to get out of Hoth in that time, but she was way too far from the Skipray, and the shuttle was coming in closer and closer with every second. 

She dashed out of the woods onto an empty snowfield and saw the mountain, where her cave was located, loom in the distance. She wasn’t even halfway there…

Her feet were now moving so fast it felt like she was barely touching the snow. It was as if something was pushing Havre from behind, helping her run. Her breath became shorter, but somehow she didn’t feel tired, her muscles were tightening to the edge, but she felt no pain in her limbs, her heart was racing like crazy, but she felt no need to stop. She pinned her eyes on the darker spot on the bottom of the mountain before her. 

_ ‘I can make it’ _ she thought to herself. But in this exact moment, she heard a loud thumping sound. The ship landed. 

Several things happened at once during the next thirty seconds. All that Havre would remember was seeing the outline of the cave, hearing a loud, strange noise behind her, and then feeling as if something rapidly twisted around her leg and pulled it so hard, she dropped to the ground, battering her limbs. Havre’s face smashed painfully into the cold snow. She instantly tried to get back up, but the chain around her leg was now being pulled by something, dragging her on the ground towards the alien ship. She tried to dig her fingers into the ground and resist, but it was useless. Then a strain of clarity skimmed her panicked mind and she reached to her side grabbing her lightsaber at the last moment before the dragging stopped, and she heard a distorted voice say:

‘Tie her up.’

She instantly jumped up, drawing her lightsaber. Her eyes were covered in snow and what she saw was only blurry, dark silhouettes surrounding her. She quickly closed her eyes and reached out to the Force. The time slowed down for just a moment and she felt her pulse calm down. Then, just like when she had practiced, the world around her was clear and visible without her eyesight. She sensed four dark-energy figures around her, a shelter she knew in the distance and a ship landed behind her. And when she was ready, the world sped up again. One of the figures approached her and she instantly ducked, ramming her saber into the chain wrapped around her leg, breaking it in two. The attacker pushed her to the ground, and Havre used it to roll over and jam her saber into their legs. She heard a shrill scream and other voices that yelled:

‘Get her!’ 

Havre was attacked from every side at once. She swung her saber left and right, trying to block four different weapons in one motion. She struggled to stand her ground, but every time she would dodge one hit, another came right at her. She pushed away one of the attackers with her feet, but that only created an opportunity for others to knock her down to the ground. For a split second she thought she would manage to get up and then… she felt something hard hit her head and everything went dark. 

The next thing she remembered was pain in her arms and the back of her head, reassuring her that she was still alive. She opened her eyes slowly and flinched with alarm, seeing a face in front of her, only to realize it was her own reflection. She had a big swollen bruise under her eye and dried blood coming down her forehead. She tried to move her hands and legs, but couldn't. She looked down, and realized she was lying inside some kind of a narrow capsule, with a glass cover over her head. Her limbs and stomach were strapped tightly with multiple metal girdles. She looked outside the capsule. The chamber she was put in looked familiar to the ones on Xi she once used. The walls and floors were practically the same, lit with an unpleasant red light. In the middle, she saw a big metal chair covered in wires that Havre thought she wouldn’t want to know the usage of.

She tried to calm herself and focus. She had no idea how long she had been lying there. For all she knew, the ship could’ve been days away from Hoth. But that didn’t matter now. Havre had to get out of the capsule first. If she had any chance of escaping, she had to take it. She closed her eyes and reached out to the force. A wave of energy warmed around her and she felt it shift inside her veins and into her limbs. She focused and slowly tried to open the straps that were locked around her right hands. Sweat started coming down her face, as she tried to push the force onto the locks. 

‘Come on…’ she muttered through clenched teeth and the straps slowly started to yield. Finally after a brief moment, Havre heard a loud cracking sound of the straps breaking. She felt a rush of adrenaline pump through her veins, but held her breath and listened for a while, afraid that the sound would alarm someone. But no one came. 

She took another deep breath and calmed down, focusing on breaking the rest of the straps. A few minutes later, her legs and arms were free. She already felt exhausted and decided to wait a little while before trying to open the door of the capsule, afraid she would pass out from overusing the Force. She lay there for not more than a minute, before she heard a sudden hissing sound of the blast door opening. She immediately closed her eyes and pretended to sleep. Loud, heavy footsteps echoed inside the chamber and walked up to her. Havre heard a cracking sound of a transmitter. 

‘F04. Nothing here. Over.’ the guard reported. 

‘Check the girl.’ An order came from a receiver. 

‘Roger. She’s still out. Over.’ 

Havre heard the footsteps walk away and then a hissing sound of the door again. She waited a few seconds to make sure the guard was gone and then opened her eyes. 

Opening the capsules lock was easier than breaking the straps, and after just a minute, she managed to get out. When she stood up straight, she immediately felt so weak, she had to hold on to the wall. Her legs and arms were bruised and her headache suddenly got heavier. 

‘Stay focused…’ she whispered to herself. ‘find your sabers first…’ She walked up to the door and opened them with the force. It was easy, as she already knew how door locks on the Xi worked. The corridor outside the chamber was empty. Havre quietly moved through the metal halls, listening to every small sound and ready to hide at any given moment. She knew she had no chance in a fight, even with the youngest trooper. She was weak and without a weapon, but she wasn’t at a total disadvantage. The ship was so similar to her Xi, she had a good sense of direction and knew a good part of the mechanics. She decided to get to the arsenal first, which she imagined would be located next to the cargo. 

‘You said they would transfer G60 to the other unit.’ A distant voice reached her. She quickly jumped to the side and slid behind one of the radiators. Two stormtroopers walked from around a corner.

‘I heard the commander saying she was considering that,’ one of them answered the other. ‘Hypothetically, she could transfer either one of us at any moment.’

‘Hold on, I was told we were settled for a good year!’

‘We were told a lot of things.’ 

Stormtroopers walked past Havre and she noticed that each one had a blaster attached on a strap over their shoulder. 

‘Not on guard,’ she thought. ‘So there were no orders to patrol the ship. I must be the only prisoner… And they didn’t expect me to wake up…’ Havre carefully walked out of her hiding and headed down the corridor. In the end, it split into two narrower passages and after a quick moment of hesitation, Havre turned into the left one, which turned out to be a long hall with common chambers on both left and right. She figured nobody was inside, as it were still patrol hours, so she headed quickly down the corridor. If the two Xi were indeed as similar as she had expected, the cargo point should’ve been located at the end of the hall. 

She tried to muffle the sound of her feet on the metal floor and at the same time keep listening for any troops coming her way. She was focused like never before, as if the Force was helping her without her effort to keep in contact with it; like it was trying to help her survive. At last, she reached the end of the corridor, which opened into a broad room with four segment doors of the cargo compartments. A wave of satisfaction and relief came through her. Havre jumped over to the nearest one to pull it up. 

‘You really just can’t stay put, can you?’ a distorted low voice suddenly came from behind her. Havre quickly turned around to see a tall, dark figure standing in the dim entrance of the corridor. Before she could react in any way, the man pulled out his hand and Havre felt a rapid strain of force surrounding her. She tried to push it back immediately, but she was too weak. The force was stronger than anything she ever felt. Aggressive, murderous almost, it hurt like a red-hot metal. ‘Don’t fight it,’ the man's voice was contrastingly calm and cold. ‘You know you’re not strong enough.’

It felt as if Havre was being clenched by a metal ring, tightening more and more with every second. She couldn't open her mouth, her whole body was completely paralyzed, forcing her eyes to focus on the man's dark silhouette. His hand slowly turned to the side and the force pushed onto her even stronger. Havre’s face turned red, as she suffocated and the image before her eyes became blurry. “I’m going to die…” a thought skimmed her head and she put all the strength she had left into a last desperate push, before collapsing onto the ground. She heard heavy footsteps over her head. The man picked her up like she weighed nothing.

‘We need to talk.’ she heard before passing out again. 

She woke up on the floor inside the same round chamber, she had previously escaped from. Her hands and legs were tied with metal cuffs. She felt a blinding pain in her skull and was so exhausted, she considered just closing her eyes and falling asleep on the floor. 

‘After what I’ve heard I expected you to… I guess… put up more of a fight.’ 

Havre slowly raised her head and saw that the dark man from the corridor was now sitting in front of her. He was wearing an all-black leather robe and a cape and had his face hidden behind a helmet with a trapeze-shape mask, which seemed to be the thing distorting his voice. 

She remained quiet.

‘Don’t you want to know why you’re here? Alive?’ he asked and tilted his head. ‘No? Well, you might want to talk when I’m the one asking questions.’ He said and stood up. Havre followed him with her gaze. ‘I know who you are. A member of the Descendants of the Black Star, trained by master Kadmûr on Mustafar. You were a nobody until you killed him. Him, and the rest. But why?’ He stopped, waiting for an answer. 

Havre didn’t give it to him. 

‘You still won’t talk, huh? You know I can take whatever I want.’ he looked at her and Havre immediately felt a shift in the Force, as he tried to enter her mind. But no matter how exhausted and weak Havre was, she had the skill of blocking her mind mastered so well, she didn’t even have to try to do it. The man seemed to be taken aback by her resistance and Havre felt him pushing harder, getting angrier and angrier with every second that he was failing. 

‘What are you trying to hide…?’ he muttered with irritation. 

‘Who are you?’ Havre asked and looked up at his mask. She felt him let go of her mind, as his head turned to her. 

‘I would expect you to know who I am, but basing on your actions, you might have thought I did not exist.’

‘Are you with the Sith Eternal?’ She asked. 

‘So you don’t know who I am…’ he scoffed. ‘That explains a lot.’

Havre was confused but stayed silent, expecting the man to explain. 

‘You thought you knew enough, you might just kill your way to Snoke. Is that right?’ his voice was cold, but Havre felt like this time there was a slight shift in his attitude. She stayed silent.

‘Did you think he would praise your determination? That he would just grant you a right-hand position because you killed his servants? Were you truly that special in the first place?’

Havre closed her eyes. 

‘LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU!’ He kicked her in the stomach and she fell face down on the floor, letting out a howl of pain. He leaned over her and drawled: ‘He will destroy you, you stupid girl…’ 

‘Sir’ a different voice interrupted him. ‘We are approaching the station in five.’

‘Contact the commander. Tell him to clear the pathway down. I have what I came for.’ He drawled and pushed her on his way out.

‘Yes sir.’ 

They both left the chamber and Havre heard the blast door shut. She let out a quiet whine of pain and slowly turned to lay on her back.

When the ship landed, two stormtroopers came into the chamber and picked her up. Held by her arms from both sides, she was escorted from the ship onto a landing strip. The platform was enormous, with dozens of identical starfighters and cargo ships docked, ready for set off. They were surrounded by technicians and stormtroopers in white and black uniforms, some with weapons on hold, ready for any insubordination. The masked man from before, commanded her guards to follow him and they all headed towards a wide, red-lit door on the other side of the landing strip. On their way there, troops saluted the man, but he paid them no attention. He walked so fast Havre was practically being dragged by her guards, as she was barely able to walk. When they reached the door, the man waved his hand low and opened it, revealing a big elevator with three led paneled walls. The door shut and the elevator took off with a low, rising sound. Apart from it, there was complete silence. Havre felt radiating energy from the man, as if he was pleased or excited, but in a cold, almost cruel matter. Havre remained calm on the outside, but the longer she stood by his side, the stronger a worrying feeling grew inside her stomach. They must have been in the elevator for less than a minute before it stopped calmly and the door opened again. They stepped out into a large hallway. Its cross-section was in the form of a large hexagon. The panels which it was lined with looked like neverending black mirrors, parted in a symmetrical order with long led light strips. When Havre walked on the shiny floor, she could see her own reflection in the side walls. At the end of the corridor, there was another door and an embranchment leading into two dark passways. 

‘Leave.’ The man ordered and the stormtroopers let go of Havre and headed back to the elevator. The man grabbed her arm and led her to the door. Havre abruptly felt something powerful in the air; so powerful that everything she was suddenly seemed minor and weak, as if it never mattered. She then realized that the worry she felt in the elevator must have been caused not by the man next to her but by something that was behind that door... The man's grip on her arm tightened as the gate opened. Havre raised her head and a frightening chill came down her spine.

Before her was an enormous, dark throne room. From where they were standing, a long bridge stretched out that led to a round platform held up by three giant metal columns that went up and met above it. The walls surrounding the platform were blood-red, and were so high, Havre couldn’t see the end of them. In the center of the round platform, lit up by dim white lights, stood a massive metal throne, and on it sat a tall human-looking man. 

‘Master.’ The man spoke.

‘My faithful apprentice…’ a low, howling voice echoed loudly across the room. The apprentice pulled Havre’s arm and brought her through the bridge onto the platform. They stopped a couple of meters before the throne. Now Havre could clearly see the man sitting in front of them. He was about seven feet tall, his skin was pale and wrinkled. He had a small dreadful face that looked distorted, like it had been pulled apart and put back together in a different order onto a much larger head. It was now stretched in an evil and sadistic smile. 

‘You did well...’ he spoke. His voice was ice cold and felt like it was powered not by a breath, but by some dark strange energy. It was alluring and repulsive at the same time. The man let go of Havre’s arm, pushing her down so aggressively, she fell to her knees. 

‘If it isn’t Havre, the third sister of the Descendants of the Black Star.’ the man sitting on the throne stared her down and she couldn’t help but look at the ground. The energy coming from him was unyieldingly powerful, pinning her down like a fly. ‘Turned into a slayer and a traitor. Hoping for…’ he stopped and Havre felt a stinging sensation of him trying to reach inside her head. She resisted yet again, now pushing against him with all her strength. She heard a grunt coming from the throne and then a command.

‘LEAVE US.’

A second of silence, which seemed like hesitation, and then a sound of the man’s footsteps leaving the room. Havre waited. She was too exhausted to do anything else. She hadn’t eaten or drunk anything for more than a day and her whole body was in pain. There was nothing more she could’ve done but wait for the man to finally kill her. 

‘Tracking you down was not easy.’ he said. ‘If it weren’t for the trackers you triggered when leaving Mustafar I might’ve never found you… But why is that…’ He stood up from the throne, holding onto the edge of the seat. He was tall, but looked somewhat fragile and moved slowly like an old man. ‘Why is that I, a master of all the Dark Force, trained and skilled above all, cannot reach inside of your small, stupid head?’ He approached her slowly. ‘I cannot sense your force movement… How are  _ you _ , a young, simply trained Sith skilled enough to fool  _ me _ . You committed an act vile enough to create a strong shift in the force… Then how come you didn’t?’

Havre remained quiet. 

‘You are nothing in skill and strength. Kadmûr reports on your progress were nothing above average. Where did you learn this? Answer me.’ He reached out his hand and his Force tightened painfully around her skull. 

‘I-I don’t know...‘ Havre let out. 

‘Don’t lie!’ he yelled. 

‘I…’ His grip tightened. Havre felt like it could break her head in two. ‘It came to me...!’ she cried and he let go.

‘Came to you?’ he asked, surprised, but then stopped as if he had realized something. He hesitated for a minute and then said. ‘Ah… That is indeed interesting…’ He turned around and walked back to the throne. ‘Did you expect me to find you?’

Havre suddenly realized something. If she was to stay alive, she must be careful with what she says. If he couldn’t see through her lies, if she is convincing enough she might have a chance... She sensed his force reaching into her head once again and this time, she only pretended to push him back, but then slowly let him in. She thought of something he would like to see. When sure that he could read it, she pushed him out, as if it was all her mistake. 

The man laughed with satisfaction. 

‘Not so powerful, are you now, Havre.’ he scoffed. ‘But I am impressed…’ he said, sitting back on the throne. ‘You fooled Kadmûr and was strong enough to resist me once… You truly are gifted. And so… you got what you wanted, didn’t you? You’re standing in front of me.’

He bought it. 

‘I desired to serve you…’ she said slowly. ‘But I heard Kadmûr considered recommending you the first brother… He was flawed, impersistent... rapid… I was always better than the rest. But Kadmûr had feared me. He felt like he couldn’t control me anymore, and he was right. This is no place for any of them...’

‘They were useful servants.’ Snoke cut her off. ‘Killing them proved you to be disobedient. I have no use for disobedient apprentices. So give me one reason why I shouldn’t get rid of you right here, right now.’ He grasped her throat with the force and pulled her up, two feet above the ground.

‘You’re the only master I could serve…’ she choked out. Her thoughts were running like crazy, trying to find anything to draw his attention. 

‘That doesn’t impress me…’

‘I have what  _ he _ doesn’t…’ she muttered with her last breaths. Snoke let go and she fell onto the ground. He was silent for a moment.

‘You…’ he drawled finally. ‘You think you can prove better than my apprentice?’ 

‘I know I can…’ Havre muttered. ‘His emotions… they control him.’ 

Snoke looked down at her and smirked. 

‘He could tear you apart in a second.’ he scoffed. ‘And you yet dare to undermine him… clever girl.’

‘I could serve you well… In places, he would fail. In places, any other Sith would… In places where they all could be manipulated.’

‘Stop speaking.’ Snoke drawled. ‘Your mind is powerful, but that is not what the strength of a Sith is built upon.’ Havre closed her eyes, ready for a verdict, and then his voice changed. ‘But…’ he started ‘you were determined enough to get to Hoth and wait for me. It is true that you could be of use to me.’ He stopped for a second. ‘In addition to Ren. If I spare you now, you will try to convince me you are more than subordinate, more than faithful. If I sense any resistance I _will_ destroy you.’

Havre opened her eyes slowly and looked at him.

‘I will not let you down, Master…’ Havre said strongly.

‘I have been looking for the one with your power… But if you shall fail, I won’t spare any second of your miserable life.’ he said and a smirk appeared on his face. ‘You will start your training tomorrow. I want you to be ready for any commands I give you. You might have been able to defeat Kadmûr, but that is not enough for me. You won’t be able to match Ren, but…’

‘I will do anything to be better than him.’ Havre said quickly and was met with a cold short scoff. 

‘You won’t be. But you will try.’

He waved his long hand in a quick temper and Havre heard the door opening. 

‘Take her to her quarters.’ 

A trooper in a silver-black uniform entered the room and Havre was told to follow him. She wasn’t able to look back at Snoke. His energy drained her and she was barely able to stand on her feet. 

The trooper walked her back to the elevator in silence and they drove it down for a few minutes. Havre felt at ease the farther she was from Snoke. They arrived at a level and stepped out in a corridor that was much less dark than the one leading to the throne room. It was short and had only three doors, two on one side and one on the other. The walls were of a calm grey color and the light was warmer than on other parts of the station. The trooper handed her a flat electric key pass and said:

‘This level is designated to you. You can lock the elevator and other doors with this key. In the other room, you will find your messenger droid.’ He nodded a quick goodbye and got back into the elevator. 

Havre walked up to the first door and looked at the key in her hand. When instinctively pressed it to a pad that was located on the side of the door. It worked and the blast gate slid to the side revealing a big sleeping chamber. It had a bed built into the wall, cabinet-panels, and a round table in the middle. On it, someone left a tray with three rations of food and a bottle of purple-colored drink. Havre threw herself on the meal, realizing just then how hungry and thirsty she was. Only when she ate it all to the last crumb and washed it down with the purple drink, she started to think a little clearer. Everything was still too bizarre for her to grasp. Only an hour ago she was certain she was on her way to die at the hands of the supreme leader… And now she was his apprentice? It just didn’t make any sense. She walked over to the door and decided to check what was in the other rooms.

When she entered the first one, she couldn’t make out what it was for the first few moments. It was an empty small room with a metal bed in the center of it. Havre walked over to it and just as she touched the bed’s cold surface the wall to her right and left opened in half, revealing hidden compartments, from which two small medical droids flew out and hung in the air above her. Similar ones were used by the Descendants, but these seemed to be newer in model. Havre lay her back on the table. The robots came in closer and started to work on her injuries. One of them, round-shaped with seven arms, each one ending with a different tool, cleaned her wounds, while the other one, equipped with various types of tubes, applied medications. Havre closed her eyes and stayed put, trying not to flinch at the stinging pain caused by the aid. Droids worked on her for over thirty minutes. They pulled apart what was left of her clothes and took care of even her old wounds and bruises from Hoth, when she only had painkillers and some old almost used up medications to treat them. When the robots were done, they went back into the compartments and in their place, a flat drawer slid out of the wall, with a row of blue painkillers. Havre quickly grabbed two and swallowed them in quick gulps. She then hovered back out of the room and opened the third, last door, behind which, as she expected, was a small bathroom, with a wide walk-in shower. She ripped off the rest of her clothes that the droids spared and quickly washed herself in cold water, careful not to mess up her stitches. When she was done, Havre covered herself with a towel and went back to the chamber. She couldn’t think of anything else but sleep right now. She passed out on the bed, letting herself drown in the static sound of led lights coming from the room. 


	5. The Apprentice

#  The apprentice

* * *

A weird beeping sound woke Havre from her sleep. She jumped up, surprised when she opened her eyes, seeing the unfamiliar room and it took her a few good moments to realize what had happened. The dark room was now lit up with a light that simulated daylight, but it still felt artificial, not even close to morning sunlight on Hoth. Havre looked around and saw that someone had left a new ration on the table. She got up and realized that she had been sleeping in her underwear. On the floor under her bed, she saw ripped parts of her old clothes that were cut when she was operated on by droids. 

‘Maybe they got me a uniform…?’ she said out loud and when she did, the same beeping sound that woke her up reached her ears. She turned around and saw a small black astromech droid standing by her bed. Havre walked up to it and leaned over to get a closer look. The robot was small, reaching maybe to half of her calf. It was built out of shiny black metal into the shape of a flat ball with a loose turning head, on which three circular lenses were placed. 

‘Must be the messenger droid…’ she muttered and the robot’s light turned green - a sign that it was ready for a command. ‘My clothes?’ she asked, not sure if the droid would even know how to react to this command, but it answered confirmigly and rolled passed her up to one of the wall panels. ‘Well, okay…’ Havre said and followed the droid. When she walked up to the wall, the robot pressed something on a button display, which Havre just noticed was on the side, and the wall slid open, revealing a built-in dressing room. Havre inhaled rapidly and took a step back when she saw what was inside. On the back of the small closet was a dark glass-case. Behind its window, hung a dark armor. Havre slowly walked up to the glass. It was made out of dark matte metal protectors on the chest, shoulders, arms, and knees put over a black aketon. Each one of the hand protectors, that went over a pair of black leather gloves, were armed with a small metal box Havre wouldn’t guess the usage of. From its pauldrons hung a large hood and above it a helmet with a mask that had a red glass over the part that covered the eyes. The armor was incredible and terrifying at the same time and it was... a perfect fit for Havre. She felt a sinking feeling in her stomach. “They have been waiting for me…” she thought. “But… since when?”

Trying to control her anxiety, she pushed that thought away for now. Under the glass-case, she found two buttons, one of them when pressed, opened a compartment with essential undergarment and a couple of regular black robes. When she pressed the other one, an empty stand slid out of the wall. 

‘Where are my sabers?’ Havre asked out loud and the messenger droid responded with a simple negative. ‘Oh, right, you’re here.’ Havre grabbed a fresh pair of underwear and one of the robes. ‘So… Where am I?’ She asked and the droid displayed a holographic map. Havre changed into the new clothes and looked at the map, whilst wrapping her robes around with a fabric belt.

‘What?’ She asked, shocked, and walked over to the map. ‘The Supremacy Ship?’ The droid beeped affirmatively in response. ‘Well… Actually that makes sense…’ She slid on her old shoes and sat at the table to open her ration. 

‘What time is it?’ she asked out loud with her mouth full of green dry crumbs. Droid beeped “5 AM” in response. 

Havre finished up her meal and left the room to go to the bathroom. When the blast door locked behind her, she finally felt somewhat focused. She walked up to the sink and looked into a small mirror hanging above it. Had to be a long time since she deliberately saw her own reflection. She brushed her dark hair with her fingers and she noticed with surprise that the injury on her head disappeared completely. She leaned closer to the mirror and began studying her face. There was no trace of the bruises or scratches, although her old scar that crossed her left cheek and chin was still there. Havre turned on the tap. She drew the cold water in her hands and splashed it over her face. She took a sharp breath and slowly let it out. 

‘What the hell is happening…’ she whispered to herself. Nothing made sense to her anymore. She began brushing her shoulder-length hair with a come she found under the sink. She retraced her steps back to Mustafar and thought about everything she had done, just to end up here, on the Supremacy, with her freedom once again corrupted once again by the Sith Order, by Snoke. She was in a position she was told to dream about when she was younger. “A chosen apprentice” as the legendary position was referred to by the monks on Korriban. But not really… She was by  _ the chosen one's _ side. And he was certain she was going to be killed by his master… But then again… They must’ve been waiting for her… She shook her head. It all happened too fast, and Havre suspected that from now on she would get solely orders and no explanations. ‘I have to get out of here…’ she said out loud, looking herself in the eyes. ‘No matter what it takes…’ 

It was late after 8 AM and nobody came for Havre, no message had been sent to the droid. She was locked out of the elevator, so she walked in circled through her new, comfortable prison, trying to piece together some kind of a plan. But not knowing how the Supremacy was built, how heavily it was guarded, or even where in the galaxy it was placed, she hardly had anything to go off. Slowly, she had to calm herself down into the realization, that, at least for now, she was in a completely hopeless position. She sat down on the ground and crossed her legs. With no options left, just like before, she decided to lean on the force. She felt a calming sensation pour over her body and she was left with nothing but rational thoughts in her head, that now felt like displayed in a white void. Havre remembered what she had told Snoke the day before when she begged for her life.  _ Overcoming his apprentice’s mistakes _ \- she would have to live up to that… At least for the time being, as she reckoned she would be closely watched at all times. In a strain of luck, she was able to fool Snoke once… But he didn’t trust her one bit. If he had planned her coming here, planned on her surrendering to his wishes, then he must have thought on how she would prove her obedience to him… A misgiving shiver crossed her back and she pulled her mind out of the void opening her eyes. 

The messenger droid was standing in the corner of the room and just as she stood up it let out a warning sound. 

‘Prepare myself for what?’ she asked and quickly proppered her robe. Seconds later she heard the elevator come down and then the blast door opening. 

‘Come with us.’ Two tall stormtroopers wearing black uniforms were standing in the door. Havre quietly followed them to the elevator. This time they didn’t put her in handcuffs, they weren’t even trying to grab her arms but held their blasters in a standby position. Havre thought about how quickly she could knock them both down, take their weapons and run… but knew it was pointless. And as if she needed a reassurement, they stepped out of the elevator onto a passage that forked in two corridors that passed a pentagonal gap between them. When she looked up and down, identical levels stretched across countless floors. On each one, she could spot two or more troopers, some walking in units, some guarding doors. They were thousands and thousands of them, an entire army. She was brought into a room that looked similar to the medical chamber in her quarters, but wider. It also had a small entresol few feet above the ground, on which two troopers were keeping guard. The ones that let Havre in left, locking the blast door on the way out. Havre was told to lay down on the metal table that stood in the center of the room, and she obediently did. For a few moments, she just laid there, in silence, trying not to seem stressed or concerned. “Whatever they’re doing, it must be a test…” she thought and pinned her eyes on the dark ceiling. Then, a medical droid appeared floating above her and she felt a sharp needle being rapidly thrust into her arm. She inhaled sharply, and closed her eyes, waiting for the pain from the sting to wear off, but as seconds went by it seemed to increase. After a minute, she could feel her whole arm cramping and the pain radiating into her chest. Havre began to feel nauseous. She looked up onto the entresol, and suddenly her eyes widened and a scream caught in her throat. She saw… HIM. A blood-eyed figure with horns all over his hands and head, the same red cloak, the same whip in his hand. Havre looked away in fear and suddenly realized she was somewhere else… inside her chamber on Mustafar, laying on the same bed she did before. She tried to move, but now her both hands were cramped in pain, paralyzed. She looked to her right and saw a grotesquely distorted face of the First Bother hung above her head, leaning closer and closer to the bed. 

‘NO!’ she screamed, but she couldn’t hear her voice. She closed her eyes shut and then heard a familiar scream in the distance… A scream of despair… The pain traveled down to her legs and Havre felt blood in her mouth from biting her tongue, as she tried to numb out the unbearable. She started to shake in spasm and she opened her mouth to beg for someone to just kill her… and then suddenly it all stopped. 

Havre gasped and jumped up from the table. Breathing heavily, she looked around and realized she was back inside the same empty medical room. She looked up at the entresol and saw that the figure had disappeared. 

‘You tried to prove yourself, I am impressed.’ A cold voice reached Havre and she immediately turned around, but nobody was there. The troops that stood on the entresol did not move. ‘You must be familiar with physical pain… Seems that Kadmûr had prepared you well… Must have been a great pleasure seeing him fall.’ Snoke’s voice echoed disturbingly in Havre’s head. ‘Stand up.’ He ordered and Havre quickly jumped up on her feet. ‘I sense a lack of passion inside of you, young Sith… Why is that? Do you think you have already achieved your position?’

‘No, master.’ she replied quickly. 

‘Good. Kill those guards.’ He ordered. Havre felt an immediate question on her lips, but she restrained herself. She looked around, examining the room, looking for something she could use. ‘Your lightsaber is not here.’ She heard. ‘A true Siths powers lay inside of their control over the force. You may be able to control yourself, but how weak do you stand without passion in you.’

Havre closed her eyes. Passion was a distant feeling, one that faded away the second she realized she saw no future in the Sith Order, once she saw how chaotic it was. She realized that on Hoth and the force had changed for her forever. She knew she needed it now and feared once again it would leave her once she would try to control it. 

‘Don’t think.’ Snoke hissed. ‘Do as I say.’

“The force is around me…” Havre thought calmly. “There is no control over it without control over yourself, Havre pull yourself together…!”. Hesitation left her at once and Havre opened her eyes, seeing things clearer. “Whatever it takes to get out of this…” She thought and reached out her hand towards the guards. She felt the energy around her warming, but she stayed as cold as ice, calm, concentrated. She grasped the trooper's neck from a distance and sharply started to strangle him. He let out a muffled cry and dropped his blaster on the ground. 

‘Hey!’ she heard the other one yell and she immediately reached out her right hand, stopping the laser, he shot towards her. It froze mid-air with a sizzling sound as if it burned the air around it. The first guards fell to the floor, letting out his last breath. Havre noticed his partner trying to call for backup and she waved her hand, pushing him against the wall and let out the frozen laser into his helmet. 

‘You were too slow.’ She heard Snoke's growling voice inside her head. ‘Go through the door. Remain unnoticed and come to me.’

‘Yes, master.’ she said and walked up to the blast door. “To be unseen or unheard is not about hiding. When a Force user turns invisible it is because they are confident that nobody around him could see through their manipulation. It is about blending your energy with others so well, that no one can tell the difference.” She remembered this lesson being taught in Korriban quite clearly. It was a day Havre first learned a skill that came from the force that wasn’t a weapon. They hadn’t learned much more of those, as the older she got, the less she needed them. At age sixteen she was able to assassinate three bounty hunters on her own, she didn’t have to hide from anyone. But that was when she still believed her path led to the Sith Order. 

She calmly stepped outside. Invisibility fit her like a glove, although being confident that none of the troopers would sense her force was quite an easy task. She hurried through the crossing, passing through a large troopers formation. None of them seemed to even realize she was there. With a wave of her hand, she summoned the elevator and waited a few seconds before it pulled up and she walked in. It was empty inside, but before she could close the door, two troopers and a third unmasked man walked in. Havre pressed her back to the wall. 

‘Confirm the ships depart to me directly.’ The man without a stormtroopers suit wore a charcoal grey uniform crossed with a polished buckle and wore a crested command cap emblazoned with the insignia of the First Order over his perfectly slicked-back red hair.

‘Yes, general.’ said the trooper standing to his right. Her armor was made out of shiny metallic protectors and had a crossed red-black cape over her shoulder. “An officer.” Havre thought. 

‘And make sure to demote 045A, she was a waste.’ The general added and his lips crooked with dissatisfaction. ‘I won’t tolerate waste on my bridge.’

The elevator slowed down and the three of them walked out. Havre quickly locked the door and the elevator started going down. And again, the further it got, the stronger Havre felt the dark energy of Lord Snoke. She had to remind herself to stay focused and not get distracted and not mind the sickening anxiety growing inside her stomach. The elevator finally stopped and she took a step on the black-shiny floor, the first one without any guard. She walked quickly towards the blast door that led to the throne room. She raised her hand to open them, but stopped suddenly and strained her hearing. 

‘I will not have you question my methods, Ren.’ she heard Snoke say. His voice was low and angry. 

‘Tell me why are you doing this.’ she didn’t recognize the second's man voice. 

‘Restrain yourself. Your training has not yet been completed.’

‘Supreme leader, I don’t…’

The door opened suddenly before Havre and for a second she stood there startled. 

‘Come.’ She heard Snoke’s voice and she slowly walked onto the bridge that separated the entrance from the throne platform. She looked over at the man that stood before the Supreme Leader and she saw just a glimpse of dark hair and a pale face before he put on his mask. Havre recognized the first apprentice. 

‘At last, you’re here.’ Snoke muttered and Havre knelt before him on one knee. 

‘Master.’ 

‘You have met my apprentice, Kylo Ren.’ Snoke said and waved his hand as a signal for Havre to stand up. She looked over at the man, but he hadn’t moved. ‘Starting from today I will be training both of you.’ Ren turned his head away from Snoke and Havre looked up. ‘The Sith Order has been following the same pattern for too long… Lord Sidious's plan failed because of it and now… As times change, we must adapt. Both of you are… unpredictable… But in obedience to me… I will make use of it to secure the New Order once and for all.’ he put on a crooked smile. ‘Now… Both of you will await my orders and train until I give them to you. Do you understand?’

‘Yes, master.’ Havre said. Kylo seemed to be hesitant but then bowed his head and said:

‘Yes, Supreme Leader.’ 

‘Havre’ Snoke turned to her and once again Havre felt him trying to enter her mind. She was prepared for that this time and let him in easily, as if to show she had nothing to hide. She thought about pride and Snoke seemed to be pleased. 

‘Yes, Master?’

Snoke waved his hand and from the shadow of his throne, a hooded figure dressed in a blood-red cloak appeared, carrying something in its hands. Havre straightened her back as the figure approached her and kneeled in front of her holding up what turned out to be her two sabers intricately wrapped in a scarlet silk fabric. 

‘As of now, you shall yield them in a new purpose.’ Snoke said as she took the cold metal hilts in her hands. ‘You are no longer an assassin, Havre the last Descendant, a second of the new warriors, the beginning of the New Sith Order.’

Havre suddenly felt familiar energy go through her as she grasped her lightsabers, it was like a distant memory, a bad memory… she bowed her head. 


	6. Training

# 

#  Training

* * *

The Supremacy ship traveled in the Imperial parts of the Galaxy but never stayed in one place for too long. Surrounded by an entire fleet of other star destroyers, it resembled an impregnable fortress. From each window stretched out the same, dark void punctuated by distant stars and Planets. Havre had never been on a starship this huge. It was an entire militarian city, a so-called Capital of the First Order. Havre had heard about it as a place where a new world was built from scratch, a place that would set an example to annexed planets. However, this tale of children being brought up in peace and with new, improved morals, of people working side by side with the army to create a new, better world… That was nowhere to be seen. Of course, Havre knew that the First Order was still at war and were never fooled that whatever propaganda he shared, Snoke had never believed in peace, but still… The Supremacy was much emptier than what she had expected. Filled to its limits with people, but still empty. 

Havre pressed a button on a wall and opened the closet. She inhaled slowly, seeing her silhouette reflecting in the glass-case with her new armor. She opened it and took it out carefully. It was heavier than she had expected. She threw it onto the bed and traced her fingers over the cold, metal protectors. 

‘The New Sith Order…’ she muttered under her breath. ‘Whatever that means…’

Havre stripped out of her robes and put on the tight overall aketon. The fabric was soft on the inside, comfortable and breathable, but rough and on the outside. She strapped two girdles with lightsaber attachments on her thighs and connected them to the belt on her waist. Then came on the metal chest protectors, over which she put the pauldrons. Lastly, she slid her hands into the leather gloves and put on the rest of the protectors on her arms and legs. 

Havre felt a strange feeling in her throat when she took the last piece in her hands - the helmet. Descendant never wore anything like this, nor they had an armor as strong… 

Havre inhaled as if she feared she wouldn’t be able to breathe inside of the helmet, before sliding it over her head. When she exhaled, she heard that her breath sounded distorted, similar to how Ren's voice was. Now, through the glass covering her eyes, the room was drowned in a garish red tint. She looked over at the window and saw her reflection over the dark space void stretching outside. 

Her heart skipped a beat. She had never seen herself looking so intimidating, yet so… anonymous. She felt strangely comforted by that fact as if she was now not only mentally but physically closed off from the world. 

The day before she was told to show up at the training center on the southern part of the 04 level. Havre memorized the directions from a map displayed by her messenger droid and left her quarters sometime before 5 AM to be there earlier. She had this habit from her days at Mustafar - any time training alone was worth exploiting. 

She walked through the halls of the ship at a fast pace. Troopers jumped to the side to get out of her way, startled at the sight of another Sith Knight among them. Havre’s helmet was built in a way to not mute the surrounding sounds and she could clearly hear troopers whisper to each other about her. “That’s enough…” she thought and when she turned into another corner, she used the force to mask her presence. 

The training center was in a secluded part of the ship, locked out to the troops. Havre used the key she was given to open the blast door, behind which she found a dark, narrow hall with red light strips on the bottom part of its walls, leading to an opening of a large room. Havre walked out of the hall slowly looking around. It was evidently the training room. On the walls hung familiar equipment, such as magnetic spheres and panels, climbing joints, metal staffs, helmets for practice combat, and other Havre didn’t know the purpose of. She wondered why the equipment was even there if Ren was the only apprentice, but then supposed that there must have been others before him. He seemed to be young, probably just a few years older than her, and Snoke had been the Supreme Leader for over thirty years. Havre walked up to one of the walls, under which a wide control console was placed. She instinctively pushed one of the buttons and the wall before her that turned out to be a shutter, moved up, revealing a huge window, through which Havre saw an enormous training field. It must have been wider than the whole base on Mustafar. The room in which Havre was standing was located at a higher level than the ground of the field, but its ceiling was even higher. The whole length must have been about a hundred meters. Its walls were made out of panels, to which in some places parallel tiers were attached as climbing points. The bottom was partly laid out with black sleek tiles and partly covered in what looked like charcoal gravel. Havre looked down at the console and a white screen attracted her attention. When she touched it, a small holographic silhouette appeared in front of her and the screen displayed a set of choices. “Artificial combat training?” she thought and clicked one of the settings on the screen. A semi holographic life-size silhouette of a tall knight appeared on the training grounds. 

Havre went down the stairs that led to the lower level and slowly walked out into the grounds. The gravel crunched underneath her heavy boots, but the imposed enemy didn’t move at her sight, as if it was waiting for her to attack. Havre disattached her sabers, but didn’t draw them just yet. She carefully walked up to the holographic figure at about two meters distance. She ignited her sabers and at that signal, a staff appeared in the figure's hand and it positioned ready. Havre attacked first, twisting her sabers at the same time as jumping forward, in a way that when she reached the figure both of the sabers were in front of her. The figure blocked her strike with the staff and Havre pushed back and struck again, this time faster. The grounds filled with the sound of her sabers interfering with the hologram. It felt as if she was hitting glass. Havre was used to managing the force to her advantage in combat by sensing her opponent's next moves, but when fighting with a mindless figure, she was left with only her physical skills. It blocked most of her strikes, no matter how hard she hit it, it didn’t seem to back down. Havre was getting more and more frustrated and tired with every move she made and when the figure pushed her to the ground she let out a loud grunt of irritation. She quickly picked herself up and thinking fast she threw her saber up into the air and leading it with the force she jumped up to the figure and when it blocked her first strike, her second saber came down, piercing the figure's neck. The hologram glitched and then faded slowly. Havre caught her saber in the air and designited both of them, panting. 

‘How weak must have Kadmûr been for you to kill him?’ a low distorted voice sounded behind Havre. She turned around and saw Ren standing in the entrance of the grounds with his arms crossed. Havre didn’t answer and unbothered, attached her sabers to the straps around her thighs. ‘You really think putting on all that armor makes you a Sith Knight?’ he asked and Havre could sense a held back irritation in his voice. ‘You’re so weak… pathetic.’ he scoffed. ‘And you’re supposed to train by my side?’

Havre ignored him. That wasn’t the first time someone had undermined her. And yet, all of them ended up dead under her feet. She grinned underneath her mask. Ren seemed to be irritated by her lack of response, but held back any words that he had on the tip of his tongue, because Havre turned on the artificial enemy program once again. The same figure she had just defeated appeared in front of her and she drew her lightsabers once more.

Ren watched her movement from afar. 

‘You think too much!’ he yelled over the sound of her saber’s strikes. Havre turned her back at him, trying to focus on her movement. ‘You’re too slow! Did you already forget everything from the academy?’

Havre tried to control her anger that built up with every word that Ren let out to distract her. She ducked her opponent's blow and jumped up over it to strike into his back, but it was as fast as her and blocked her saber with it’s staff. 

‘You’re not going to win cold-headed!’ Ren stepped closer to them. ‘That’s not how this works.’

Havre let out a sharp breath, pressed her lightsaber against the opponent’s staff, and threw her saber in the air to perform the same maneuver she did before, but suddenly Ren took out his hand and pulled it towards him. Havre immediately jumped back from the figure and pulled on the other side of her saber. It hung in the air between them, as they both reached out their hands. 

‘Let go.’ Havre drawled and pulled harder. 

‘You better focus on your opponent.’ he scoffed and Havre without turning or looking away put out her other hand and pushed back the figure with such force that it crashed onto the paneled walls, glitched and finally faded away, defeated. 

‘Let go of my saber, Ren.’ She said slowly and after a moment of hesitation he did so. The lightsaber flew through the room into her hand. She turned off both of the weapons and attached them back onto the straps. 

‘Was that supposed to be impressive?’ Ren asked when Havre started walking towards the gate. When she passed him, Ren grabbed her arm and forcefully stopped her. ‘We’re not done yet.’ he said. They were standing close to each other, but both in masks couldn’t see each other’s faces. Havre was just a few centimetres shorter than him, but Ren was powerfully built, his shoulders were twice as wide as hers. 

‘Then go ahead with your training.’ she said calmly. ‘Or did you come here only to prevent me from practicing?’ Havre felt his anger filling him inside.

‘Listen here, I don’t know why Snoke didn’t kill you but if you think you can match me in any way, you’re wrong and you’ll find out just how much.’ he blurted out. ‘You’re not supposed to be in this position and you’re gonna regret it. This is no place for someone like you.’

‘Let go of me.’ Havre broke out her arm from his grip and took a step back. ‘You make me sick.’ she turned around and walked out of the training grounds. Ren didn’t follow her. When she stepped inside the hall where training equipment was held, she looked back through the glass wall. Ren didn’t pay attention to her anymore. He turned on the program again and three same holographic figures surrounded him. Havre stood by to watch him fight and then her stomach sunk. In a blink of an eye, he managed to defeat two of the opponents with his saber, at the same time pushing the third one onto the wall. The man was far more powerful than she had imagined. Anger and passion feeding his skills were so strong that could certainly top all five of the Descendants. 

Havre turned around and hurried back to her quarters, this time not caring if the troops noticed her. When the blast door of her chamber closed behind her she shoved the helmet off of her head and dropped it to the floor with a loud sound. It rolled over to the wall and Havre had to stop herself from smashing it with her feet. A realization came over her so powerfully she couldn’t avoid it anymore. 

‘Why am I so weak…?’ She whispered. ‘Ever since Hoth I am…’ She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. ‘Don’t panic…’ she muttered and with another breath, she inhaled tried to focus. She had to evaluate herself. 

She was no longer a Sith Knight inside. She thought the Descendants were flawed… and so is Kylo Ren. But he takes power from his flaws… he is unable to control himself and that is why he is so strong in the force. 

So what is the thing that would drive  _ her _ ? 

She remembered the Sith oath she took on Korriban:

_ Peace is a lie. There is only Passion. _

_ Through Passion, I gain Strength. _

_ Through Strength, I gain Power. _

_ Through Power, I gain Victory. _

_ Through Victory my chains are Broken. _

_ The Force shall free me. _

She found out pretty soon after that there was no freedom in the way she was brought up to be. She was attached to something she had no desire to participate in, to something she could truly gain nothing from. She let go of her passion - to gain back control. She had no interest in power itself, the only victory to her was if she would be free of anyone else’s influence and mastery. And so she became stronger with the force. Stronger than Kadmûr, stronger than the other Descendants, and in a way even stronger than Kylo Ren. But a stronger mind did not mean a stronger body and Havre didn’t want to admit that to herself for a long time, but now… She was in danger and she was weak. It was time to find a way to gain power without passion, without rage and fear. In her own way, just like always. 


	7. Defense

#  Defense

* * *

The longer Havre had been on the Supremacy, the darker and colder it seemed. She avoided leaving her quarters as much as it was possible, as she felt just a bit better when she was alone. Snoke hadn’t sent for her or contacted her since the day she was given her lightsabers, but his energy could be felt everywhere, causing her to feel anxious almost every day. Meditating started to get more and more difficult, while she couldn’t always bring herself to focus. But Havre stayed committed. 

She set her messenger droid to wake her up every day before 5 AM and she took an hour to set her emotions straight before entering the training grounds. For some reason unknown to her, for the entire two weeks, Havre didn’t see Ren. Not on the training grounds, or even walking around the Supremacy. She thought it was fortunate, having the time to practice alone and she didn’t wonder what he was doing or where he was. But even though she didn’t deliberately think about Ren, the image of his creepy mask would sometimes appear in her mind, disturbing her focus. Of course, for all her life she had to deal with people like Ren, cruel and self-indulgent maniacs, but something about him just made her angrier than anybody ever did. Even more than the First Brother, and that Havre thought would never be possible. Ren became the focal point of all her frustrations. Not only was he the one that kidnapped her from Hoth and brought her into this nightmare, but he also showed her how powerful he is, being everything she despited. She had to prove she was better, whilst not giving in to her emotions, as he did. If only for her own protection. 

But it wasn’t easy.

She thought the only thing she would need to do is focus, but it turned out to be not enough to surpass pure physical strength. She then tried to put her focus into her arms and put enough force into it that it would imitate a sort of aggression, but that turned out to be just simply impossible.

It was the fourteenth day of her training. She struggled to get up from the ground, after yet again failing to defeat the holographic enemies. She had no problem winning in one-on-one training, but when put before two or more, she would lose almost every time. Neither less, She forced herself to turn on the simulation again. She felt sweat coming down her neck and she took a deep breath. Trying to hold her emotions on the leash was harder than ever before. 

Yet again, the holographic simulation projected two, exact same figures on two opposite ends of the grounds. At once Havre felt all of her determination fleeting. She closed her eyes and admitted that there is no possible way for her to overcome this... No matter how many hours or days she would spend practicing, her attacks weren’t going to get stronger. Either she would submit to her anger and emotions, like Ren, or she was left with…. self-defense. She sensed the figures coming in closer into an attack. She was Helpless, tired, frustrated… weak? “No.” she thought “I am not weak… I am in control. That is the only thing that matters. If I can’t control  _ my emotions, _ anyone could control  _ me _ .” Havre lifted her lightsabers and took a defensive position. She opened her eyes and saw the two figures heading towards her. Havre stood her ground, didn’t move, didn’t attack. The figures came in closer and drew their staffs. Havre was focused, calm. The first figure swung the staff over her head and Havre blocked it instantly. And then without even looking back, deflected the attack from the second figure. Havre noticed something strange. The figures were moving evidently slower than before. She was easily blocking their strikes, without even moving her feet. The first figure pounced on her with all its might, but it was such an obvious blow, that Havre immediately dodged it. It went on like this for a good minute before Havre suddenly realized… it wasn’t the figures that were moving so slow…  _ She was twice as fast as them. _

At once It felt as if some type of block inside of her had resolved. With a swish of her saber, she knocked one of the figures' staffs out of their hands and thrusted the second one into their chest. The other one tried to attack her from behind and she bowed her head. As the staff pierced the air above her back, she thrusted both of her sabers backwards and heard the familiar glitch of the hologram deactivating. 

Havre stood in the middle of the grounds for a good minute trying to get a hold of what had just happened and when a realization skimmed her mind she looked up and saw a dark silhouette of Kylo Ren standing behind the glass window in the upper level. Havre could sense his eyes behind the mask were on her, but she was still too struck to react in any way. 

‘Snoke is expecting us.’ He said after the brief silence. Havre could hear his voice through telepathy. 

‘Fine.’ she responded after a second of hesitation. She disignited her sabers and left the training ground to join him in the elevator. They stood in silence for a long moment. Being in such a small room with him before would make her anxious, but after what had happened on the training grounds she felt more confident. She turned her head slightly to look at him. He was standing with his back straight and his head held high.

‘Why does Snoke want?’ She asked. He didn’t answer right away. The elevator stopped at the mid-level and he walked out so quickly that Havre had to run up to him. 

‘Is that how you usually talk about your masters?’ He said as in response to her question. Incredible how just those few words were enough to remind Havre how irritating Ren still was. 

‘It was a simple question.’ She responded. They were walking hand in hand in a narrow corridor, and troopers had to literally jump out of their way. 

‘You really have the nerve to be stubborn, huh.’ 

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ 

They stopped in front of the blast elevator doors. 

‘I told you already.’ Ren looked at her directly.

‘This is not a place for you. You should show me some respect if you’re not showing it to Snoke.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Havre really had no idea what he meant and she had to try to keep her anger inside. Ren leaned in closer as if he wanted to say something, but before he could, the blast door slid open and a man stepped out and stopped before them. They both looked over at him irritated, and Havre recognized the red-haired general she saw earlier. Ren straightened up. 

‘General Hux.’ He said. The man looked first at Havre then at Ren.

‘Ren.’ he said shortly and his eyes narrowed. The Supreme Leader is waiting.’ He stated and looked over at Havre one last time before he passed them and walked away with a quick, stiff step. Havre and Ren walked into the elevator without a word. The door closed and it started going down. Havre closed her eyes. She gathered her strength, preparing to stand again in Snoke's presence and tried to let her irritation go. She thought how convenient it was that she had her mask on, for that Ren couldn’t see her face.

‘I was once where you stand.’ Ren said, not looking at her. ‘You’re not made for this.’ 

Havre frowned, squeezing her eyes shut. 

‘You won’t last.’ he said, lowering his voice. ‘But I’m impressed you’re trying so hard…’ Havre felt the tension from Snoke’s energy clenching all around her and it seemed to be provoking Ren even more. ‘So tireless… So determined…’

Havre felt like she was going to lose her temper at any second. 

‘I bet it makes you so angry…’ Ren leaned closer to her and Havre had to clench her fists to control herself from pushing him away. ‘So frustrated…’

Havre took a sharp breath and at last, the elevator stopped. She waved her hand to open the door quicker and walked out pushing Ren with her shoulder. 

Snoke was, as always, sitting on the throne. Havre walked in first, not waiting for Ren. He joined her before Snoke shortly after. The Supreme Leader took a moment before he addressed them and Havre used it to calm down and focus. She couldn’t let Snoke see how on edge Ren got her. 

‘How is your progress, Havre?’ he asked. His voice echoed in the large chamber.

‘Well, Supreme Leader.’ Havre answered shortly and let her mind open.

‘Good. I sense you got stronger.’ he said and looked at her with something of a satisfaction in his dark eyes. ‘Have your wounds healed?’

Havre nodded. 

‘Good.’ He straightened upon his throne and looked down at them. I’m sending you to Jedha. We established the Jedi's location on the north part of the moon.’ 

Havre couldn’t help but look up, startled. “The Jedi...?” 

‘Do you want me to kill him?’ Ren asked.

‘No. I want you to bring him alive. I believe he has been in contact with the resistance.’ Snoke's eyes narrowed. ‘And you’re both going.’ he emphasized. ‘The Jedi has been able to hide from me for too long, he is strong with the force, but it seems he’s weaker now. But you won’t take any troops. If he notices you before you get to him, we'll probably lose his trail again. Don’t fail me.’ 

‘Yes, sir.’ Ren and Havre said in unison. 

‘Good. Don’t waste any more time.’

Havre bowed her head and turned around to walk out of the room. Ren followed her. She tried to stay as far from him as she could, but they both had to take the same elevator.

‘Stay away from me.’ she muttered as soon as the blast door closed.

‘That’s going to be a problem if we’re both going on the same ship.’ he said, mockingly.

Havre ignored him and turned her head the other way. 

They stepped out into the hangar, to which the elevator led directly and Havre followed Ren to the starship. It was a one-pilot TIE silencer, similar in size to the Skipray, but that’s where the similarities stopped. The Silencer was easily the best-manufactured starfighter in the hangar. The cockpit with a large red sensor window was placed in between two, long triangular wings, each equipped with a laser cannon. When Havre looked closely she noticed that most of the ship was built out of solar panels. 

‘Isn’t this a one-pilot model?’ Havre asked, when Kylo hopped on the ladder on the side of the ship. 

‘What, is your idea of not getting spotted taking a star destroyer with you?’ He scoffed and opened the hatch on the top of the ship. Havre sighed and stepped on the ladder. When she slid down into the cabin, Ren was already sitting in the pilot seat and preparing for take-off. Havre looked around and spotted a small passenger seat on the sidewall of the ship, behind Ren. She let out a sigh of dissatisfaction. 

‘You didn’t think you were going to pilot the ship, did you?’

Havre ignored him and fastened her seatbelts. Ren disabled the safety straps and turned the engine on. 

‘Departure permission granted.’ a voice came out of the radio. Ren picked up the ship and smoothly navigated it from the dock. Havre clicked on the latches of her helmet and when the lock drew out, she slid her head out of it. She looked at the back of Ren's neck. “He never takes his off, does he…” She thought, straightening her matted hair. She looked outside the red-tinted window as they left the Supremacy. “How the hell did I end up here…” she thought to herself as the ship flew up, entering hyperspace. 


	8. The Holy Moon

# 

#  The Holy Moon

* * *

Havre slowly opened her eyes and looked around. 

‘Good, you’re awake.’ She heard Ren’s distorted voice coming from the pilot’s seat. ‘We’re about to land.’ Havre looked above his shoulder and saw the place they were heading towards. She blinked in a stupor. 

The unimaginable view that lay before their ship, Havre had never seen anything like this. The moon was fractured, as if a meteor had hit it in the northern hemisphere leaving an enormous crater and distorting the sphere’s shape forever. The torn pieces of its surface, still floated around its atmosphere, creating an asteroid field. Yet despite such destruction, from afar Jedha looked peacefully beautiful

‘What is this?’ She couldn't help but ask, amazed by the view.

‘It was once the Jedi’s sacred place. The Empire destroyed its capital in the First War.’ Ren answered and Havre could sense a weird satisfaction in his voice. ‘It has been abandoned for centuries. Do you even know who the Jedi were?’

‘The Force Users manipulated by the Republic, I know.’

‘Is that what they taught you?’ asked Ren, strangely surprised by her answer. ‘Well, it isn’t far from the truth…’

‘What truth?’ She asked but suddenly Ren dropped the ship down and if not for the seatbelts, Havre would have been thrown into a wall.

‘Asteroids.’ A short explanation came from the command seat. 

Ren turned out to be an excellent pilot. Havre was truly amazed at how quickly he moved the ship in between the rocks, smoothly avoiding a crash with even the smallest particles. She thought that maybe after all it was a good idea that he got to pilot the starship. Finally, they passed the asteroid field and approached the moon’s atmosphere. Ren prepared the ship for landing and Havre looked out the window, observing the remarkable view of the moon's surface as they got in closer. The enormous crater created by the destruction was surely bigger than some of the planets in the system. The inside of it, was an empty hollow plain, and on its sides, Havre saw piled up mountains of crashed debris that once used to form a city. Afar from the crater, stretched out a sandy desert scattered by meteors dispatched from the crash. It all looked like a tragedy frozen in time.

Ren landed the ship in the desert, far from the crater, and hid the ship between two boulders, in a way that it wouldn’t be visible from a distance.

‘ T ake this.’ Ren walked out of the cockpit and handed her a triangular-shaped Holocron. ‘It has his coordinates in it. And put your mask on.’ 

Havre wanted to say something back to him, but Ren already walked past her to open the hatch. She let out a sigh and put her helmet back on. “This is not going to be easy.” she thought, rolling her eyes, and followed Ren out of the starship. 

Jedhas climate was cold and windy, but Havre’s armor was built out of materials that adapted to even extreme temperatures. The mask also turned out to be necessary, as the wind blew up clouds of sand from the ground, which without proper cover would make it difficult to breathe or see properly. Havre used the Force to open the Holocron. Its walls lit up and twisted, unraveling a hidden holographic map inside. Ren immediately took it from Havres’s hand to get a closer look. 

‘It’s not far from here.’ he said, looking up at the horizon. ‘Somewhere near that mesa.’ he pointed to a distant tableland standing out on the plains. 

‘How are we going to take the Jedi back with us to the ship?’ Havre asked, quite amused by the image of them walking all the way back to the ship, dragging their prisoner behind. 

‘We’ll take the speeder.’ Ren turned to the ship and pulled on some mechanism beneath its chassis. The lower part of the starship dislocated and the cleverly constructed speeder slowly slid out, landing beside them. It was a low two-seater with an open roof. The panels on the speeder matched the ones on the starship. Ren leaned over the side and smoothly jumped onto the pilot’s seat. Havre sat next to him and Ren started the engine. He slowly maneuvered it out of between the meteors and finally set off into the empty desert stretching out into the horizon. The repulsorlift made a soft, hollow sound as they were speeding, raising clouds of dust behind them. 

‘Who is this Jedi?’ Havre asked, and looked over at Ren.

‘Do you always ask so many questions?’ he responded, looking straight ahead. 

‘You know though, don’t you?’ 

Ren let out an irritated sigh. 

‘His name is Cal Kestis.’ He started ‘He was one of the few Jedi that lasted throughout the wars. He’s a coward, like all of them’ he added with a scoff ‘he’s been running ever since the First Order destroyed most of the Republic. Until now.’ 

‘I thought all Jedi were dead.’ Havre recalled what she knew about Jedi Knights from her childhood at Korriban. 

‘Well, that’s the last of them.’ 

Havre looked over at the Holocron, which laid on the control panel next to Ren. The target was close. She scanned the desert that stretched before them. There was no sign of a village, or even a camp anywhere. They approached the large mesa and Ren slowed down. He parked the speeder next to the rock wall and they got out. When Havre’s feet touched the ground she felt a strange shiver come down her spine. She looked around, but nothing stood out. Ren seemed to be unbothered, or it was what Havre assumed, as she couldn’t see his face. He took the Holocron and looked up at the mesa. Havre followed his gaze and saw that up in the wall of the tableland, there was a row of strange carved out signs, Havre didn’t recognize. 

‘There must be a way inside.’ He said and started walking along the wall. 

‘A way inside where exactly?’ Havre asked, irritated, and ran up to him. 

‘This place was used by the Jedi. They might have built something inside.’ 

Havre decided not to ask how Ren knew this, but sure enough, as they approached the corner of the mesa, before them appeared an astonishing view. In front of the tableland, partly immersed in the desert sand stood five, huge rock statues of man and woman in cloaks. Their heads, facing down were covered by large hoods and Havre couldn’t see their faces. Two of them were holding what appeared to be a staff or a saber, one other held an unraveled scroll with strange symbols carved out in it, the fourth one held two identical orbs, and the last one had its hands empty, reaching out to the mesa. Havre felt the same strange shiver on her shoulders and quickly turned her head away from the statues. The tablelands wall was completely blank, apart from a big, carved out circle on the bottom of it. Ren, who seemed to be unbothered by the statues, walked past them and approached the sign on the wall. Havre followed him, forcing herself not to look at the mysterious monuments. Ren put his hand on the wall and tried to push it using the Force, but it wouldn’t back down. He tried again, harder, but nothing happened. He stepped back, resigned, and looked at the Holocron.

‘Strange. This should be the place...’ He said, looking around for a different entrance. Havre suddenly felt a strange impulse. Ignoring Ren, she stepped before him in front of the circle. ‘It doesn’t work.’ Ren told her, but she didn’t listen. She put both her hands on the wall and felt a rush of Force coming through her. The weird feeling on her shoulders got stronger and slowly, the circle wall yielded. With a howling sound, it moved inside the mesa revealing a long, dark corridor. 

‘How did you do that?’ Havre heard Ren’s voice on her back. 

‘I…’ she hesitated. She truly didn’t know. It was an impulse, as if somebody was telling her what to do. ‘I used one of Kadmûrs techniques.’ she lied. Ren stepped into the corridor, and sent her a long look, when walking past her. Havre stood still in the entrance for a brief second, looking into the darkness of the corridor. A sudden doubt had grown upon her as if she was walking into a trap. 

‘Let’s go.’ Ren's voice from inside the hall brought her back to reality. ‘What are you waiting for?’

‘Nothing…’ She answered and shook the anxious feeling off. She rushed after Ren, who disappeared in the dark hall. Havre drew one of her sabers and held it above her head as a source of light. But it only illuminated the way just a meter ahead and Havre minded her step, careful not to trip on the gravel. Ren also held his saber ignited and Havre saw its red-cross light glowing in the distance. After a while, the tunnel got even more narrow and Havre had to hold her saber close to her body, not to run across the walls with it. They must have been walking for over ten minutes already and Havre wondered how long could the pathway be. She looked behind her. The circle entrance wasn’t visible anymore. When she turned around she realized that Ren’s lightsaber disappeared. “The corridor must have a turn there…” she thought and continued walking. At this point, the tunnel was so narrow, that Havre had to literally squeeze her way through it. 

‘I hope this is all worth it…’ She said under her breath and as soon as she said that, the corridor suddenly widened and she stepped out into some larger space. She stopped in half a step and held her saber higher, to get a better look at where she was. She found herself in an empty small, square room carved out inside the corridor. When she walked across it, she realized that there was no other way out from it apart from the tunnel she walked out of. She once again felt an anxious feeling on her shoulders and looked from side to side. 

‘Ren?’ she asked slowly and her words echoed inside the room. “Where the hell did he go?” she thought. “Maybe I went the wrong way?”. She turned around to turn back to the hall and stopped, stupored. The wall behind her was gone. It just vanished, and instead, before her, appeared what looked like an underground lake. Its water was still and black. Havre couldn’t see its edges in the darkness, so it looked like it was never-ending. She took a few steps towards it, carefully and pulled out her second saber. 

‘Ren?!’ she yelled and her voice echoed and multiplied on the lake’s surface and when it faded away... Havre heard it coming back to her, as if someone was standing on the other side of the lake and repeating her words. 

‘Hello?!’ she yelled and took a step closer to the lake, squinting her eyes, trying to see what was hiding in the darkness. And this time, the word came back sounding not like “hello” but more like… her own name. Havre’s heart started beating faster. She tightened her grip on the handles of her lightsabers. She looked down at the lake’s surface and saw her own reflection. But it wasn’t really reflecting her… In the water’s mirror, though he was standing in the same position and moved the way she did, she didn’t have her mask on… She could clearly see her own, stupored face. Havre took a step back, scared by what she saw in the lake and suddenly a shrill scream pierced the air.

‘NOOO! LEAVE HER ALONE! NOOO! TENIEL!’ 

Havre didn’t recognize that voice, but something in her told her she had to help that woman. She jumped towards the lake and desperately tried to locate where she could be, but nothing in the pitch darkness moved. 

‘NOOO!’ The woman kept screaming and Havre suddenly realized, her voice was coming from underneath the water. Without thinking, she leaped towards the shore, but when she walked into the lake, the screams stopped as rapidly as they had started. Suddenly, the water began to bubble beneath her feet and ebbing, as if the lake was draining into a pit. In a matter of seconds, the land underneath her was dry, as if no water touched it in days. Havre looked around, anxiously, and impulsively started walking straight ahead. And then, she heard a different voice of a man yelling:

‘THEY’RE HERE! RUN! RUN!’ Havre picked up her pace, running towards the voice. She heard a scream of pain, as if the man was tortured. She started sprinting. She had to do something... ‘NO! NO! NOOO!’ the voices multiplied and became louder with every second, as if they were coming in closer, running along her side. ‘RUN! YOU HAVE TO RUN! RUN!’ Havre’s heart was beating twice as fast as before. The voices were now so loud, she couldn’t hear her own breath, as if dozens of people were screaming right into her ears. And then she saw a sudden light appear a few meters ahead and as she got closer, she saw that the light was coming from a fire that burned on two dead bodies…

‘No…’ she heard her own voice and suddenly the screams around her started chanting:

‘THEY’RE HERE! THEY’RE HERE! YOU CAN’T RUN!’ Havre rapidly turned around and saw a dark figure launching at her with a red lightsaber.

‘NO!’ She screamed and reached out her hand, pushing the silhouette with the force. It was so strong, that the figure flew through the air, crashing onto the grounds several meters away. Havre squeezed her eyes as hard as she could.

And at once, the voices fell silent.

She felt her anxiety fleeting, like it had been drained by the force. 

Havre opened her eyes again and saw that she was back in the hall in which she entered the mesa. But it wasn’t dark. There was sunlight coming through an opening at its end, and right there on the floor, she saw a man's body, and next to it a red cross lightsaber...

‘Oh my stars... Ren…!’ She ran up to him and kneeled next to his head. His mask was cracked from it’s back to the front. Havre quickly checked his pulse with her shaking hands and felt it, but it was weak. ‘Ren. Ren! Can you hear me?!’ 

She took the broken mask off his head and put a hand on his cheek. She shook it firmly.

‘Ren. Ren, come on.’ Her heart started beating faster, as he didn’t wake up. She instinctively put her hand on his chest. On Korriban as part of her training, she had learned how to gain vitality from animals and prey, and now she tried to do it in reverse with Ren. She closed her eyes and focused, reaching to the Force. ‘Come on…’ she muttered. She felt a tingling sensation of the Force leaving her fingers and she forgot about everything else, focusing on it moving through her body. ‘Please…’ 

After a short moment that felt like forever, she felt his chest beginning to move up and down faster, steadier... It worked. She opened her eyes and took her hands off his chest. Sweat running down her neck and she yanked the helmet off her head. ‘Ren. Can you hear me?’ 

His eyes slowly opened and Havre realized that it was the first time she has ever seen his face. It was more gentle and handsome than she had imagined. He looked young, but had visible wrinkles on his forehead and between his eyebrows. He had a big nose and full, pale lips, on which Havre noticed a small scar. Around it all, tangled long, black hair. He had dark circles around his eyes, and he was looking straight at her. 

‘What… What did you do…?’ he asked slowly. Havre heard his voice undistorted by his mask for the first time. It was surprisingly soft.

‘I…’ Havre suddenly remembered the lake and the voices. ‘I thought you were trying to kill me… Didn’t you hear all the screams?’

‘What screams?’ he asked, confused. ‘I heard you calling my name, but I couldn’t find you, where did you go?’ 

‘I-I don’t know… This place…’ She looked around. ‘There is something wrong with this place… I think the Jedi must have set some kind of traps or…’ she stopped. Ren slowly sat up, leaning on his forearms. He touched the back of his head and closed his eyes, grunting with pain. 

‘Are you okay?’ Havre asked.

‘Yes. We have to find him...’

‘Can you walk?’ She stood up and helped him get up on his feet. 

‘It’s fine.’ Ren picked up his lightsaber and looked up. They only then realized where they were standing. The corridor led to an opening of a large hall. Its ceiling went all the way up to the top of the mesa, in which three big windows were carved out, letting in the sunlight. On the yellow rock walls of the hall, were built in four levels with ornate entresols. On each floor were three to four doors. Some of them were open, as if someone had left them in a hurry. Four long, towering stone pillars entwined with dry ivy rose from the ground to support the ceiling. It all looked very old and run down, parts of the walls were completely dilapidated, blocking the stairs that led from one level to the other. Nothing else was there, no items, no furniture left behind. Could the Jedi be hiding in one of the rooms?

‘We should split up.’ Ren said and Havre nodded in agreement, but a glimpse of worry still lurked in her mind, as if she could still hear the echo of the voices from the strange chamber. ‘I’ll take the ground, and the first floor.’

‘Fine…’ she muttered. 

Ren collected the remains of his helmet and Havre watched him opening the first door. She took a deep breath of the sharp, cold air. “Get it together, Havre…” she thought and stepped on the stairs leading to the first floor. She carefully walked on the run down steps and reached the second level. She ignited her saber and walked up to the first door. She slowly opened them and looked inside, ready to react to every slight movement. But the chamber was completely empty. So was the second and third room. In the last one, Havre found some old rags piled up in the corner, before she could move them, she heard a voice behind her.

‘Are you looking for me?’ She immediately once again felt the same strange feeling on her shoulders and turned around, pointing her saber forward at the Jedi standing in front of her. He was an old gray-haired man, dressed in what appeared to be ragged robes and a poncho. 

‘Hands up.’ Havre ordered and the Jedi did as she said. ‘Turn around. REN!’ Havre yelled in the direction of the stairs. 

‘No need to call your friend, I won’t put up a fight...’ Havre searched his pockets, but found no weapons on him. She heard Rens fast, heavy footsteps on the staircase. ‘Hands behind your back.’ she ordered and the Jedi obediently listened to her commands. 

‘You got him?!’ Ren walked into the room with his saber ignited. The Jedi looked at him strangely.

‘So this is Kylo Ren… I’ve heard many things about you…’ Ren stared at the Jedi and Havre noticed that the old man's words seemed to infuriate him. 

‘I wouldn’t talk if I were you, Kestis.’ He said, drawing his words, and handed Havre force-wielding handcuffs. Havre tied the Jedi's hands behind his back and Ren pushed him out of the chamber, shoving him by the arm. The Jedi didn’t protest. 

They walked out of the mesa through the dark tunnel. Strangely, now it seemed to be a short, clear pathway. Ren put the Jedi in the back of the speeder and waved his hand firmly over the man's head. The Jedi fell limp on the seats. Havre quickly glanced at Ren.

‘He’s just unconscious.’ Ren muttered and got in the front of the speeder. ‘Come on.’ 

They drove back to the ship in silence. Havre felt strange. She tried not to think about what happened in the mesa and not look bothered in front of Ren, but he also seemed to be deep in his own thoughts. 

When they got to the ship, he carried the Jedi into the cockpit and locked him inside the small cargo compartment next to the engine. When Havre sat in her seat, she only then felt how tired she was and when they took off out of the moon’s atmosphere, she closed her eyes, trying to get her thoughts straight. She knew she wouldn’t feel any more relieved once they were back at the Supremacy with Snoke.

When they arrived at the hangar, The unconscious Jedi was taken from their hands by a squad of armed troopers. Havre and Ren headed to the throne room in silence. Havre felt that he was acting a little off as if he was calmer than before, but she thought that maybe it was the absence of his mask that seemed to make him different. Whatever it was, she just felt relieved that he didn’t try to bother her again. 

When they entered the throne room, Snoke was talking to the red-haired General Hux. The man was standing straight like a matchstick, with his hands behind his back, and talked in a high pitched voice - Havre found it slightly amusing for some reason. 

‘No sir,’ Hux stated shortly. ‘The base was attacked during the transportation, but they managed to retract most of the supplies…’

‘I don’t think I have to make clear to you, General how pathetic that sounds.’ Snoke was angry. Havre could feel his heavy energy all around the room. ‘I want their villages destroyed by the end of the night. We won’t take prisoners. Make them an example if they are so brave…’

‘Yes, Supreme Leader.’ Hux muttered quickly, bowed his head, and turned around on his heels. Havre saw a shadow of fear on his pale face when he passed her, staring down at the floor. 

‘I hope you’re bringing good news for me.’ Snoke addressed them when they stopped before his throne. 

‘The Jedi is ready for interrogation.’ Kylo reported.

‘Good.’ Snoke said approvingly and a cruel smile appeared on his face. ‘We’re getting closer to the capital of the rebellion…’ He muttered with satisfaction. ‘We’ll put the Jedi to starve before you'll bring him to me… I want him to suffer before I’m done with him…’ Snoke said slowly and then looked at Ren curiously ‘What happened to your mask?’ he asked. 

Ren didn’t reply right away. Havre felt her stomach sink and she pointed her eyes on the ground. If he tells him the truth, she would have to show Snoke everything that happened in the mesa… Otherwise, he would accuse her of betrayal...

‘The Jedi.’ Ren said shortly and Havre felt her heart skip a beat. He lied… Why did he lie…?

‘Well… If he put all that effort into hiding, I didn’t expect him to give in without a fight…’ Snoke scoffed. ‘But that would be his last one.’ He paused and shifted in his seat ‘And you two should rest for now. You did well.’ 

‘Thank you, Supreme Leader…’ Havre and Ren bowed and walked out into the corridor. When the door of the elevator closed behind them, Havre curiously glanced at Ren. His head was high, eyes locked straight on some point on the wall before him. He looked as if he didn’t want to acknowledge Havre’s presence at all. “How is he so calm all of a sudden?” Havre thought back to the day he nearly provoked her to her limits. She opened her mouth to ask him something, but before she could, the elevator stopped and Ren walked out the blast door without a word of goodbye. Havre hesitated for a few seconds, before she jumped out of the elevator at the last moment before the door closed. She looked to her right, where she saw Ren heading and suddenly, she felt a familiar shiver on her shoulders. She turned her head the other way and at once her gaze was met with a stare of two deep blue eyes. The Jedi, escorted by two stormtroopers, walked on the other side of the corridor, looking straight at her. She saw it, like it was in slow-motion… The old man’s eyes narrowed and suddenly, inside her head, she heard his voice.

‘I know who you are.’ 

Havre’s mouth opened, partly with shock, partly because she wanted to say something back to him, but the prisoner and the stormtroopers disappeared behind a blast door. 

Havre stood in place, petrified for a minute. Her heart was pounding and she didn’t know why. What did he mean by that? How did he know who she was?


	9. The Beginning

#  The Beginning

* * *

Havre lay awake in her bed. It was 3 AM and she couldn’t be less relaxed. She thought back to everything that happened on Jedha. Whenever she closed her eyes, she was back in the dark corridor and she would hear the screams… the screams of people she’d never met, yet they seemed so familiar… And the Jedi… 

She sat up rapidly and pushed back the blanket from on her legs. She started walking around the chamber, trying to shake off the strange feeling she still got on her shoulders. Her messenger droid beeped in a polite question from the room’s corner.

‘No, I don’t need anything… I-’ Havre stopped in half a word. She closed her eyes and slowly said. ‘I need to go for a walk.’

She got dressed and quickly left her quarters. Letting her mind be unfocused, she didn’t plan to go in any specific direction. She pressed a random floor on the display panel in the elevator. Soon as the blast door opened, just like before Havre made herself invisible. She walked closer to the wall of the corridor, careful not to bump into any troops keeping guard on the ship. She headed in random directions, turning into one passage after another, slowly losing track of where she was. But not only didn't it help to calm her down, but it also seemed to deepen the feeling on her shoulders. With every step, the sensation got stronger, until Havre finally stopped in a dark dead-end of the corridor, not able to ignore it any longer. She looked around, panting, only to realize she was standing on the prison deck. She heard sudden footsteps and looked around to see two guards coming her way. She impulsively lifted her hand and after merely a second, the troops looked at each other with confusion. 

‘Weren’t we supposed to be on the second floor?’ One asked, looking around in a stupor.

‘I think so…’ The other answered slowly and they both turned around to head in the other direction. 

Havre followed them with her gaze until they disappeared behind a corner and then turned to the blast door before her. “What am I doing…?” a question skimmed her mind, but something inside reassured her that somehow she stood where she was supposed to be. Still hesitantly, she lifted up her hand and slowly opened the gate with the Force. 

She entered a small, dark chamber. On the floor, under the only dim light that illuminated the room, she saw the same, deep blue eyes looking up at her from under a grey, ragged hood. She stood in place, petrified in silence, not knowing why she ended up where she did, but still feeling that she was in the right place. 

‘What did you do to me?’ she asked slowly. The Jedi didn’t answer right away. ‘What did you do to me on Jedha?’ she insisted.

‘I didn’t do anything to you.’ he answered calmly. 

Havre tried to calm her breath. She looked around anxiously, avoiding the Jedi’s piercing gaze. 

‘May I ask  _ you _ a question?’ he asked curiously. Havre forced herself to look at him, but didn’t answer. ‘Why are you here?’ 

‘What…?’ she stuttered.

‘What brought you here, Havre?’

‘Nothing brought me here- you…’ Havre frowned, confused. ‘How do you know my name?’

‘I know a lot of things about you, young one.’ he said calmly. 

‘What things…?’ She whispered, but suddenly the Jedi looked at the door behind her and she heard loud footsteps heading their way. 

‘General Hux wants to bring the inmate on the ground floor.’ she heard the guard’s voice from the distance. 

‘I thought they were going to hold him in here for longer?’ 

‘Orders changed.’ 

Havre knew she had less than ten seconds to react. She looked at the door and then back at the Jedi. 

‘I think you better go.’ he said, but Havre impulsively jumped up to him and reached his chains to open the force wielding cuffs. The troops were coming in closer and sweat appeared on her forehead as she was struggling to break the lock. 

‘The Starfighters are on the dock, on-ground A0’ she whispered quickly. At last, she managed to break the lock, seconds before the blast door opened and two guards walked in. Havre’s heart skipped a beat. 

‘Where is he?’ a trooper’s low voice echoed in the chamber. 

‘What?’

‘WHERE IS THE INMATE YOU DUMBASS?!’

‘Oh, shit…’

‘Notify General Hu-’ but he didn’t finish, as Havre pushed both of the troops down to the floor with the Force. 

‘Let’s clear those heads…’ she muttered and waved her hand over their helmets. The troops groaned in confusion and shock, but Havre was already out of the door. She locked it behind her and hastily headed straight ahead out of the prison deck. She had no way of knowing if the Jedi would make it to the hangar, but she couldn’t risk doing anything more. She entered the first elevator she wandered upon and headed down to the level closest to her quarters. When she walked out, she gasped and suddenly froze in motion. Ren was standing by the door right in front of her. She inhaled sharply. Their eyes met for a split second but then his gaze wandered around her as if she wasn’t there. She exhaled slowly. “He can’t see me…” she reassured herself and quietly passed him to walk across the hall to the next elevator that led to her quarters. 

When the door closed behind her, she finally was able to calm down a bit. She slowed her breath and squinted her eyes. 

‘What the hell did I just do…?’ she muttered. She stumbled to her bed, shaking, trying to control a rush of adrenaline that flooded her head. She forced herself to close her eyes and slowly steady her breath. She reached out to the Force and entered the white void inside her head, stepping out of her body.

The last 24 hours were pure chaos. Havre felt like it happened so quickly and out of her control, yet still, she was the center of it. She needed explanations, she needed answers. And something in her head made her believe that she could get them from the Jedi. His appearance, however rapid and out of the blue, for the first time in her life, allowed her to have hope. A hope to finally have access to the lost puzzle piece of herself. A part of her she never thought she could get to know… If he wasn’t lying, if he truly knew who she was… Havre had to find out at any cost. Nothing else mattered. 


	10. Gravity's pull

#  Gravity’s pull 

‘HOW DID HE ESCAPE?!’ Snoke’s outraged voice echoed loudly in the throne chamber. Hux flinched. Havre saw his hands shaking, as he was struggling to get a hold of himself. 

‘As I said, sir…’ the general whispered fearfully. ‘Somebody must have helped him get out… I- Ah!’ Hux squeaked, as Snoke picked him up with the Force and hit his body on the floor, as if it weighed nothing. Havre could hear Hux let out a quiet, painful howl. She looked away and suddenly met Ren’s gaze. They looked at each other for a moment, before Havre turned her head away. She felt her stomach turn.  _ Did he know…? _

‘FIND THE TRAITOR!’ Snoke roared. ‘If you fail to do so, I’m afraid, you will have to pay for this mistake yourself, General.’ 

Hux picked himself up from the floor and mumbling something under his breath, stumbled out of the room. Havre watched this pitiful scene with a lump in her throat. She found something reminiscent of remorse inside of her, but knew there was little to nothing she could do if she wanted to stay out of sight. 

‘You two…’ Snoke hissed at her and Ren, narrowing his eyes. ‘Find the Jedi… Bring him back, alive.’

‘Yes, Supreme Leader.’ Ren replied strongly. ‘I believe he took one of the Starfighters, he couldn’t have gone far. We can still track him down…’

‘Get back on that ship’ Snoke drawled. ‘and find him. My patience is running out.’

Havre followed Ren out of the room and as soon as the blast door closed behind her, she felt a shiver pass through her. Snoke’s anger was so overwhelming, focusing on closing off her mind was harder than ever, and under pressure… almost impossible. Havre slowed her steps, trying to buy herself more time to think. She had to come up with a plan. The day before she acted recklessly, too choked up on the adrenaline to think about the consequences her actions would bring. Although she knew Snoke would find out sooner or later, she scolded herself for not making up any plan on how she was going to contact the Jedi afterwards. 

‘We’ll take my command shuttle’ Ren’s serious tone broke through the barrier of her thoughts. ‘It’s bigger, and we might need a trooper squad…’

‘No.’ Havre cut him off and felt that his gaze lingered on her face a few seconds longer than it normally has.  _ Was it suspicion?  _ Havre looked into his eyes, trying to come off as if she had nothing to hide. ‘I think… It would be better if we split up.’

‘Split up?’ Ren frowned, confused and malcontent. ‘No. And I don’t think you’re in a position to make any decisions. Or question mine.’

‘What?’ She blurted out, crossing her arms. 

‘Outside of that throne room,’ Ren pointed to the elevator door. ‘You listen to me. I don’t have time to bicker about command matters with someone like you.’

Havre opened her mouth with disbelief, but before she could address Ren, the elevator stopped and he walked out, deliberately ignoring her. They stepped again out into the hangar. 

‘Might I remind you,’ Havre hissed, quickening up to his pace. ‘that I am not your subordinate. And as far as I remember it, I was the one to capture the Jedi…’ 

Ren ignored her and turned to an officer in a black suit that approached them out of nowhere. 

‘Sir,’ the officer spoke up sternly. ‘the inmate escaped in one of the starfighters from the A0 level. He tried to disable the tracking device, but we managed to locate the ship.’

‘Send the division to my command shuttle and prepare for take-off in five.’ Ren commanded coldly. 

‘Yes, sir.’ the officer walked away exclaiming directions to the radio in his hand. Ren led Havre to the command shuttle - a large Upsilon-class ship, with side wings so tall, they nearly touched the Hangar’s ceiling. On its side, a formation of troops in black uniforms was already preparing for take-off. Havre and Ren walked into the ship through the lowered entry ramp and he went straight to the large cockpit. Located on the front of the ship, behind a red-glass window, the pilot compartment was equipped with a set of two seats. Ren, as usual, took the flight officer pilot’s position, the co-pilot’s chair was already occupied by a trooper. 

‘I want to co-pilot.’ Havre stated. The trooper looked over at her, and then at Ren. 

‘Sit down,’ Ren ordered, turning on different switches on the command panel. ‘I already told you, you have no say in this.’

‘Move.’ Havre shoved the trooper’s seat and the pilot anxiously looked down at her lightsabers. Ren turned his head and Havre held his angry gaze. 

‘Go back to your seat.’ Ren drawled the words one by one, staring her down. 

‘I’m not going anywhere.’ She responded, frowning her brows and sinking her fingers in the back of the pilot’s chair. ‘I’m not your subordinate, Ren. You have no right to give me any orders. However proud you may have been of your position as Snoke's  _ precious, chosen _ apprentice, I think it’s time for you to level with the fact that I’m not going to step down. Snoke chose  _ me _ . And I have no intention of being second to you in any way. Not now, not ever.’

Ren narrowed his eyes with anger. The trooper pilot mumbled something about “getting out of their way” and wriggled out of the chair, under Havre’s arm. As he left the cockpit, Havre took her rightful place in the co-pilot seat. 

‘I just hope you know what you’re doing.’ Ren muttered, as Havre fastened her seatbelts. Truth be told, Havre had co-piloted only a few times in her life, but her mission was now not to do a good job, but to let the Jedi escape from the system. She looked at the navigation screen and noticed a pulsating green dot on the radar, far from the base - the Jedi’s ship. 

Havre inhaled, as the shuttle took off and flew out of the hangar, and focused her thoughts. She had to work it out slowly. Ren would keep his eye closely on her as long as he’s not focused on flying the shuttle. For now, she took it on herself to lead the ship after the Jedi’s starfighter and not to raise any suspicion. 

‘He’s passing Celwis’s, approaching Ephemora,’ Havre announced, handling the navigation panel. ‘At this rate of speed, we should be able to cut him off before he reaches the next system.’

Ren gave her an unpleasant look, but didn’t say a word. The shuttle was less maneuverable than the Silencer they had previously been on. It was a big, heavy ship, built for transportation rather than a galactic chase, but in Ren’s hand that didn’t seem to be an issue. He handled it smoothly, with ease, once again proving to be an excellent pilot. 

‘Any support forces?’ he asked shortly.

‘None.’ Havre responded, imposing a shield sensor on the navigation screen. ‘But there is a transportation line formed near Csila’s border.’

‘We’ll fly north, meet him half-way down. Estimated time?’

‘Up to six minutes.’

‘Too slow.’ Ren clicked his tongue. ‘We have to catch him before he approaches the border.’

‘I don’t think he’s heading for the border...’ Havre said, truthfully, staring at the navigation panel. The Jedi was moving along the Csila system, heading south. ‘I think... he’s going to land.’ 

‘Where?’ Ren asked, surprised, and looked over her shoulder at the map. 

‘Yashu, or… Leos. He’s in between the two.’

‘Then we’ll go through there.’

‘That’s in five.’

‘Good. Let’s make it four.’ Ren switched the drive up to the maximum speed and the engine’s low, vibrating tone reached the cockpit. 

The ship hastened between the planets, entering a broader, empty space. Outside the red window, two gigantic planets loomed on the horizon. As they moved in closer, Havre began to feel her stomach tightening. She still had no idea how she was going to help the Jedi escape and now was the time to start. She looked down at the map. The Jedi seemed to have no care in the world, flying with no support in the open space. “What the hell is he doing?” she thought and glanced at Ren. His gaze was fixed outside the window on the place, where in about two minutes the starfighter should have appeared. She closed her eyes for a short moment and focused, estimating the danger and result of every scenario she could think of. If the Jedi doesn’t know he’s being chased, then she has to let him know. She looked over at the command panel situated before Ren. There was no way of lowering the shield without him noticing. She turned her head to the side and saw the back of two troopers sitting in the weapon compartment. A quick thought skimmed her head. She reached out to the Force and in a quick snap entered one of the troopers' mind. Casting aside his thought that flushed her head instantly, she directed his hands over at the console. 

“Shoot.” She commanded and the trooper pulled the trigger slowly, as if in a dream.

‘WHAT THE HELL?!’ Ren’s roar pulled her back to her seat. ‘WHO SHOT THAT BLASTER?!’

Havre saw a laser beam blasted from the shuttle approach and miss the starfighter far ahead. She looked over at the navigation panel and saw that the Jedi had sped up. Ren’s face was fuming with anger. He switched the lock on the command panel, lowering the shields. 

‘FOR FUCK’S SAKE, ALL POWER TO THE ENGINE! HE WON’T GET AWAY!’ he shouted and Havre had to do as he said. Ren was almost standing up in his seat, hovering on the pilot’s console, initiating full speed.

Havre felt the sweat on the back of her neck. In a minute they were closing in on the starfighter, which rapidly turned east and headed speeding towards the Planet Lioaoin. With eyes wide open, she watched as the command shuttle revolved, shadowing the Jedi’s ship, as it was barely managing to keep the safe distance.

‘He’s not entering the atmosphere…’ Havre said under her breath, forgetting she was supposed to inform Ren. But he was already too focused on chasing the ship, to see which way they were heading. The small Starfighter veered in different directions, as if trying to not be in their shot range, as the heavy shuttle pushed forward at a constant speed. 

‘Prepare the interdiction field!’ Ren commanded, but before Havre could do anything, she suddenly noticed an eerie view emerge from the distance. Near the planet, a flash of red-orange lights moved in a familiar way, pulling in… And the shuttle was approaching it with a maximum speed, as the Jedi led them straight into it… 

‘REN!’ Havre tore off her seatbelts and jumped up to her feet, but his eyes were focused on the fastly moving ship outside the window. ‘THE GRAVITY WELL!’

As her shout reached Ren’s ears, the Starfighter rapidly turned upright and flew up, streaking the wall of their shuttle in a near collision. When the ship moved out of the way, unveiling the huge vortex of red and yellow light, a sudden alarm pounded through the cockpit. Ren stared at the gravity well wide-eyed, paralyzed, realizing what had happened. It was too late. The gravity hole had already started to pull them inside. 

Without thinking, Havre threw herself at the command panel and pushed the pilot’s console all the way down. At the last second, the shuttle’s front leaped down, and already at full speed approached the planet below. With the rapid turn, Havre was painfully shoved onto the command panel and her face was up close to the red glass window, so she found herself gaping at the Planet’s surface closing in at a breakneck speed.

But the gravitational pull of the well had already started to suck the shuttle’s wings inside. An ominous sound, like a groan or tearing, filled the ship, as the two opposite force fields stressed the metal panels. The next seconds became a blur. Havre heard screams of terror, then a loud roaring sound of crushing metal and felt someone’s strong arm pulling her down, as her body was almost thrown into the air. Something hard and bland hit her head and then it all went black. 


	11. Nightfall

#  Nightfall

‘Havre...’ a voice echoed in her head, muffled by a high-pitched, static noise in her ears. She tried to open her eyes, but everything around her was blurry and moving in slow motion. ‘Havre…!’

A hazy image of a face appeared leaning over her and she felt someone’s arms picking her up from the ground. She groaned, as her senses slowly started to come back and she became aware of blinding pain in her chest and the back of her head. She lay motionless in the arms and felt her eyelids slowly getting heavier. 

‘Stay with me.’ she heard the muffled voice again. ‘Come on, Havre, stay with me.’ 

She tried to open her eyes again, but her body refused to obey. She couldn’t hold on any longer. Her limbs became numb and Havre felt as if she was gradually falling into a dark void. She had to let go...

And then suddenly, she saw a small gleam of light, somewhere far above her head. She focused her eyes on it, watching it expand, illuminating the darkness around her. And then, Havre heard a distant voice calling her name. 

‘Havre…’ She felt air coming into her lungs and as she exhaled, everything around her slowly started to take form. After mere seconds, she could vaguely recognize the shapes of a hazy landscape surrounding her, and a face hovering above her. ‘Hey! Can you hear me?’

‘Ren…?’ She mumbled out, as she slowly got used to the light and the face became clearer. He held her by the hand and helped her sit up, backing her up against a hard surface. 

Havre looked around. They were surrounded by dense bushes, from which huge, deciduous trees grew, covered almost entirely by spongy green moss. Between the spread-out crowns of the trees, here and there broke through a narrow ray of the setting sun, partially illuminating the dark bushes growing on the ground under their feet. 

‘Where are we…?’ she asked with confusion and touched the back of her head, where she suddenly felt a dim pain.

‘We crashed.’ Ren replied shortly. Havre just then noticed that his face was covered in ash and strains of blood, so were his ripped clothes. And suddenly it all came back to her. The Jedi, the chase, the Gravity Well, and finally... the planet. 

‘So… the ship…?’

‘Ripped to shreds.’

‘And the troops?’

‘Dead.’

Havre exhaled through clenched teeth. Ren closed his eyes and rested his head against the palm of his hand. They sat in silence and rested for a long moment. 

Around them, among the trees and shrubs, numerous sounds of insects and birds reached Havre’s ears, merging into a strange organic harmony. The humid and warm air around them was brushed from time to time by a colder breeze coming from above.

‘We should, um…’ Ren broke the silence and frowned, visibly trying to get his thoughts together. ‘We should find the nearest village, or something... get a ship…’

‘Yeah...’ Havre slowly stood up, holding onto a rock, that she was sitting next to. She felt a stinging pain in her ribs and shoulders, as well as a severe headache, but otherwise, she was quite fine. At least none of her bones were broken. The armor was scratched and dent in some places, the fabric partially ripped. Definitely in a better condition than Ren’s was. He was still sitting hunched down, eyes-closed and Havre felt a sudden grip of a strange emotion in her chest. They must have been in a good distance from the crash and he carried her all the way down here, while probably being injured himself. She opened her mouth to say something, but then quickly refrained herself. For some reason, she couldn't possibly imagine formulating any words of gratitude to Ren. It just seemed to be something she would regret later.

‘The night will fall soon, we should find shelter.’ she said finally, with no emotion. Ren nodded and inhaled slowly, as he tried to pick himself up, but just when he was about to stand, he groaned in pain and if Havre wouldn’t have caught him, he’d fall on the ground.

‘I’ll go.’ She said, helping him sit down. ‘You should take care of your leg.’ 

‘No, I’ll come with you.’ he grunted, clearly bothered by her seeing him so weak. Their eyes met for a brief moment.

‘You would just slow me down.’ Havre said lastly, turning her head away. She picked up her lightsabers from the ground and fastened them on the straps around her thighs. ‘I’ll be back before sundown.’

‘Fine.’ he sighed and leaned his back against the rock. Havre glanced at him one last time before heading deeper into the woods.

From the small plain, where they had been sitting, there were no roads or pathways, so Havre had to walk straight through the wild thickets. The bushes grew out long, lithe branches, that intertwined forming thick walls of leaves, she had to cut through with her saber to wade further. From time to time, she would feel something brush against her legs, as strange creatures quickly jumped out her way. 

When surrounded by static sounds of nature, she finally had a chance to reflect on what happened. The Jedi escaped, although it seemed that it was due to his own skill, if not to a strike of pure luck. But however relieved she was, that the Jedi didn’t get into Snoke’s hands again, she couldn’t help but feel uncertain if that all will prove to be in any way useful. Yes, the Jedi lived, but how will she be able to contact him? For all she knew, he could’ve been on the other side of the Galaxy by now. And since Snoke didn’t manage to find him for over ten years, how much better would she be? 

‘If we’ll even get out of this damn place…’ she said under her breath, waving her hand to drive away small insects flying around her face. The humid weather was beginning to put its toll on Havre. Sweat ran down from under her hair and her feet were covered in mud. She stopped to catch her breath and scanned the area to see any place even remotely fit for a shelter. But the forest was stretching far and wide all around her, obscuring the horizon. 

Finally, Havre decided to climb a tree to get a better look. She fastened her saber and jumped up, reaching the first branch. She had to move carefully, as the moss covering the bark was mushing underneath her fingers. She climbed the tree just about four or five meters, as from that point further, the leaves completely obscured the view. Holding onto a firm branch, she took a look around. Even from that point of view, Havre couldn’t see anything beyond the densely growing trees and bushes. There was no trace of civilization in sight, no villages, no huts - nothing. But a few meters down south, she noticed a small water stream, and next to it, an enormous strange growing tree, which had huge roots sticking out of the surface. Under them, the ground had been partially dug out, probably by an animal, forming a makeshift cave. 

‘Will do.’ Havre said under her breath and jumped down from the tree. When her feet touched the ground, a distant low rumble reached her ears. It sounded as if someone was dragging something very heavy through the rushes. She turned around, but everything around her was completely still. Few seconds passed, and the strange noise gradually went away, and finally, she couldn’t hear it anymore. Whatever it was, it was heading in a different direction. 

Havre didn’t think much of it and rushed through the forest towards the plain where she had left Ren. It was quite easy to find her way back, as she had left many lightsaber marks on the bushes. When she finally reached the plain, Havre found Ren asleep, sitting with his back against a tree. Havre walked up to him, with the sole intention of waking him up, but for some reason, she hesitated. Her eyes lingered on Ren's face for a while. He looked so calm, it seemed almost unbelievable to Havre that he didn’t frown in his sleep. His face, even with blood and dust smudged all over, looked elegant and peaceful. Havre at once felt a little embarrassed for staring at him for so long. She touched his arm gently and at once, he woke up, reaching instinctively to his saber. 

‘It’s me.’ Havre calmed him down. 

‘Oh.’ he muttered and put his saber down, shaking off sleep.

‘I found a spot where we can spend the night. Can you walk?’

She helped him stand up, but as soon as he rested on both legs, he flinched with pain and fell onto Havre, nearly knocking her down. She quickly upheld him with her both arms and Ren tried to stand up straight again. 

‘Stop doing that, you’re just gonna make it worse!’ Havre scolded him and put his arm around her neck. 

‘What the hell are you doing…?’

‘What do you think I’m doing?’ she scoffed and supported his back with her other hand. ‘Let’s go, the sun is setting already.’ 

Ren looked at her, frowning, and hesitated for a moment, but then finally sighed and let her support him as they slowly made their way into the woods. 

They walked for a long time, as they had to take small steps. Ren was heavier than Havre had expected and he had to rest on her with almost all his weight, dragging his limp leg behind. And the tangled bushes underneath their feet did not help. 

When they finally reached the makeshift shelter, the sun had set. Havre was out of her breath and sweating. But the stinging pain in her ribs somehow disappeared. She found it strange, but didn’t dwell on it, as she focused on preparing the shelter for both of them. She laid Ren on the ground inside the cave and started walking around it, gathering leaves and branches that would cover up the holes between the roots that made the cave. After twenty minutes of her hard work, the shelter was secured, and additionally, the leafy branches worked as camouflage, masking the cave from possible intruders. Happy with herself, Havre walked into the small makeshift hut.

Ren was awake. He had torn off a piece of his robe, where his leg was broken, and Havre saw it was red and swollen. 

‘Looks pretty bad.’ she muttered.

‘You think?’ he scoffed angrily. Havre saw his face was flushed and sweating from the pain. She bit her lip and moved closer to him. ‘Don’t touch it!’ he yelled, when she reached her hand towards the breakage. 

‘Relax,’ she gaped at him, irritated. ‘I think I can help you.’

‘How?!’

‘Seriously, if you don’t relax it will just get worse.’

Ren let out air through his clenched teeth. 

‘Oh, I don’t think it can get worse than this.’ he drawled, trying to restrain himself from groaning in pain.

‘Let me help you.’ she said calmly. 

‘Fine, just…’ Ren blurted out. ‘Just do it quickly.’

Havre nodded and reached out her hand towards his leg and closed her eyes to focus. She inhaled slowly and reached out to the Force around her. As she exhaled, the sounds of the world around her were muffled, like she was separated from in with invisible walls. She felt a tingling sensation in her fingers, as the energy let out from her and she directed it to Ren’s leg. And after just a second, Ren screamed in so much pain, she flinched and stopped, shaking off her focus. 

‘What…? What happened?’ she asked, shocked, running her eyes over Ren’s painfully grimace face. He couldn’t answer, howling in pain and digging his nails in the muddy ground. She desperately leaned over his leg and squeezed her eyes, trying to focus over his cries. She felt the Force leaving her hands again and somehow sensed his breakage coming into place, but the longer she healed it, the harder Ren’s voice grew scratched with his scream. 

And then something strange began happening to Havre. Suddenly a strange sensation hit her body, as if electricity was flooding her veins and under her eyelids, appeared flashing images of people and places Havre had never seen. She was at once paralyzed, still feeling the warm energy of the Force leaving her fingers, but her mind was out of her body, somewhere in a very dark place. She saw a flashing image of a strange woman and a man, looking at her with dissatisfaction, but before she could react in any way, they dissolved into dark smoke, and in their place appeared a dim, empty room. Havre felt an overwhelming feeling of sadness and anger inside. Uncontrollable tears ran down her face, as the image faded away into smoke and changed into another face of an old man, illuminated with green light, looking at her with a grotesque grimace of madness and rage. Havre drowned in an overwhelming feeling of desperation growing inside of her and the man’s picture changed into a dark cave, then quickly into Snoke’s face, then a pile of dead bodies covered in ash. Havre was gripped with an unbearable feeling of guilt and anger, tearing her apart, so strongly it almost felt physical. She couldn’t take it any longer. She let out a muffled cry and snapped off of Ren’s leg, falling down on her back.

The visions were gone and she found herself back inside the shelter. She slowly sat up, holding onto her head, feeling dizzy. 

Ren was lying motionless on the floor, unconscious from the pain. Havre slowly moved closer to him and shook his arm firmly. 

‘Ren…!’ She whispered loudly and leaned in closer, now shaking both his arms. He mumbled some inarticulate word under his breath and slowly opened his eyes. Havre let out a sigh of relief, but couldn’t think of anything to say. 

They looked at each other for a long, quiet moment. A strange, gripping feeling appeared inside her chest. Somehow she became aware that the visions she saw were Ren’s memories.

And suddenly, they both were brought back to reality and looked away. Havre helped him sit up, before moving away to give him some space in the small cave. Ren cleared his throat, with a sense of embarrassment. 

‘You passed out… How’s your leg…?’ she asked, turning her head away, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. Ren slowly bent and straightened his leg, letting out a surprised “oh” of relief. 

‘It’s… healed! How did you do that…?’

Havre scratched her head. 

‘Um… I’m not really sure…’ 

He looked at her with his mouth open with a surprised expression. 

‘I-ah…’ He muttered and hesitated for a moment. ‘Thank you… It’s the second time you've done this…’

‘What are you talking about?’ Havre looked back at him with confusion. 

‘Seriously, I remember you did the same thing on Jedha.’ He sent her a glare of mixed emotions. ‘I don’t understand… Why didn’t you just… Leave me there to die? It’s not like you don’t have enough motifs for that.’

Havre frowned and didn’t answer right away.

She thought back to Jedha when wondered the same thing. Not long after that incident, she realized that somehow, apart from her hatred towards Ren, she knew that if she wanted to be free once again, she needed his help. Wherever she would have a chance to hide, no matter how far in the Galaxy she would run, Snoke would have found her sooner or later. She wouldn’t bear to live in his shadow, terrified that any day his guards would appear on her front door. 

And now, seeing how conflicted Ren truly was, she realized that there might be a chance to form an alliance with him. 

‘I think you misjudge me, Ren.’ She said shortly. ‘If I’d wanted you dead, I would kill you in a fair fight. Besides, I’m paying you back for getting me out of that crash.’

‘So you mean now that we’re even I should watch my back?’ He asked and scowled at her, slightly smirking.

‘That’s right.’ Havre replied laughingly, putting on an indistinct smile.


	12. The Village

# The Village

* * *

Havre was woken up by the sounds of early birds at dawn. She lay quietly with her eyes closed for a long moment, trying to fall back to sleep, but couldn’t. Finally, she sat up with a sigh and looked around the shelter. Ren wasn’t there, but scraps of his armor laid in the place he had been sleeping. Havre rubbed her eyes, still foggy from sleep and her ears caught a distant sound of water. She crawled out of the makeshift shed and stood up, stretching her sore arms in the air. 

The forest, illuminated by morning sunshine, looked incredible. Sun rays peeking through emerald green leaves that swayed gently with the breeze, flickered on the ground, creating a beautiful mosaic. Since Havre had been taken from Korriban to join the Descendants, she was forced to live in a place where no nature could grow. And just now she remembered how much she missed it. The soft hum of wind brushing through the trees, the smell of grass and resin, the sounds of birds wrangling between branches. Havre always found herself drawn to nature when she was a child. Now, recalling her days at Korriban, she thought that the long stretching forest surrounding the temples was really the only comfort she knew back then. Now, though she had grown past the need of such comfort, it brought back vague memories of happiness. They might have been the only ones she had ever experienced. 

A splashing sound of water reached her ears and she saw something move behind the trees where the stream flowed. She walked over there, carefully, and let out a sigh of relief, seeing that it was Ren. He was leaning over the water, shirtless, washing the wounds on his hands and shoulders. Havre looked at his arched back and saw it was torn through with several similar long scars. Some were clearly old, but others looked recent, still healing. Something about them made Havre feel uneasy and she thought about what or who could’ve possibly injured him so much. 

Ren straightened up and turned around to pick up his clothes, suddenly locking eyes with Havre. At once she felt embarrassed that he noticed her looking at him in this situation.

‘Um, sorry.’ she mumbled and turned her head away.

‘It’s fine.’ he said, unbothered and brushed wet hair away from his face. ‘I was about to go back, so you can do whatever you need here, and then we can go start looking for any villages around here.’ 

‘Alright.’ Havre was still looking away, trying not to seem bothered by his naked torso. It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen anyone else’s body before, but it had never been in such a casual situation.

Ren picked up his clothes and walked past her towards the camp. When Havre was sure he couldn’t see her, she undressed from her armor, and leaving only her undergarments on, walked into the stream.

The water was ice cold and clear. Havre immediately felt more at peace when it washed the dust and dried blood from her body and the coldness awakened her senses. When she was done, she put her clothes back on, carrying the metal protectors loose in her hand. 

Ren was sitting outside the hut, leaned over something that as Havre got closer turned out to be a dead furry animal. She just then realized how hungry she was.

‘Cut it from the stomach, sideways and pull off the skin,’ she said towards Ren, who sat helpless with a metal scrap as a knife in his hand. ‘otherwise you’ll just ruin the flesh.’

He sent her a quick look and turned the animal over. 

‘And don’t cut it too deep, the insides will come out.’ She added and put the metal protectors on the side of the hut. ‘I’ll start a fire.’ 

‘Alright…’ he said and slowly started to cut the animal. Havre looked over his shoulder and wanted to say something about the way he was holding the knife, but decided to stay quiet and not get on his nerves.

They ate their meal hastily, both incredibly hungry. The roasted meat was tough and tasteless, but it was enough to satisfy them. The sun started to rise to the zenith, as they left the shelter, heading again into the tangled woods. Ren walked first, cutting their way through thick bushes and vines with his lightsaber. Funnily, when not surrounded by the darkness of the Supremacy ship, without his mask and a long cloak, Ren looked somewhat closer to a regular human than to a Sith. Havre couldn’t shake off the feeling that there was something utterly different about the way he was, then how Kadmûr or the Descendants were. Something she couldn’t really grasp, though it seemed to be simple in nature. 

Ren suddenly stopped and Havre rapidly broke away from her thoughts. 

‘What is it?’ she asked, noticing his eyes were fixed in a point far into the woods. 

‘Can you hear that?’ he asked under his breath and Havre followed his gaze, listening attentively. Indeed, somewhere far out in the woods before them, came a muffled, distant sound, as if someone was hitting metal with a blunt tool.

‘That can’t be an animal.’ Ren said and they both headed fastly, following the sound. 

As they approached the source of the strange noise, the woods began to thin out and finally, they got closer to a large yellowish plain, from where the metallic sound echoed loudly. Havre looked over Ren’s arm and saw someone standing in the middle of the plain. It was a short, wrinkly creature, dressed in ragged, sandy clothes and in its hands, Havre noticed a large, triangular bell that seemed to be the source of the strange sounds.

‘Hey!’ Ren walked onto the plain without hesitation, but Havre stayed back, directed by a strange gut feeling. ‘Can you tell me where the nearest village is?!’ Ren yelled, trying to be heard over the loud ringing of the bell. When he got closer, the creature rapidly jumped up noticing Ren’s presence, and let out a high-pitched screech in an unknown language. Havre looked up and saw rope bridges stretched out between the trees, hovering with the weight of dozens of similar-looking creatures to the one standing on the plain. They seemed to be excited, pointing to Havre and Ren with their short fingers. 

‘Um… Ren…!’ Havre shouted towards him. ‘I have a bad feeling about this…’ But her last words were drowned in a loud thump that suddenly came from the bushes. The same sound that she heard the first day when she was looking for shelter... Havre looked over to the side and saw trees in the distance being bent to the side, as something large was barging through them, on their way to the plain. The creatures swaying on the bridges, started chanting with excitement and throwing their hands in the air. Ren, who still had been trying to communicate with the one standing on the ground, turned to the side and suddenly froze in stupefaction, when a loud roar came from the trees. Havre reached for her lightsabers, seconds before the bushes parted, and from them jumped out a horrifying monster. 

With eight legs, wide as the trees surrounding it, four narrow eyes and horns running from its nose to the back of a long tail, covered in greyish-green scales - it looked like a ginormous toad, but more horrifying and definitely... louder. When it opened its jaws, from inside emerged three long tongues, trembling with the earing roar that the monster let out. Havre and Ren ignited their sabers at the same time.

The monster launched at Ren and the creature holding the bell, but they both managed to jump out of its way at the last second. Havre ran into the plain, engaging loud cheers from the crowd beneath the treetops. The giant toad was facing Ren and Havre quickly jumped behind it, ramming her saber into its back. When the laser cut through its thick skin, the beast roared in anger and waved its tail, painfully pushing Havre away. As it slowly turned away from Ren, he quickly swung his crossed saber, jamming it into the monster’s neck, but didn’t cut very deep, as the giant leaped towards Havre, pushing him away with its side. Havre quickly jumped up from the ground, and managed to dodge the attack at the last moment, leaping to the side. 

Now the monster, her, and Ren were situated in a triangle on the plain. Havre looked at him significantly and their thoughts collided for a split second. Ren nodded and as soon as the toad roared and leaped towards Havre, she reached out her hand and closed her eyes. Time slowed down and she felt the monster trapped inside the Force surrounding her. When she opened her eyes, she saw the creature stopped in half a move, as if frozen in time, with its mouth gaping open. She inhaled and flexed her muscles, struggling to hold the heavy creature in place. 

Ren pushed his feet up from the ground, jumping onto the Toads back. He ran up the scales and as time around the creature slowly started to move faster, he reached the creature's head, and with every strength, he had, pushed his lightsaber into its skull. 

The time sped up and the creature let out a howling roar, stumbled on its legs, and with a loud thump collapsed onto the plain centimeters before Havre's feet. 

Ren jumped to the ground and as they both stood there, panting, their eyes met for a long moment, when everything around them was quiet. 

And suddenly, loud cheers bustled out from the treetops, and when they looked up, the native creatures, one by one jumped down to the plain, waving their hands in rejoicing. In a moment, they surrounded their legs and began chanting some unknown words.

Havre and Ren looked at each other with confusion. 

‘Do you understand what they’re saying?’ Ren asked, trying to ward off some of the creatures that tried to hold on to his knees. 

‘N-no.’ Havre answered, trying to hold off laughter at the sight of Snoke’s chosen apprentice waving his legs around little wrinkled people. ‘But I think they are trying to thank us…’

Havre took a closer look at the creatures. They looked similar to Biths, but their heads were small, hairless, and wrinkly, with two large yellow eyes. Some of them were pale, some were more of color similar to clay. All of them spoke in high pitch voices, now excited like nobody Havre has ever seen. A few of them ran towards the woods and after a short moment, carried out a litter chair made out of green branches on their back. On it, sat a small hooded figure. When the natives carrying the sedan approached Ren and Havre, the crowd stepped aside in a respectful manner and fell silent. The figure sitting on the litter slowly removed its hood and revealed a face of an old Cerean woman. Her foggy, grey eyes lingered on Havre and Ren for a while, before she waved her hand, gesturing to her servants to put her down. She stood up, holding onto a wooden cane.

‘You have killed our enemy.’ she said with a heavy accent. ‘We are grateful.’

Havre and Ren exchanged quick looks. 

‘I am guessing you come from the crashed machine.’ she said, putting both of her wrinkled hands on a cane. 

‘Yes.’ Havre answered. 

‘The tribe of our people doesn’t welcome guests. But we must welcome saviors.’

‘We need a ship.’ Ren cut in, stepping closer to the woman. ‘Do you have one?’

‘A machine?’ the Cerean squinted her eyes at his lack of manners. ‘No.’

Ren sighed and turned his head to the side.

‘This is a waste of time.’ He muttered, but Havre ignored him. She leaned closer to the woman.

‘Is there any place on this planet where we can get one?’ Havre asked, in a most polite voice she could let out. The woman nodded slowly. ‘Can you take us there?’

‘No.’ Havre raised her eyebrows, as the woman frowned hers. ‘We don’t know where that is.’

‘Great.’ Ren sighed and crossed his arms. Havre nudged his side. 

‘Please, we have to get back to our system. Is there any way you could direct us out of these woods? Is there any city?’ 

The woman squinted her eyes and looked closely at Havre, then let out a short grunt and swayed her cane front to back.

‘We do have maps. In the village. We can show you.’

‘Thank you.’ Havre nodded and straightened back, leaning closer to Ren. ‘See, a little patience pays off.’ She said under her breath and Ren just rolled his eyes. 

‘Come, come.’ The woman sighed and sat back on the litter, which was again picked up by her people and slowly carried to the woods. The rest of the tribe surrounded Ren and Havre and followed the litter through the woods, whispering something to each other along the way. 

The tribe led them through hidden passways between the trees to a large rock, on which hung a thick wall of red ivy. The two natives that led the procession, grabbed the hanging vines and parted it like a curtain, under which the rest of them easily passed through. When they exited the secret entrance, before Havre’s eyes appeared a small valley hidden in between two tall boulders that guarded the inside, fenced from the rest of the forest.

The whole valley was covered in small, wooden huts with little fenced-off gardens and small plots of wheat. From one to another, led a narrow pavement made out of red clay. In the middle, rising above other huts on three logs, stood a bigger, two-story shack. That's where the tribe led Havre, Ren, and the Cerean woman. When they stopped before the small steps leading to the house, the leader spoke to her people in a foreign language and the crowd, however reluctantly, scattered around their homes. 

‘Follow me.’ the woman said and supporting herself with the cane, walked into the shack. Ren and Havre had to almost bend in half to fit in the small home. 

The circular room inside of the shack was illuminated with warm light coming from a large, spheric lamp built into the ground in the middle. The Cerean rested on small throne-like material cushions and pointed to the floor for her guest to sit on. 

‘We really just want to see the map.’ Ren said impatiently, but sat down, as he couldn’t otherwise fit inside the hut. 

‘Trust me, young one, I also wish for you to leave as soon as possible.’ the woman said, squinting her grey eyes. She noticed the confused look on Havre’s face and pointed her wrinkled finger to the lightsabers on her thighs. ‘I lived many years outside this planet. I have seen red blades like the ones you wield before. They only bring pain and destruction.’ 

Havre looked away. 

‘But I must show gratitude towards you, even if you didn’t deliberately plan to free us from Goghdak.’ Once she said that, one of the natives walked into the room, holding a wooden tray with three carved out cups and put it on the floor before the Cerean. He bowed before them and said something inaudible. 

‘This is Harfk. He was to be sacrificed today, for the Goghdak not to attack us during harvest. He wishes to thank you for saving his life.’ the woman said and waved at Harfk, dismissing him. He left quietly, whining something that could have been interpreted as thanks. ‘Go ahead, drink it.’ She said and took one of the cups in her hand. ‘This is Fetseed tea, for you to nourish.’ 

Havre and Ren hesitated for a moment, but both being really thirsty, finally gave in and tasted the drink. It was rather sour, and reminded Havre of grass.

‘If you want to leave this place, you will have to get to a machine city down south.’ the woman said, after emptying her cup. ‘The map which will lead you there is stored in that case behind you.’ She said to Ren and pointed to a wooden chest against the wall. He reached inside and took out a metallic cube. When he pressed its sides, a ragged holographic map displayed above it.

‘I cannot help you in any other way. Please leave us now and do not come back.’ she said, when Ren put the map inside his pocket. 

‘We won’t.’ He said and left the hut, hunching down. Havre hesitated for a moment. The Cerean looked at her curiously. 

‘I-’ Havre opened her mouth, but didn’t exactly know what she wanted to say. ‘Wouldn’t you want the map back?’

‘No.’ The Cerean said strongly. ‘I kept that map for barter. With you, goes away the last piece of the machines that was in our village. I am glad it is gone now.’ 

Havre just nodded and turned to the door.

‘You are not like the other one, are you?’ She heard the Cerean say and looked back at her. The woman was squinting her eyes and Havre felt them pierce through her body. A weird shiver passed her shoulders and Havre quickly backed away from the Cerean. 

‘I-ah...Thank you for the map…’ She muttered as a goodbye and quickly left the shack. She wanted to get as far from the strange woman as possible.

‘Let’s go.’ She said, quickly walking past Ren, who was waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs leading into the hut. He nodded and headed behind her. 

As they were leaving the village, followed by dozens of pairs of eyes and whispers, Havre felt a little off. She took a quick look back at the village and saw the Cerean woman standing outside her hut. She was leaning on her staff and Havre could feel her grey eyes set on her. “I’m imagining things…” she thought to herself and walked out through the hidden entrance.

***

‘Are you sure we’re going the right way?’ Havre asked, when Ren, who was holding the map, for the fourth time made a sudden turn. It was mid-day and they had been walking for over two hours. Ren stopped and looked at Havre with irritation. ‘We should be getting out of the forest by now but it seems to me that we’re going deeper into it…’

‘Yes, I’m sure.’ Ren sighed and headed through the trees. But with every step he took, Havre could’ve sworn the vines and bushes around them grew thicker and thicker. Ren was walking fast, taking steady, long steps and ripping any branch blocking his way, while Havre tried to slip under and in between the tangled thicket. She tried to stay positive, thinking that they were just going through the last rough patch before a clear way to some kind of city, but after a couple of minutes, the jungle became so dense it didn’t seem right. 

Ren must have also noticed that, because he stopped and took another look at the map.

‘There must be something wrong with this map…’ he said and shook it in his hand, as if it would fix it somehow. 

‘What?’ Havre sighed, waiting for the worst.

‘It can’t be accurate, cause we should be close to the city by now…’

‘Like I said…’ Havre took a step towards Ren and her foot landed on something weirdly soft and squishy. She looked down and saw that she stepped on some kind of a green root that seemed to be… pulsating. ‘What the…’ she muttered under her breath, quickly taking her foot off the weird plant. 

‘Cause if we’re here… then the city’s highway should be… Ah, I can’t see anything through these... bloody... plants!’ Ren ignited his saber and swang it through the tangled branches before him. Havre noticed something moving next to his head, curling up away from the place he cut through with his lightsaber. It was the same strange pulsating plant...

‘Maybe we missed some passage or one of those tunnels…’ Ren talked to himself, as Havre’s eyes widened anxiously. 

‘Ren…’

‘What?’ He raised his head from above the holographic map with irritation. 

‘Can you hear that?’

‘Hear what?’ He frowned in confusion and they stayed quiet for a moment. ‘I can’t hear anything.’

‘Yeah, me neither.’ Havre said and Ren for a second looked at her with a question written on his face, but then he realized. 

‘Where did all the birds go…?’

‘I don’t… Ah!’ Havre gasped, as she felt something wrap around her leg. She impulsively reached for her saber, and cut the strange thing off her leg. As it fell flat on the ground, she saw that it was one of the long, strange pulsating plants. And when she looked up, her stomach sunk. Wherever she looked, she saw the same plants, that now, she realized looked more like tentacles… Hanging from the trees and bushes, creeping on the ground...

‘What the hell was that?! AHH’ Ren yelled. The green tentacles suddenly launched from behind and wrapped around his stomach. He tried to push it off, but it seemed to be stronger than his arms. Havre now realized that everything around them was moving… They walked straight into a giant snare… 

Ren struggled to get the tentacles off his stomach, but before he could ignite his saber, more of them reached out behind him and in a matter of seconds wrapped around his arms. 

‘REN!’ Havre yelled, as the plant began to pull him up and deeper into the woods.

‘Run!’ she heard his muffled cry, as his legs disappeared behind the bushes. 

‘NO!’ Havre leaped towards him, but the tentacles already tied around her legs, tripped her over and she fell face down onto the ground. She ignited her saber and started to cut everything around her, blindfolded. But as the ties around her legs let go and she struggled to get up, the tentacles seemed to already be growing everywhere around her. They gripped onto her arms and legs with irresistible strength, so fast she didn’t even have a second to resist. She felt them drag her down, sinking into the ground, tying around her tighter with every motion she made. Havre tried to ignite her sabers, but at this point, she couldn’t even make out if she was still holding them in her hands. 

‘Ren!’ she yelled, but she couldn’t hear her own voice over the grinding sound of thousands of tentacles tangled around her. And as she thought there is no way she could get out of this, she suddenly was reminded of her last hope… 

Havre closed her eyes and reached out to the Force. As she fell into the white void in her head, the fear and anxiety faded, as if it was pushed into the background and the sounds around her became muffled. After a quick moment, she couldn’t even feel the tentacles tied around her body. It was only her in the void, focused, closed off from the world, calm and steady. She stopped struggling and somehow felt the Force around her, inside of her body, and in the tentacles around her.

‘Let go of me.’ She said slowly. ‘I will not hurt you.’ Something inside her void shifted, she heard a strange sound, similar to a howl of the wind, formed into some kind of word. She didn’t know what it was saying, but somehow she understood it. ‘Let me go.’ 

And when she opened her eyes, she saw the tentacles around her untangling slowly and at the same time pushing her up above the ground. 

‘Thank you…’ she whispered as the plant put her down on her feet and retrieved into the forest. Amazed by what she had done, Havre stood there frozen for a minute, but then a realization skimmed her head…

‘Ren!’ She yelled and leaped forward into the bushes where the monster had pulled him. ‘Ren!’ 

She broke through the branches and stopped immediately, sucking in her breath. Before her, spread in between the trees, a few meters above the ground, tangled the green tentacles, forming a large cocoon in the middle. ‘REN!’ she yelled and leaped forward, but the tentacles pushed her away in such force, she fell onto the ground. ‘Can you hear me?!’ 

But there was no answer. She ignited her saber, but as soon as she did that, the monstrous plant started to also crawl towards her, as if in a warning. She had promised she wouldn’t hurt it… But if Ren was still alive…

Havre closed her eyes and opened her mind to the Force. She could still sense him. He was struggling inside the cocoon, trying to break his way through the tentacles. 

‘Ren.’ She spoke to him, through his mind. ‘Listen to me, Ren.’

‘Havre…!’ She heard his voice after a moment, it was a little distorted, as if coming through a radio. Havre let out a sigh of relief. 

‘Ren, I can get you out, but you have to listen to me very carefully. You need to stop struggling.’

‘It’s… It’s suffocating me, I can’t…’

‘Please, this is the only way you can come out of this. You need to trust me, I will guide you. Close your eyes. You need to close off from your fear. Like you’re meditating. Detach your mind, close it off... and surrender to the Force…’ Havre tried to speak calmly and clearly, but she could still feel his anxiety and anger inside his mind. ‘This is possible, just listen to my voice and let go.’ 

Slowly, she could sense a shift in his Force field. ‘That’s it, just… Now close your mind, control your emotions. You can’t attack, just surrender and stay calm.’ Another slow, unstable shift. ‘You can do this, Ren, if I could, you can too.’ 

And right after those words, suddenly, their bond was broken. Havre quickly opened her eyes and saw the tentacles forming the cocoon started moving faster. 

‘No…’ She muttered and clenched her eyes again, desperately trying to reach Ren again. ‘Please…’

But there was nothing. She couldn’t feel him anymore. He was gone…

And at once, she felt a stinging feeling of desperation. She reached for her sabers and ignited them quickly. The plant’s tentacles turned to her once again, but this time she didn’t care. And just as she swung her sabers in the air, prepared to attack the monster, the tentacles around the cocoon slowly started to untangle. 

Havre froze in motion, watching as the plant gradually lowered down from in between the trees and finally crawled out into the bushes, leaving Ren standing on the ground, panting. 

When he opened his eyes and looked at Havre, she felt as if a heavy stone was lifted from her. 

‘I-I thought you were dead…’ she said, disigniting her sabers. 

‘I thought so too…’ he muttered. ‘How do you keep doing that…?’ he asked with a subtle, confused smile. 

‘Doing what?’ 

‘Rescuing me.’

‘The real question is, why do I have to keep doing it.’ Havre raised her eyebrows and looked away, suddenly feeling a strange emotion in her chest. 

‘That damned Cerean…’ Ren sighed and looked around, rubbing his arms where the tentacles had gripped him. ‘She led us straight into this trap...’

‘Guess you can’t expect anyone to help people like us.’ Havre muttered, strapping her sabers back onto her thighs.

‘We didn’t kill that massive toad to be gracious.’ Ren scoffed and walked up to Havre, minding his step for any tentacles that could still lay there. 

‘We better get out of here before that thing gets out again...’

‘But which way? That map is useless, and for all, we know it just stirred us deeper into this jungle…’

Havre sighed and looked around.

‘I have no idea…’

But as soon as she said that, they heard a familiar sound coming from a near distance. 

‘That’s a speeder…!’ Havre perked up. 

They both picked up their pace and ran towards the sound, through the thickets. And indeed, as they broke through the bushes, a few meters away in between the trees, slowly flew a speeder bike.

‘Hey!’ Havre yelled and waved her hands. The driver must have heard her voice, because the bike made a turn and sped up towards them. As it got closer, they realized the speeder was driven by a built-in astromech droid. When they got closer to the speeder, the droid stuck out a scanning device and ran in on their faces. As the scan was complete, the droid beeped a few words. 

‘It says it has been looking for us.’ Havre said, confused.

‘I heard.’ Ren walked closer to the droid. It didn’t look like a First-Order-made robot, painted in bright yellow color. ‘Either we’re on a bounty list, or the trooper squad on this Planet found our ship.’

‘That, or Snoke knows we failed and sent someone looking for us.’ Havre muttered. Ren sent her a quick look. ‘Either way, it’s the best way of getting out of this cursed place.’ She said and got onto the back of the speeder. Ren was hesitant, but after a moment sat next to her and the droid set off into the jungle. 


	13. Following the Force

* * *

‘Oh, good, we have found our stray.’ Armitage Hux’s snippy voice welcomed Havre and Ren in front of the transport shuttle. It had landed next to a small trooper base that shadowed over a small prairie town built just a kilometer outside the jungle. Havre thought that if not for the speeder, they wouldn’t have found it on their own.

‘Great, so he’s here…’ Ren muttered with irritation. As soon as they both jumped out of the bike, the droid headed towards the town, passing a trooper squadron standing outside the shuttle. When they approached him, the general made an exaggerated expression to mark how badly both of them smelled. Havre rolled her eyes, biting on the response she had on the tip of her tongue. 

‘Supreme Leader has a message for you.’ Hux said with a malice voice, when Havre and Ren walked with him onto the bridge of the ship. The staff and pilots seating inside of the cockpit sent them short glances, but then quickly turned to their jobs, trying not to seem bothered.

‘And you hope he’s calling to give you an award for doing a good job for once?’ Ren scoffed and rolled his eyes picking up a cup of water handed them by a serving droid.

‘Actually, I don’t think I would like to be on your end of the call this time, Ren.’ Hux narrowed his eyes and sent him a short mean smile. Ren held the general's gaze for a moment, until Hux looked away. 

‘We’ll take it in our quarters.’ Ren said and turned to Havre, who just nodded in agreement.

‘Be ready in ten.’ Hux said, as they were already walking away. ‘The transmission will be connected as soon as we leave the atmosphere.’

‘We know.’ Ren asserted shortly.

The shuttle they were on was even bigger than the one that they left the Supremacy in. Havre and Ren were both given their own chamber, with a compact bathroom. Inside of her room, Havre found a fresh set of robes and food rations she immediately devoured, as the last food she had in her mouth was a small portion of meat in the morning. The artificial taste of the ration brought her mind back to the reality that she managed to escape for the two days Ren and her maundered around the jungle. In that time, she had almost forgotten that she had a plan to go after that Jedi... And now, that she was back in one of the cold chambers of a First Order ship, on her way back to Snoke, with no idea where the Jedi was, it all seemed like a dream that slipped between her fingers.

She quickly washed the dust and the horrible smell of the forest off her body and put on the fresh, black robes. As she tightened her lightsabers onto the belt around her waist, she felt the shuttle lift off. She looked out the small window carved in the wall, observing how the planet started to gradually shrink as they quickly picked up the speed.

Suddenly, she heard a knock on the door.

‘Come in.’ she said, straightening up. The blast door opened and Ren stepped inside. He was dressed in the same set of robes she had on. ‘What is it?’

‘Snoke wants to see us both. Now.’ He stressed. Havre felt an anxious shift in her stomach and cleared her throat, trying not to show how nervous she actually got.

‘Right…’ she muttered and followed Ren out of the room. As they walked, side by side down the corridor, she calmed down her breath, preparing her mind for the unpleasant interaction. She sensed that Ren was also as uncomfortable as her. He walked stiff, clenching his jaw nervously. They turned into another, short corridor, and Ren stopped in front of one of the blast doors.

‘Ready?’ he asked and sent her a quick glance.

‘Probably not.’ She answered jokingly and when the door opened, they stepped into the room together.

As their knees touched the ground, the light inside the empty chamber dimmed, and before them appeared a holographic figure of the Supreme Leader.

Havre quickly bowed her head, trying to avoid eye contact with her master.

‘Finally.’ Snoke’s dreadful hiss pierced her chest. ‘I was beginning to think you were dead.’

Havre and Ren stayed silent.

‘How is it… That I send both of my apprentices on one mission…’ Snoke growled. ‘and they manage to fail me so miserably?’

‘Supreme Leader, I take full respon-’ Ren started, but Snoke’s shout cut him off.

‘SILENCE!’ he roared. ‘Don’t make me punish you more than I already plan to, Ren! I have put faith in your skills, but now I see you have begun to disregard my commands! Do you have any idea how pitiful it is that you crashed your ship chasing a… starfighter!’ Snoke raised his voice and stood up in his seat. Even though he was so far away from them, Havre could still feel his dark energy surrounding and overpowering her. ‘As to you… Havre,’ he drawled her name in hate. ‘you turned out to be even more useless than I could have imagined… you might consider this as your last warning…’

Snoke waved his hand and Havre suddenly felt an unbearable pain shoot her in the stomach and she dropped to the floor, howling in ache. Ren frowned and turned his eyes away from her agony, as Snoke tortured her endlessly. Havre had never felt such pain, as if something was burning the flesh inside of her body. She couldn’t contain herself from screaming, clenching her eyes, and writhing on the floor. And at the moment she thought she would pass out, Snoke let her go.

‘If it wasn’t for Hux, the Jedi would escape me again!’ Snoke hissed, sitting back at the throne. Havre couldn’t stand up again. She lay on the ground motionless, embracing her stomach, which was still pulsating with pain. ‘I’m sending my guards after him to Flean... You should pray that they do better than the both of you... If we lose him again, that will be entirely your fault.’ And with these words, the transmission was turned off. The hologram disappeared and the lights inside of the chamber gradually lit up again.

Ren instantly lunged towards Havre and she felt his hands gently embracing her arms, as he carefully helped her sit up.

‘Are you okay?’ he muttered, as she groaned in pain and fell onto his arm. Through half-closed eyelids, she couldn't make out if she imagined it or not, but his eyes seemed to be filled with genuine aghast. 

‘Sorry I-’ she gasped out and tried to support herself on her hands, but Ren just took her arm over his shoulder and slowly picked her up off the floor, letting her rest on his side. He took her out of the room and carefully led her to his chamber. There, he put her down on the built-in bed.

‘I will get you a stym.’ he muttered and turned around to reach one of the cabinets on the wall.

‘It’s fine…’ Havre sighed, feeling that the pain was gradually numbing out. ‘I’m okay.’

But Ren insisted she take the stym anyway and sat next to her on the bed. He took her arm in his hands, tucked her sleeve up a few inches, and gently injected the green liquid into her veins.

Havre immediately felt a rush of energy and the pain in her stomach eased. She inhaled slowly, closing her eyes.

‘Thank you.’ she said under her breath.

They stayed quiet for a long moment. Havre’s thoughts were for once running slowly, maybe it was because of the medicine, but she felt calm and relaxed.

‘Havre.’ Ren suddenly broke the silence and turned to her slowly. She looked back at him and noticed his eyes glowed in a strange flicker. ‘I need you to tell me the truth.’

‘What...?’ Havre muttered and straightened up slowly. ‘What do you mean?’

‘The truth, Havre.’ He looked straight into her eyes and she couldn’t look away. Her stomach tightened. ‘About why you’re here.’

‘What do you…’ she started to repeat herself, but Ren just shook his head.

‘Just tell me.’

‘I have no idea what you’re talking about, Ren.’

‘Don’t lie.’ he muttered. ‘I can’t be wrong. I sense it.’ he narrowed his eyes. ‘I don’t think you wanted to be Snoke’s apprentice. Am I wrong?’

Havre frowned, not knowing what to say. She started to shake her head, but Ren stopped her.

‘You don’t have to hide it from me.’ He said, lowering his voice. ‘I still don’t know how you hid it from Snoke, but… I know… That you lied to him. I understand. You lied to him, so you could live… You didn’t kill The Descendants so you could stand before him, you never intended to…’ his eyes scanned her face. She was unable to stop him. ‘I am not wrong, am I?’ His voice wasn’t angry or hateful, but somehow calm, almost hopeful. Havre slowly shook her head “no” and she watched his eyes lit up. ‘You wanted to be free…’

She still sat in silence, unable to think of anything to say. The only sound reaching their ears now was the steady hissing of the shuttle and distant voices coming from the bridge. _How did he know? How did he sense it?_

‘That day on Jedha…’ Ren started. ‘When I was unconscious… You did something with the Force and… I saw it.’

‘Saw what…?’ Havre muttered.

‘A vision.’ he said. ‘I saw what we are meant to be... what we are capable of… Havre, I saw the future.’ he whispered. ‘Your future. And mine.’

‘What are you talking about…?’

‘I can show it to you.’ he said and reached out his hand. Havre didn’t move. His eyes were wide open, she had never seen this expression on his face. ‘Please.’

Slowly, not sure why, Havre also pulled out her hand. Ren gently grabbed her wrist and after a brief hesitation, she grabbed his.

Suddenly, a wave of heat brushed over her and she felt strong energy entering her mind, unyielding and dark. Havre thought she would want to resent it, but no… She felt herself wanting to get closer to it... Then, as the power overwhelmed her, a series of visions started to flash in front of her eyes.

She saw herself, standing in the red throne room, bearing a two-bladed lightsaber. Ren stood beside her, hand in hand, and beneath their feet, she saw Snoke’s head, decapitated from his body.

Then the vision changed. She saw herself leading an army of endless soldiers under her command, every single one of them ready to die in her name. She saw them conquering the galaxy, creating a new order.

She saw she could breed life, clones, and servants. She was the master of life… and death. Sitting on a throne, the ruler of the Galaxy… hand in hand with Ren.

A cold wave brushed onto her, as she let go of his wrist and was brought back to reality. She was out of breath, panting, wide-eyed. She looked at Ren with a mixture of opposite emotions and saw his eyes filled with passion. He looked mad... out of control. It repulsed her and she instinctively backed away.

‘I-I…’ she mumbled, stupored and quickly stood up from the bed. Ren followed her with his gaze.

‘Havre. The Force had put you here… It’s your destiny. I can feel it... Can’t you?’

Havre didn’t answer and stared at the ground to avoid eye contact. 

‘Snoke it losing his grip. It is time for us to take charge. It’s time for Snoke to die. We can kill him together. And then... we will finally be free.’ He said slowly, and Havre raised her head, looking straight into his eyes. ‘That is what you wanted.’

Havre nodded slowly. She saw his eyes gleaming with passion, fueled by something of a mix of hatred and hope, so powerful it was almost tangible.

‘This is our chance. His guards are after Kestis.’

Suddenly, this name made Havre shook off her stupor. _The Jedi…_

Ren stood up, opening his mouth to say something else, but Havre impulsively backed away to the door.

‘I-I have to do something…’ She mumbled and stumbled out of the room, ignoring his confusion.

She ran through the empty corridors to her chambers, blindfolded by everything boiling inside of her head. She needed to be alone. Focus. Figure it all out…

Panting, she stumbled into her quarters and sat next to the bed, taking steady, deep breaths. Everything that Ren showed her was so real… But the Jedi… She needed to find him first. Stop Snoke’s guards… But then she thought back to the vision… Was it really her future? Their future?

‘I can’t think about this right now…’ she muttered to herself. ‘I need to find that Jedi…’

She frantically looked around the room, not knowing what she was looking for, but then a genius thought skimmed her head.

‘The escape pods…’ she whispered and jumped to her feet. She grabbed a passkey sticking out of the panel next to the blast door and a food ration she stuck inside her pocket. She rushed outside again and headed down the corridor intuitively, as if something was guiding her. No troopers were in her way, no guards or officers. The corridors were clear. She felt calm, focused. She knew she was doing the right thing, somehow in spite of her conflicted thoughts.

The escape pods were located on the ground level next to the cargo compartments. Havre reached them uninterrupted and thought that probably nobody was even going to notice her leaving, but then…

‘Havre?’ Ren’s voice reached her from behind. She turned around and saw his eyes looking at the escape pod and then back at her with confusion. ‘What are you doing?’

Then again, she felt a sudden impulse and walked closer to him. He backed away half a step, but his gaze was still fixed on her. She inhaled slowly and reached out her hand to touch his chest.

‘What are you do-’ he started, but suddenly stopped, feeling the Force leave her fingers. Havre looked into his eyes, seeing the passion inside of them slowly fading, as she was calming him down with her Force. He opened and closed his mouth noiselessly and suddenly stumbled and dropped to the floor with a stupored expression on his face.

‘I’m sorry…’ Havre whispered and leaned over him.‘I have to do this… I’ll come back…’

She heard troopers heading their way and quickly jumped up and lunged to the escape pods. She pushed in the passkey and quickly opened the hatch. Taking the last look at Ren laying motionless on the floor, she felt something gripping in her chest. Her hand lingered on the rim of the hatch, but there was no time for hesitation. The troopers were drawing near and she could hear their footsteps on the way to the lounge, so she pulled herself together and jumped into the pod. With just a few clicks, the capsule was ejected from the shuttle and in a minute, Havre was floating away in space. 


	14. Gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A chapter from Kylo's perspective.

#  **Gone**

* * *

_ All he saw was a white void. It reminded him of something… it felt like a glimpse of a lost memory that started to come back to him, but before it did, Kylo opened his eyes, looking up onto a familiar, dark ceiling. The sensation, brought by the white emptiness started to wear off, but he could still feel it for a moment, like an aftertaste of a good, long sleep… Something he hadn’t had in years. _

_ ‘Commander Ren.’ A neutral-toned voice of a medical droid reached his ears. ‘You have been unconscious, your vital status is in a good condition. You do not require any more medical assistance.’ _

_ He sat up on the bed and looked around the medical chamber. And suddenly it all came back to him. _

_ ‘Havre…’ he muttered under his breath and his fists clenched uncontrollably. His mind was at once flooded with anger, covering up a very unpleasant feeling that appeared when the image of the girl walking into the escape pod flashed before his eyes.  _

_ She left him... _

_ Kylo jumped from the bed and pushing the medical droid away, stormed out into the hall of the shuttle.  _

_ ‘HUX!’ he roared, walking onto the bridge of the ship. The red-haired general jumped up startled, when Kylo’s hand tightened painfully around his arm. _

_ ‘Ren.’ the general cleared his throat, frowning his nostrils nervously, seeing the raging face of the Supreme Leader’s apprentice. ‘I see you-’ _

_ ‘THE ESCAPE POD!’ Ren shouted. ‘DID YOU STOP IT?!’ _

_ ‘The... escape pod?’ Hux muttered, but then his face was skimmed with a realizing expression. ‘Ah. Yes.’ he tore his arm from Ren’s grip. ‘You had been unconscious for quite some time. We had shot it down already.’ _

_ Kylo’s face, fueled with rage just a second ago, suddenly fell blank.  _

_ ‘I have been warned that this kind of situation might occur and been told to follow the protocol.’ Hux raised his eyebrows, unbothered, looking away into the space void through the large cockpit windows. _

_ ‘What... situation?’ Kylo growled out, his brows slowly frowned. The realization hadn’t yet fully hit him... _

_ ‘That your…’ Hux sent him a quick glance from above a high raised brow, filled with poorly hidden disdain. ‘accomplice... might chance to desert the ship.’ _

_ ‘Sir, we have received the new coordinates for the capitol.’ a voice of a female bridge officer cut it.  _

_ ‘Good.’ Hux used this opportunity to walk a few steps away from Ren. ‘Prepare the jump for hyperspace.’ he gave the order. _

_ ‘You… destroyed that pod…?’ Kylo muttered, as his eyes widened with overflowing anger, targeted at Havre just a second ago, now utterly fixed on Hux. The general looked at him and suddenly, a mockingly pitiful grimace stretched his face.  _

_ ‘Huh.’ he said lightly. ‘You don’t look so intimidating without that mask covering your face.’ _

_ Kylo’s hand trembled around his lightsaber hilt and once Hux noticed that, his face fell with a shadow of anxiety.  _

_ ‘Don’t be a fool now, Ren.’ he muttered and his hand waved over the blaster attached to his belt. They were standing in such distance, that Kylo knew Hux had the upper hand. ‘We are just following his orders…’  _

_ Kylo at once relaxed his hand and turned around on his heels to leave the bridge, with every strength trying to control a sudden urge to ram his saber through Hux’s chest.  _

_ When the blast door of his chamber closed behind him, he stood in place for a long moment, trying to prevail over the chaos inside of him. But it was simply too much. His knees touched the ground and he stumbled down to the floor. A rough, uncontrollable pain of raging anger filled his lungs and he put his arms around his face, holding on to his neck, placing his forehead against the cold metal floor. His heavy breath trembled as his chest tore apart with emotions he couldn’t understand. His back shook with a shiver, as he choked on his breath.  _

_ She was dead. _

_ ‘Why…’ he drawled, through clenched teeth. He couldn’t understand. Why… Why did she reject him… why he felt this way… and why, once it was all gone, he couldn’t calm down. At once, the vision he encountered on Jedha seemed like a distant dream, or a memory. Was it all just a mistake...? Once again the picture of Havre standing beside the escape pod appeared under his closed eyes and suddenly, as he remembered something else, a stinging pain pierced through his heart.  _

_ "I will come back..." _

_ His eyes widened. _

_ Kylo put his hand over his chest in the place her fingers left her Force mark.  _

_ That’s right… She wanted to come back. He remembered everything clearly now. When he showed her the vision of their future, their thoughts… feelings were in unison. Havre didn’t resent it, and so… now… was everything ruined... because Hux gave the order to shoot down that escape pod? _

_ Kylo clenched his fists, trying to control himself from grabbing his saber and killing the general right there on the spot. _

_ ‘No…’ he thought, closing his eyes slowly and letting out a somewhat calming breath. ‘I will destroy Snoke first...’ _


	15. Cal Kestis

#  Cal Kestis

* * *

Four red shadows moved quickly, one by one through a long, narrow bridge stretched over the sea. Their steps drowned in the murmur of the emerald water crashing in waves into the metallic walls of four vastly scattered ovoid fisherman cabins floating on its surface. The shadows stopped on a crossroad, from which the bridge split into four parts, each one heading towards one of the cabins. The figure that appeared to be leading the others, put up its hand in the air, and gave the others a sign. The shadows headed down the bridges, each one in a different direction. Their crimson capes brushed up by the wind stood out against the greenish-blue backdrop of the sea stretching to the horizon of the water planet.

‘Greetings.’ a voice came from behind them and the four silhouettes quickly turned around drawing their weapons. On the other side of the bridge stood a hooded man, wearing what appeared to be a fisherman poncho. ‘I’m assuming you’re looking for me. Or did you drop here for a quick cast?’

The leading praetorian guard, whose hand was clenched on a double-bladed red spear, took a step towards the Jedi.

‘Target number 8A7. Drop your weapon and surrender in our hands.’

‘Drop the theatrics, will you?’ the man scoffed and straightened his arm, drawing his green lightsaber. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’

The first praetorian guard, standing closest to the man launched towards him, but was quickly swept off his feet and pushed into the water with the man’s single hand movement. The guard struggled to stay on the water surface, but his heavy armor quickly began to pull him under.

‘Anyone else?’ the Jedi asked, when only bubbles of air on the water were what was left of the guard. ‘I don’t have all day.’

The three figures stood in their positions for a few seconds. One of them suddenly put his hand in the air and in a quick motion threw a long, red lasso in the man’s direction. The Jedi jumped up in the air, and with a somersault, missed the lasso’s end that swished underneath his feet. When he landed back onto the bridge, he pulled out both his hands and in a single motion pushed out two of the guards into the water.

‘How easy is this?’ he laughed, when the last guard stood before him on the other side of the bridge. ‘Come on,’ the Jedi sighed. ‘you know what I’m going to do.’

The guard clenched their fists on the large spear he handled and with a quick swish threw it into the Jedi, who ducked at the last second, dodging it just an inch.

‘Ha. Missed.’ he smirked, straightening up. ‘It was close though.’ And with those words, he pushed the last opponent into the sea. ‘Hope the fish won’t choke on your armor…’ he sighed and turned off his lightsaber, tucking it to the belt around his waist. He turned around to look at the dark TIE-fighter landing on the large platform built on the end of the narrow bridge. He walked over to it and carefully checked the cockpit for any more unexpected intruders. But the ship was empty. The guards must have been planning a quick comeback to their base, as they didn’t even take any cargo. The Jedi stepped into the cockpit and suddenly froze in motion, listening. Then, as if something had bitten him, he lunged out of the ship, quickly running away from the landing platform. He got out of the way just in time, before a white escape pod covered in a cloud of smoke came crashing down onto the TIE ship, smashing it, and the landing platform into pieces and burying it deep into the ocean.

‘Woah.’ the Jedi muttered under his breath, watching as the metal scraps of the starship drowned, bubbling up the surface. Suddenly, something let out a puffing sound and the escape pod floated up onto the surface, embraced by a white piece of fabric that gradually inflated, creating a built-in pontoon. ‘Huh.’ The Jedi murmured. ‘We didn’t have that in our time.’ He carefully walked up to the pod, but then stopped, as the hatch suddenly opened with a hissing sound and from it reached out an arm.

The Jedi slowly backed away a step and froze, when his gaze met with two, wide-open brown eyes.

The two people looked at each other for a quiet moment.

‘You’re late.’ the Jedi said eventually. ‘I was beginning to think you’re not coming.’

Havre opened her mouth and closed it, dumbfounded. What kind of response was that for crashing into someone’s ship?

‘The guards…’ she mumbled out eventually. ‘We have to get out of here, before…’

‘You mean the guards, into whose ship you just crashed?’ the Jedi raised his eyebrows and looked behind the escape pod, where some parts of the TIE were still floating in the emerald water. Havre frowned with confusion, when the Jedi turned around and slowly began walking away from the pod. ‘Come on.’ He yelled at her. ‘I cooked soup.’

‘Soup…?’ Havre muttered under her breath and crawled out of the escape pod. She had to jump over to the bridge, as her landing destroyed the docking platform entirely. When she straightened her back, standing on the narrow dock, a cold salty wind brushed against her cheek and a shiver past her spine. Careful, with her hands near her sabers, she followed the Jedi through the bridge. When passing the crossroad of the dock, something in the water caught her attention and she saw a red-armored body floating motionlessly a few meters away from her feet. She felt a lump in her throat. The guards… How powerful was that Jedi…? She gripped one of her sabers and looked ahead, seeing the old man’s back disappear inside of one of the fisherman cabins. The strange ovoid accommodation couldn’t be more than four meters high, and judging from the distance, the inside must have been really small. It was made out of metal, that once must have been shiny, now only partially reflected the sea, covered in green-red rust.

She walked over to it carefully, awaiting any possible trap hiding inside. With her saber ignited, she opened the heavy metal door and was met with an intense smell of fish.

‘Woah, Woah,’ the Jedi looked up at her, from above a steaming pot sitting on a portable stove put on a small metal table sticking out from the cabin’s wall. ‘Do you mind putting it down?’ he asked, pointing his finger at her saber. ‘At least for dinner?’

Havre stood in the door, confused. She looked around the inside of the small cabin. Apart from fishing nets stretched above their heads, rods placed on their stands, and other fisherman equipment, she didn’t see any traps, or even anything looking remotely dangerous.

‘Look, I’m going to put mine down too.’ The Jedi said and reached for his lightsaber. Havre twitched, when his hand touched the hilt, but he didn’t ignite it, and just like he said, put it down on the floor. Havre hesitated for a second, but then turned her weapon off and put it down on the strap on her thigh. ‘Thank you.’ The Jedi said and unbothered, leaned to the pot to smell the boiling broth. ‘That’s it.’ he muttered and turned off the heat. ‘Sit down, won’t you?’ He said calmly, pointing to a wooden stool on the other side of the table. Havre glanced at him and carefully took her seat.

The Jedi pulled out two carved out wooden bowls and poured the soup into them.

‘That crash looked nasty, are you alright?’ he asked, handing her one of the bowls. Havre didn’t take it, so he just put it down on the table in front of her. ‘Guess you should wait, it’s still hot.’

‘Listen, I didn’t come here to chat.’ Havre stated. ‘I’m here for answers.’

Kestis looked up at her and snorted a quick laugh.

‘Sorry…’ He apologized, smirking. ‘Are you in any hurry?’ Havre frowned, confusedly in response. ‘Because I don’t think you can be, knowing you crashed into the only ship that was on this planet.’

‘What…?’ she muttered, watching the Jedi calmly sipping on his soup. ‘You said that was the guardsman ship. Where’s that starfighter you took?’

‘Let’s just say it’s unusable anymore.’ the Jedi sighed. ‘That’s some good soup, are you sure you don’t want any?’ he asked, pointing to her bowl.

‘No.’

‘Well, we’re gonna be here a while, you should eat something.’ the Jedi smiled at her politely. Havre looked the other way. She felt strange. This wasn’t how she imagined their meeting to go. The Jedi finished his meal and put his bowl aside, relaxing in his seat. He observed Havre with half-closed eyes. ‘So,’ he started, on a more serious note, and leaned in closer, resting his elbows on the table. ‘Why are you here, young one?’

Havre didn’t answer right away, a little taken aback by his eyes studying her face. Finally, she cleared her throat and crossed her arms over her chest.

‘You said you knew who I was.’ she said. The Jedi tilted his head to the side and frowned, as if he was thinking about something earnestly.

‘Is that really the only question you come to me with?’ he asked and when Havre didn’t answer, he sighed and smiled politely. ‘I guess you lacked time to think things through. That’s alright. I’m not in a hurry.’ He stood up. ‘I will leave you to rest now. There are some clean blankets over there in the corner. I hope to be able to answer all of your questions in the morning.’

‘What?’ Havre stood up in protest. ‘I don’t…!’

‘Take as long as you need. The fish are taking this time of the day.’ he said zestfully and grabbed one of the fishing rods off the wall. ‘Hope the guards didn’t scare them off…’ he muttered under his breath and before Havre could react, he had already left the cabin.

She sat back on the stool, helpless and dumbfounded, looking at the door, in which the Jedi had disappeared. This was all completely strange to her. She risked her life twice to see this man, had her escape pod shot into, miraculously surviving a crash and he acted as if she had just dropped by for dinner? This was nothing even remotely close to how she thought a Jedi would act. But in all of this… he was right. She just now realized how many questions were tangled in her mind… And yes, she was extremely hungry. She sighed and looked at the steaming bowl of the delicious looking soup and then back at the door. Finally, she sighed and grabbed the bowl.

‘Damn, that’s good…’ she muttered, when she swallowed the last drops of the broth. She couldn’t remember the last time she had eaten a home-cooked meal instead of the tasteless rations given out by the First Order. The soup warmed her body and she suddenly felt how tired she was. She hadn’t had a chance to rest her eyes for almost two days now… Her whole body was still sore from the long flight in the uncomfortable escape pod and the crash had roughed her up pretty badly. She looked at the neatly folded blankets in the corner of the cabin, but then shook her head. “No, I can’t go to sleep when the Jedi is just outside.” she thought to herself. “He’s probably waiting for me to let down my guard and…”. But as soon as she thought that, she realized that somehow, she couldn’t imagine the man hurting her in any way. She wasn’t sure why, but just like the day she rescued him from Supremacy, she felt calm, as if she was sure she was in the right place. 

She was on a deserted water planet, guested by a Jedi, the Sith’s natural enemy, and yet, her instincts reassured her that she ended up exactly where she was supposed to be. Neither the less, she stood up with intention of barricading herself inside, but then stopped in half a step, almost tripping over something laying on the floor. She looked down and saw the Jedi’s lightsaber. She blinked in a stupor and picked the weapon off the ground. Weighing it in her hand she looked back at the door. Why would he leave it there...? She ignited the saber to check if it truly was his real weapon. As the green light of the saber illuminated the room, Havre felt a familiar shiver go from her hand to her shoulders.

‘There it is again…’ she whispered, turning the saber off and carefully putting it on the table.

Since the Jedi was unarmed, Havre decided to lay down just for a few minutes just to rest her eyes. She tried to stay conscious, but when she laid her head on the blankets, she felt so tired it was overwhelming.

‘Just for a moment…’ she muttered and turned to her side and it wasn’t until the morning when she realized for how long she had been sleeping. And how good of a sleep it was. Staring at the ceiling of the pokey cabin, laying on a pallet made out of blankets that smelled awfully like fish, Havre wondered how in this place so far from comfort she had in her Supremacy quarters, where she could hardly close her eyes, here she felt uncannily relaxed. Her body and mind were so at peace, that when she slowly sat up, it seemed to her that she was seeing everything through a new pair of eyes.

The Jedi was sitting at the far end of the dock. Once he heard the metal door of the cabin close behind Havre, he turned to her and waved. Havre looked up at the sky. The two suns were just rising, it must have been very early.

‘Sit down, have some breakfast.’ Kestis said, once she approached him, and pointed to a wide wooden bowl next to him. ‘Surprise! It’s fish.’

‘I’m not hungry.’ Havre said, observing how the Jedi calmly ate the food, as if her arrival didn’t disturb his daily rituals even in the slightest. ‘Why did you say you knew who I was?’

Kestis looked up at her.

‘Sit down, young one.’ he said and motioned to the dock. Havre, however reluctantly, sat down next to the Jedi.

‘Why?’ she repeated. His eyes were half-closed, looking into the sunrise.

‘Why? Why do I ask you to sit down, or why as if what is my motive?’ he said slowly. Havre frowned, but the old man didn't seem to be bothered. ‘I offer help to those who seek it. And guidance for those who are lost. Right now, Havre, you look to me as if you are both helpless and lost.’ He turned his head towards her and studied her face. ‘I have never met anyone so withdrawn, yet so present. No less, a Sith.’

‘I am no Sith.’ she replied strongly, surprised by her own words. Kestis narrowed his eyes, now looking straight into hers.

‘What are you, then?’

Havre opened her mouth and closed it, surprised, suddenly feeling very vulnerable.

‘I… I don’t know.’ she answered simply.

‘Being aware of who we’re not is an important part of who we are.’ he said soothingly. ‘Tell me, young one, what do you know about the sides of the Force?’

‘Sides…?’ she repeated. Kestis sighed and frowned, pensive.

‘A great iniquity had been done to you.’ He said eventually. ‘Many had chosen the path that you had been led on, but to force another into it, that is much different…’ he muttered, as if to himself.

‘I don’t understand.’ Havre said, suddenly feeling anxious. She frowned and shook her head. ‘I don’t need you to tell me about any paths you think I am on, I came here for only one reason.’ she said strongly.

‘I cannot answer your question in a way that you want me to.’ he said, not even slightly stressed by her sudden reaction.

‘Then this is a waste of time.’ she said, standing up with irritation.

‘Havre.’ The Jedi stopped her, once she started to walk towards the cabin. ‘Whatever you want to be is none of my concern. I cannot force you to trust me, or anything I say. And I know you won’t believe me when I say this now, but I want to help you.’

‘I don’t want your help!’ Havre turned around with an exhale, clenching her fists. ‘I just need you to answer me!’

‘If you want answers, then you’ll need to learn to listen.’ he said, crossing his arms over his dingy poncho. ‘Patiently.’

Havre sighed and pursed her lips.

‘A ship will come in the next few days. It will take you wherever you want to go. But until then, you have literally nothing else better to do. And if you decide to listen, I promise you, you will know the answers you’re looking for.’

Havre looked at the Jedi. His face was focused, but calm. Slowly, her anger wore off and for some reason, she felt embarrassed by her outburst.

‘Or, you know… You can just fish. But I warn you, these waters are filled with Thornloops.’

Havre couldn’t help but snort a quick laugh.

‘I’d rather not do that.’

‘Good.’ the Jedi said, smiling. ‘I already caught a couple of big ones yesterday, so that would have been a waste of time anyway…’ Kestis stood up with a sigh. ‘I would like to show you something.’

'What is it?' she asked, but the man just quietly walked past her through the dock.

Havre followed him to one of the fisherman cabins next to the one she had been sleeping in. When Kestis opened the door and let her in, Havre opened her eyes wider, surprised by what was inside. The cabin was scrubbed clean, so the metallic walls reflected the light coming in from a small porthole on the ceiling. There was no portable furniture, like in the other cabin. It was empty, apart from a small copper ball that levitated mid-air under the ceiling, slowly rotating around its axis. When Havre got closer, she noticed carved out inscriptions on its surface, written in a foreign alphabet. She felt strangely drawn to it and had to stop herself from reaching her hand towards the strange item.

‘How do you feel?’ Kestis asked, curiously observing her face. Havre turned to him slowly, looking away from the ball. ‘If it’s calling you, you should take it.’

Havre unsurely looked back at the item. She knew she should suspect some kind of trap, but as like before she could feel the Force warning her about danger up ahead, now, she felt it reassuring her about her safety. She reached her hand towards the ball and as her fingers touched its surface, she felt that it was formed with powerful energy. The energy, however, didn’t show itself in a rapid shift, it didn’t overflow Havre, but it appeared to connect with her naturally, completing her existence. Havre took it in her hand and pulled it closer. And suddenly, the carved out inscriptions illuminated with a cold white light and the ball opened with a mechanism built like a vortex. Havre had to squint her eyes to look into the bright inside, which appeared to be filled with some kind of shiny sand.

Havre stood there, frozen, completely amazed by the beautiful artifact, feeling its embodied energy flowing through her veins, powerful and calm.

‘Remarkable…’ the Jedi muttered under his breath and walked closer to Havre. ‘I had to assume that you were the one who opened the temple on Jedha, but now I can be sure…’

When his words reached Havre, she suddenly was reminded of the visions she had on the first day she met him and an anxious feeling gripped her stomach. The energy from the artifact shivered and suddenly was interrupted by something darker… more familiar…Distant voices reached her ears, screams, and sounds of a fight… She felt their fear and then something else… But before she could sense it, the Jedi quickly jumped over to her and covered the sphere with his hands.

Havre let go and stumbled a couple of steps back. The Jedi closed the opening and the voices stopped. He put it back where it was levitating before and the energy slowly came back to its normal calming feeling.

‘Are you alright?’ He asked, turning to her with a concerned expression.

‘I’m fine...’ Havre muttered, shaking off the anxiety that had built up in her gut. ‘What… What was that…?’

‘This is an urn.’ The Jedi said slowly. ‘It’s carrying grounded kyber crystals of fallen Jedi padawans. Those were their voices that you’ve heard…On the day they had been slaughtered.’

‘Why did you want to show me this?’ Havre asked, a little outraged and confused.

‘I didn’t expect this to happen, but now that it did… I think I understand things more clearly…’ He said, again, as if to himself, looking pensively at the artifact.

‘What things?’ she asked and snapped him back to reality.

‘The nature of your position in the Force, Havre.’ He said and looked into her eyes. ‘This urn opens only for individuals connected to the light, that is, usually, for Jedi.’

‘But I’m not a Jedi.’ Havre frowned, stating this fact with disdain. Hearing it in her voice, Kestis tilted his head curiously.

‘What do you know of the Jedi?’ he asked.

‘They are force users manipulated by the Republic...’ she answered and Kestis raised his eyebrows with at most disbelief.

‘Huh.’ he let out, lightheartedly. ‘That’s a new term. A false one, if you ask me, although there was a time I could have agreed with it partially.’ he sighed. ‘But the Republic is gone and here I stand. So, no, the Jedi were not a form created by the Republic. The Jedi religion outlives the politics, as well as in the past and the future.’ the Jedi sat down on the floor and invited Havre to join him. ‘Tell me, young one.’ he said, when she sat in front of him. ‘Do you believe in what you had been told before? About the Force, the Jedi or Sith?’

Havre didn’t answer right away.

‘I… I’m not sure.’ she said finally.

‘You said you were not a Sith.’ He said calmly. ‘But I know you have been raised as one. I wonder what makes you feel that you’re not.’

‘I…’ Havre suddenly realized that it was the first time she would actually formulate everything that had been happening inside of her for the past five years. The secret, she kept hidden for so long and swore not to tell anyone… Somehow it felt right to reveal in front of this man. ‘When the Sith began our training on Korriban… For a long time, I thought I have been taught to become powerful… They told us that we had been brought there because we were chosen. I was just a kid, I believed them. I thought that all the pain that they put me through, every ritual, every punishment was supposed to make me stronger… That it all led to something greater… That I would once be free of that suffering, but… As time went on, I realized that I wasn’t being taught… I was being bred. To kill and destroy in someone else's name and cause that I had no belief in. The others… They gave in. Some were too weak, at one point they just broke and became hollow shells of people… They ended up as slaves in the temples… I remember them walking around like ghosts… With this horrifying emptiness inside of their eyes… Not knowing what their name was, who or where they were… Most of them were the few ones that once had some recollection of who they were before being brought to Korriban. The Temple Caretakers pretty quickly realized that those were the hardest ones to “set straight” and so, the easiest to break… Others seemed to be fueled by all of that… Sooner or later, they all started to turn into those… mindless pawns, driven by hate and hunger for power… They showed the same amount of cruelty towards the world, as they had been shown by the Caretakers… I think I was close to becoming just like them… I was scared of turning into one of those empty ghosts of kids hunting the temple. I thought there was no other way. That either I would be consumed by hatred, or I would be broken by fear. And somehow, stuck in between I survived all those years, before finally, the Descendants took me in, with five other kids from the temple. At first, I was happy… Anything was better than Korriban. They told us that our progress was monitored by Snoke and that one day, the best of us would be chosen to be his apprentice. This… fueled the others even more… At our first mission, they all acted so recklessly, trying to overpower each other, that they ended up setting the village on fire, almost blowing up our ship. And it was met with approval from our master. That was when I knew… I didn’t want to be a part of that anymore. It was all so mindless, based on nothing but rage and emotions. I resented them. But I knew that if I wanted to survive, I had to pretend. I imagined that someday, somehow, I could be free… Kadmûr could feel that I was… like he said… conflicted. And he knew the drill… Kill off the weak. I was fifteen. He tortured me regularly to, like he said… “Sharpen my motivation”. One day I felt him trying to get into my mind and somehow… I managed to close it off, repel him. From that day onwards it was all I focused on… Keeping my mind closed at all times and following orders to not show my resentment. And it worked. For a few years, I managed to hide behind the emotions of the other five of the siblings… But at one point I just… Had enough. I felt like a slave. I couldn’t bear spending any more years on Mustafar. And after six months of preparations, I knew that I was strong enough to escape. And I killed them. The five Descendants and Kadmûr. And I didn’t feel bad… at all. Although sometimes I did feel that way for a target I was sent to eliminate. And I never killed anyone I didn’t have to... But the Descendants weren't even people anymore… Consumed by hatred, hunger for power, and slaughter… Completely brainwashed… There was no hope for them. And I know they had a choice. At one point or another, we all had. We were all the same. They just chose to give in. And I didn’t...’ Havre fell silent. Saying all of that out loud made her feel extremely heavy at heart. She focused her eyes at one point on the floor. The Jedi must have resented her now.

‘You did what you thought you had to do.’ He said calmly. ‘I know what it’s like… Doing what you can to survive… But I was lucky enough to have people I could rely on at every point in my life. You had none… I’m very sorry.’ he said and put his hand on her shoulder. Havre twitched, not used to that kind of touch, but didn’t shake him off. ‘I truly am, Havre.’

When he said that, she felt something melting inside of her… nobody had ever treated her that way. She cleared her throat and just to pull herself together, she started talking:

‘When I was at Korriban, I had been taught that my Force sensitivity was a power of destruction. That, just like my saber it was a weapon. But it all changed when I escaped… The Force… or my relationship with it… It changed… I saw it as something else… I don’t know how to explain it…’

‘An energy between all living things?’ the Jedi asked with a shadow of a smile. Havre looked up at him with astonishment.

‘Yes…’ she muttered. ‘Can you feel that too…?’

‘Of course, I can.’ he said. ‘That is how everyone in the light sees it.’ met with her surprised expression, he elaborated: ‘You see, the Force is energy. With or without someone to wield it, it exists. Focused, you can see it in the living, in the dead, in movement and stillness, in happiness and sorrow. Between it all, there is a natural balance. And so there is light, and there is darkness. Equal, but opposite. Darkness, as you had experienced it, values power above all. Force users set on the path of the darkness see the Force as a weapon. A tool made to achieve their goals through violence, fear, naturally not only disregarding the value of balance, but destroying it in the process. That is the Sith way. The way that you had been brought up to believe it’s final. But as I said, there is also the light side of the Force. One that values peace, passiveness, and knowledge. It is the one that seeks and protects balance. The Jedi way. We are, primarily, peacekeepers. But it stretches out beyond war or fighting Sith. It is the way to find inner peace and balance.’

Havre listened to him talking, astonished. It was like every single gut feeling she had was formulated into words. It wasn’t even a matter of trusting that he was telling the truth, she already knew it was true.

‘You said you knew the nature of my position in all this…’ She whispered. The Jedi looked at her calmly.

‘All I can say is that I understand now how you exist in between the light and the dark. Your movements are at most instinctual. And I admire that, I truly do.’ he said. ‘There aren’t many people that make their way out of the dark, Havre. More frequently people, even though being brought up in it, turn away from the light…’ he said darkly, and Havre noticed a glimpse of sadness in his eyes. 'The darkness always seems to offer more, it's easier, quicker... but it never satisfies... it hungers you even more.'

‘I can’t see it as clear as you do…’ Havre said, shaking her head. ‘You see the darkness, the light… I just… I just see what’s in front of me… I never thought there was anything else.’

‘I understand.’ He said. ‘It’s natural. You didn’t have the means to see anything else with survival on your mind. But I cannot shape your purpose. That is up to the Force. All I can do for you is pass on my knowledge.’

‘You mean, to train me to become a Jedi?’ she asked, narrowing her eyes.

‘No.’ he stated. ‘I cannot  _ train you to become _ anything. That is up to you. But you are close to the light. So if there is anything I can do, it is to be your guidance in the way of the light side. And on your own, you can explore the potential you hold.’

Suddenly, Havre was reminded of the words that Ren had said to her… “ _ I saw what we are meant to be... what we are capable of… Havre, I saw the future.” _ and the vision… But if this really was the future, then what was she doing here…

‘In the end… Although I wish I could… I cannot make you stay on the path that I’m going to show you. The sides of the Force are not, and never were compelling.’

Havre fell quiet for a long moment, staring at the ground.

‘So you say, that what I have been feeling… that shift in the Force… is because I was turned to the light?’

‘How does it make you feel?’ he asked in response. She pondered on her answer for a moment.

‘Safe… peaceful… like it’s protecting me.’ she said in the end. ‘But it’s not like I can control it… Every single time I realized that something had changed it was like someone else was guiding me…’

‘The ways of the Force are mysterious, many had tried to understand it fully, but it took them years of meditations, and in the end, nobody can tell if they had found all the answers. It takes time and perspective to see how anyone’s destiny is carved out in the Universe, but what I have learned is that you can put your trust in the Force. And only in the Force.’ he paused for a second. ‘But from what you had been telling me I can see that it had reached out to you… and in a way that not many had been lucky enough to experience. You have a strong connection to it. And also to the light… You should never underestimate its importance.’

Havre looked up at the Jedi.

‘Then I want you to show me… The light side.’

Kestis looked at her with a calm expression.

‘You are already close to the light, I will guide you to see its full image. But for now…’ he sighed and stood up, reaching his hand to help her get up. ‘It’s time for dinner.’

‘I’m not hungry.’ Havre said, eager to start her learning.

‘Even I know that’s not true.’ Kestis scoffed and opened the door. ‘You should strengthen yourself before our first lesson. Come on, you’ll help me with the fish.’

‘Do you eat anything else besides fish?’ Havre asked, glancing one last time at the levitating ball.

‘Why would I?’ Kestis laughed and closed the door behind her. ‘It’s nourishing, fresh and there’s plenty of it here. Not to mention how good they are.’

‘I guess…’ Havre sighed. Kestis stepped onto the bridge and hunched down over its edge. He pulled a soaking wet braided basket out of the water. Inside, jumped around two, fat fish. The Jedi took one of them out and passed it to Havre. ‘Take this.’

She grabbed it with one hand, but its scales were too slimy and it jumped out of her hand onto the bridge. Havre quickly held it down with both her hands, securing its wobbling tail. Kestis snorted a quick laugh and pulled the other fish out of the basket, holding it firmly by the part just under the tail.

‘I see we have a lot to learn.’ He smiled subtly. 


	16. Pain of his vengeance

#  Pain of his vengeance 

* * *

_‘You want to kill me.’ Snoke’s voice echoed in the chamber._

_Kylo looked down at the ground, staring into his reflection. His jaw was clenched from the emotions he tried to hold in._

_‘My boy… You haven’t even finished your training yet.’_

_Snoke’s tone almost resembled somewhat a warm indulgence. He sounded just like when Kylo first heard him in his dreams when he was younger. But now, he could clearly make out the fakeness of it. There was no point in hiding his true intentions anymore._

_Snoke stood up and before Kylo could do anything, his master’s finger lit up with a flashing light, and once again, an overwhelming pain reaching into his core overpowered him._

_‘See?’ Snoke’s hateful expression illuminated with the cold light of his lightning. ‘You... Are... Still... Just… A... Child…’ Snoke drawled every word with poison and with every second as he spoke, the pain increased._

_Kylo thought he would get used to it, but after seven years of training under his master, the suffering never got lighter to bear. His face was paralyzed and his teeth were shut due to the contraction, but that didn’t prevent him from screaming. With eyes wide open, he stared at his master’s sadistic smile._

_‘How would you even raise a hand at me… Your emotions are wide open… I know everything you feel… I see every thought, every image that goes through your head… You can’t hide anything from me, don’t you understand?!’_

_He stared into his apprentice eyes with satisfaction watching how they slowly filled up with tears of pain, and at once let go, stumbling back onto the throne._

_The punishment was longer than usual and Kylo couldn’t get a hold of himself for a long moment. His muscles, all strained to the limit barely held him up, as he tried to stand up._

_‘Take him to the prison block.’ Snoke sighed and on a wave of his hands, two of the larger built praetorian guards walked onto the platform where Kylo tried to pick himself up. They grabbed his arms and shoved him onto his feet, tying his wrists with force-wielding cuffs._

_‘I think this time it won’t take long for you to rethink your actions…’ Snoke hissed, when the guards dragged his apprentice out of the room._

_Kylo felt them dragging his inert body through the halls, along the familiar way to the dreaded chamber, where they finally put him down._

_The praetorian guard pressed one of the buttons on the red-lit panel on the wall and with a mechanical clank, the contraption was pulled down from the ceiling. The other guard pulled Ren up to his knees and broke apart the cuffs on his wrists. Ren automatically reached out his hands towards the side of the mechanism, he had been there far too many times to know not to struggle. When the guards locked his arms onto the contraption, they stepped back and before leaving the cell, pressed in a combination on the control panel. With a familiar, buzzing sound, an electric plasma appeared in between his stretched-out arms, and the mechanism was pulled up, dragging him up until his feet were a meter up above the ground._

_Kylo felt the veins on his arms and legs fill up with electricity. The device was formed in a way to keep an inmate in a specific amount of pain, that would keep him conscious as long as he was locked inside, whilst still making him suffer from the electrical shock. A regular inmate put in this machine would have made it through for no more than three rotations, before a final internal body collapse. But Kylo Ren’s had been put through much worse to give out to it, making him able to suffer for weeks on end._

_Kylo rested his head down on his chin, trying not to breathe sharply, as every deeper breath meant another wave of pain in his lungs._

_Breathe in. Hold it in. Breathe out._

_Breathe in. How did he let himself do this? Hold it in. Breathe out._

_Breathe in. He was too weak. Hold it in. He is too weak alone. Breathe out._

_Breathe in. And now he was alone again. Hold it in. Now that she was gone. Breathe out._

_In such a state of desperation and suffering his mind automatically turned to the one single thing that gave him little comfort._

_Havre._


	17. Lesson One

#  Lesson One

* * *

Rotations on the water Planet of Flean passed quicker than what Havre was used to. To her surprise, once they had finished dinner and stepped outside to the dock, the two suns were already heading down to the horizon, allowing the millions of distant stars to shine brighter. 

‘The nights are beautiful here.’ Kestis said, breathing the fresh air zestfully through the nose. Havre sent him a glance. She had never met anybody that spoke like that - that is, expressing this kind of thoughts out loud. As a matter of fact, she had never met anyone even remotely similar to him.

Everything about Cal Kestis, from the way he talked and moved, to the energy that she felt around him, was different. There was something lightsome and airy about the way he was, as if his thoughts didn’t bring him down, although he must have been thinking a lot. Nothing in his manners gave off the dark weight that Kadmûr and Snoke carried with their presence, that though giving off the notion of knowledge, brought primarily an intimidating fear to the ones standing before them. Now, next to Cal, Havre recognized that she also carried a similar weight, that in comparison to the Jedi’s energy, was overwhelming. But it didn’t seem to put him off even in the slightest. 

‘Shall we begin?’ he asked, smiling, and somehow in those words, Havre heard the notion: “Shall we take this weight off?” 

‘Okay.’ 

They sat in the middle of the long dock, legs crossed. Cal reached into the inner pocket of his poncho and pulled out a black piece of wood that looked burnt to coal. He placed it on the dock in the space between them and waved his hand over it slowly. With the motion of the Jedi’s palm, the wood suddenly lit up with a flame and Havre jumped up, startled. But the piece of wood slowly rose a few centimeters off the dock and levitated in place, slowly turning, emitting gentle warmth. The dock seemed to be immune to the flames.

‘Alter.’ Kestis said in explanation. ‘A family of Jedi abilities that stands as evidence of the Force’s abilities to control the natural world. Like this eternal flame. You may have known the Force for its more… harmful nature, naturally, that was all they wanted to teach you.’

‘I think…’ Havre started, staring at the eternal flame with fascination. ‘I might have used it that way…’ and Havre told the Jedi about how she managed to escape the plant trap, deliberately leaving out the facts of why and with whom she was there in the first place.

‘Fascinating!’ Kestis let out on an exhale. ‘The Force seemed to be open to you more than I have assumed… Although it did come to you in a crisis and it tends to reach out to us in such situations no matter the age of the user… I’m curious how it would respond to you in a secure environment…’ Last few sentences Kestis seemed to mumble only to himself and Havre heard only every second word.

‘What do you mean?’ Havre asked impatiently. 

‘Sorry, I’ll explain. The Force user, such as you and me, is a vessel through which the Force transpires into the world. Although what we choose to do with this connection is our choice. Throughout a Jedi training, a Force-sensitive would normally learn the things you already managed to do not through experience, but from their master’s teachings. The Alter for example comes as the last piece of the Jedi Knight training, as it is one of the hardest Force abilities to master. Although, that does not mean a youngling wouldn’t be able to perform Alter abilities in a position of danger. Acting out of fear is one explanation for such incidents, though it would mean that the user taps into the dark side of the Force. The other way of using the abilities you do not know about is simply through relying on the Force completely, trusting it so deeply one abandons the idea of themself, allowing the Force to transcend through them on the outside world without the user’s actual control.’

Havre pondered for a moment. What the Jedi said made sense in her situation, now that she thought of it. The things she did… things that surprised her, now after his explanation, she realized came from her utter trust in the Force.

‘So you say I wouldn’t be able to control it otherwise?’ she asked. 

‘This may be the issue. Although I can’t be sure. Did you ever just try it out?’

‘Try out?’

‘Those abilities. For example the Alter senses. Did you ever use them outside of combat?’

Havre slowly shook her head “no”.

‘Try it then.’

‘What- now?’ Havre asked, baffled. ‘How?’

‘In any way you want. Don’t feel pressured, there is no shame in the way you used it before. In my opinion, it is by far the noblest way of connecting to the Force, although I assume that you would rather want to feel more in control of your abilities.’

Havre just nodded.

‘Okay then. Take your time. You don’t have to  _ prove _ anything. I just want to understand how you come about using the Force.’ he said and smiled reassuringly. Havre looked at him with hesitation and took a deep breath before closing her eyes. 

Tapping into the white void inside her head took her a little bit longer than usual, as she was a little bit intimidated by the Jedi's presence. After a moment of concentration, the outside world, and with it the Jedi’s image, slowly became muffled and at last, distant. Once cut off from the reality surrounding her, she took a moment to reflect. She could feel the reassuring energy of the Force flowing through her, as it did whenever she meditated before, but this time she had to use it and focus it on the present moment. Without opening her eyes, she slowly shifted her senses back onto reality, in a way that she saw it not through her eyes, but straight through the Force. That wasn’t anything unusual, she already used similar techniques before with no problem. But she had no idea what to do next. She looked around slowly, shifting her focus from one thing to another. The dark sky punctured by thousands of bright stars in the distance, the blue vastness of the ocean, its salty smell, the crackling sound and the warmth of the eternal fire in front of her, the damp wooden boards of the dock, the soft fabric of her robes, and finally the Jedi. She could almost see his energy now. It was bright, warm, calming. She felt subconsciously encouraged by it and when taking another, slow breath, she focused even sharper on the reality around her, now recognizing not just the mere shapes of it by also the patterns and structures they were made out of. The wind brushed against her skin and Havre felt drops of water hitting her cheek. And suddenly, the ocean wasn’t a reservoir, but an accumulation of singular droplets whirling around each other, forming each wave. She saw that through them, flowed the same Force… 

Havre opened her hands, allowing the drops of water to fall on them, feeling the force connecting her body to the vastness of the ocean. And when she gradually raised her hands, she felt the same energy moving through the water, as if it was an extension of her limbs. Steady and calm, but... powerful and pressing. 

‘Stars’ end!’ she heard the Jedi exclaim and she opened her eyes slowly. When she realized what was happening, her heart skipped a beat. 

The ocean around them had risen into the air in several vertical waves, flowing in circles around them in the form of a sphere. Havre raised her hands higher and more of the water rose in the air. And so, the higher she rose her hands, the quicker and bigger the sphere became. Their robes were brushed into the air and the eternal flame quavered in the powerful wind. Havre felt the energy of the water was now really intense, but still in her control. With eyes wide open, she watched as it flowed faster and faster with the strain of her muscles. 

‘Havre!’ the Jedi’s voice was drowned out by the sound of the splashing water. The sphere was now circulating so fast, that the droplets that tore out of it painfully hit their skin. ‘Havre, stop!’

The Jedi touched her arm and Havre twitched, coming back to reality, losing control of the water that came crashing down on them. 

‘Now, that was… something.’ Cal coughed out, wiping the hair off his face. They were both soaking wet.

‘I’m…’ Havre mumbled with embarrassment. The Jedi picked up the now put-out, burned-down piece of wood with a sigh and shook the water out of it. Havre looked away, angry with herself. The ocean around them was still a little rough. 

‘It’s okay.’ Cal said calmly, putting the wooden scrap back into the pocket of his poncho. ‘We all get a little carried away. The Living Force is powerful. Without proper knowledge and self-discipline is a danger even to the user.’ he stood up. ‘Let’s go inside before we freeze to death.’ 

Havre followed him back to the cabin. His words didn’t console her one bit. She still felt embarrassed that she lost control so quickly. 

Once she closed the cabin door behind her, Havre heard Cal mumble something, as he hunched over a wooden crate placed under the wall and pulled some kind of bundle out of it. 

‘Try it on, it should be your size.’ he said, handing it to her. Met with her surprised expression, he said: ‘Or do you want to parade in those wet ones.’

‘Thank you…’ she mumbled, taking the robes off his hands. Cal pulled the eternal-flame wood out of his poncho and handed it to her. 

‘I would like you to practice on this.’ he said. ‘With the greater power we are meant to hold in the Force, the stricter control we must place upon ourselves. This piece of wood is fragile, one mistake and it could turn into ash. Your lack of control soaked it in water, now your restrainment will dry it.’

Havre nodded, handling the wood with care.

‘Be patient with yourself.’ he said. ‘The Dark Side of the force tends to feed on the insecurities and frustration that we feel. It offers a quick solution, but it puts you out of control. The slower you take your steps, the more you will see of the things around you. Feel them, analyze them, consider their meanings. That is how you gain knowledge, and with it, you don’t have to rely on instincts anymore. I may be wrong about this, but…’ he paused for a moment. ‘The Force seemed to have placed you in a position of handling great strength in the Light…’ the last words he said very carefully.

‘I’m not…’ Havre said slowly. ‘I’m not strong… I never have been. Not even as the Descendant...’ 

‘Well, of course.’ The Jedi said lightly, as if he was stating a well-known fact. ‘Because your potential was never fully discovered back then. I’m not talking about the sense of strength as a Dark Side user might view it.’

‘I don’t understand… You keep talking about it as if I’m on some kind of… path…? Am I supposed to know what that is?’

‘All in good time, young one, all in good time.’ he said, smiling and placing his hand on the door. 

‘And when is that?’ she asked quickly. Cal looked back at her with one foot out the door. 

‘Tomorrow.’ 


	18. Nightmares

#  Nightmares

* * *

_ The concept of time was absent in the walls of his prison. He had no idea for how long his hands were locked in the torturous contraption. The pain, hunger, and exhaustion put him in a state in between dream and reality, the one where every subconscious thought transformed into almost tangible visions. _

_ And again, the haunting sound of distorted breathing filled his ears. Kylo slowly opened his eyes and through his hazy vision stared at the tall, dark silhouette in the corner of the room. _

_ ‘So weak…’ said Darth Vader. His voice was so loud, as if he was standing right over Kylo’s ear. ‘Not strong enough to follow my way.’  _

_ With a blink of Kylo’s eye, the image of his grandfather vanished, and instead of him, appeared another image.  _

_ ‘Our son was the one who killed Luke. There is no hope for him. This is why you had never loved him, because you always knew.’ his mother said, embracing his father. ‘That’s why you left.’ _

_ ‘I know.’ answered Han and looked at his son with at most disgusted expression. ‘Our son is dead.’ _

_ Kylo’s eyelids slowly fell over his tired eyes. The pain inside of him, caused not by the electrical shocks, prevailed. He couldn’t take it anymore. _

_ But even with his eyes closed, the voices didn’t stop.  _

_ ‘His heart is poisoned…’ _

_ ‘He isn’t human…’ _

_ ‘Is this what we fought for…?’ _

_ ‘Kylo Ren… The next Vader…’ _

_ ‘Ben Solo…’ _

_ ‘Ben!’ _

_ ‘Why would you spare his life if you knew...?’ _

_ ‘Ben! No!’ _

_ ‘Why didn’t you stop it when you had the chance?’ _

_ ‘You’re a murderer!’ _

_ ‘Now you will be who you are…’ _

_ ‘What is your name?’ _

_ He had heard those voices over and over in his ears over the years, but now he couldn’t even remember who they belonged to. They must have meant something to him once, but now, molded into one discordance of a scream all fueled the same emotion. Helplessness? Anger? Pain? There was no variety now. Everything felt the same. _


	19. The Seeing Stone

#  The Seeing Stone

* * *

Havre opened her eyes and looked at the piece of wood she soaked in water the day before, now completely dry. At first, the task was tougher than she thought it would be, but once she focused on clearing her head and tried to limit her input on the wood, it worked like a charm. She felt a sense of pleasant satisfaction with her work, one she hadn’t felt in a while. She thought that it was a long time since she was able to use her abilities to do something so harmless like drying wood.

The clothes that Cal had given Havre surprisingly fit her like a glove. The loose white undertunic, another layer of a sandy tunic with a matching obi, brown-ish tabards, and pants were made out of a rough and rather unpleasantly woven fabric, unlike the very comfortable leather belt that she put around it. It smelled of dust and wood, nowhere similar to the mass-produced robes of the First Order.

‘You look like a proper Jedi.’ Cal laughed, when she stepped out of her cabin in the morning. ‘Ready to start your training?’ he asked. 

‘No fish stew to keep me waiting?’ she asked, raising her brows and stretching her arms in the rough fabric of her new robes. 

‘Not today.’ Cal smirked, resting his hands on his hips. Havre only then noticed a long lightweight narrow boat moored to the dock next to him. Noticing her surprised glance, he added: ‘I’ll explain more once we’re on our way.’

‘On our way where?’ 

‘A seeing stone.’ 

‘Seeing stone?’

‘A naturally strong place in the Force. One of few in our Galaxy.’ He said, stepping into the boat. Havre followed his steps carefully, as the vessel trembled unstably on the water surface. The Jedi took a long, heavy wooden oar in his hand and once Havre sat on the bottom of the boat, with a quick blow of the Force, pushed the vessel away from the dock, setting the course for the open ocean. 

‘The ability you had presented yesterday is what the Jedi call the Living Force. It is the life energy around you and all the living things. It’s tangible, you can see and feel its effects on the outside world in many ways. Combat, jumping, force healing, moving objects, me now rowing this boat - those are all projections of the Living Force. The other, invisible to an untrained eye and in its sense more important is the Unifying Force. It is the power connecting us, the rippling surface of space and time, the mind and voice of the Force.’

‘The mind?’ Havre asked. 

‘Oh, yes.’ Cal said. ‘The Force does have a will. You were asking about the path you have in the Force, hopefully, you shall gain some answer from it today.’ 

Havre fell quiet for a moment and observed the ocean stretching to the horizon outside the broadside of the boat. She felt a little anxious. Now that she was so close to it, she felt unsure if she wanted to know her destiny at all, out of fear she had already seen it… and that image that until now she successfully pushed away in her mind, appeared again. Kylo Ren, Snoke’s head, the throne...

‘Don’t be afraid.’ Cal said softly. ‘The Force might seem clouded now, but the seeing stone is known for unfogging most aspects.’

Havre just nodded, but his words didn’t console her one bit.

They spent the next twenty minutes in silence. Cal gazed into the distance, working his arms on rowing and Havre looked nervously at the glazing surface of the water. She saw the reflection of her face, distorted by the short waves caused by the boat. And somehow it made her feel kind of strange, as if just then the reality had hit her. Was the person on the water surface the same one that once used to kill to survive? Killed… so many…

She looked up at Cal. His expression was calm, without a worry. Wasn’t he threatened by her? And why… Why was he helping her in the first place? She never opened her mind before him, not even once, so how could he know that whatever she told him about her was even true? That her intentions were pure? After all, she could have lied… And yet… she didn’t. For some reason she trusted him… why?

The boat hit a shallow ground and Havre was rapidly broken away from her thoughts. 

‘We’re here.’ Cal said and rested his arms onto the oar. Havre stood up carefully and turned around. 

Before them, a long, at least a hundred meters long sandback path emerged from the sea. It seemed to be built by nature, although it couldn’t be, because overlooking the sand path there was no other land visible in the distance. Havre couldn’t see the end of the path, as it disappeared in a cloud of white mist. She looked back at Cal questioningly.

‘You have to go alone.’ he said. Havre nodded slowly and carefully stepped out onto the sandback. Suddenly, she felt the same, strange shiver past her shoulders and she instantly looked back at the Jedi. 

‘ _ Tactus otium _ ’ he said. ‘Sense Force. The Force's way of revealing its presence to us. Places, things, or even people strong in the Force affect our senses, sometimes even tangibly. Some Jedi knew it by the name of the Force Calling or Ashla’s Hand.’ 

Havre looked back into the mist.

‘If it’s calling you, you should go.’ Cal said. Havre slowly took a first step towards the mist. ‘But Havre,’ Cal called her the last time. ‘One more thing before you go.’ he said in a serious voice, resting his hand on the oar and looking straight into her eyes. ‘The Unifying Force can show you many things, the past, the presence - the facts you’re searching for. But if you want to see the path before you, the future, I must warn you that nothing about it is ever final. The bad things, the good things, are all just visions, possibilities. It can guide you, obviously, but what matters are your actions and choices. Do you understand?’

‘I do.’ Havre said strongly. 

‘I will be waiting here.’ he said. Havre nodded her head goodbye and started walking down the sandback. 

The further Havre went, the stronger the Force Sense felt on her shoulders. But now it didn’t bother her as much as it did before. It was almost comforting. Once she passed halfway of the sandback, where the mist started to form, the sound of the water became quieter and after a few more steps, she couldn’t hear anything but her own sharp breath. Havre turned around, but she was no longer able to see the Jedi through the fog. When she turned back around, the mist before her started to thin out, and after a moment, the Seeing Stone emerged in front of her. 

It was a large, sharply cut boulder that stuck out of the sand unnaturally, although forming a perfectly flat level to sit on. Around the bottom of it on the sand laid four small, perfectly spherical rocks. Havre approached the stone slowly, feeling its energy entering her veins. It was a sensation different from what she had previously experienced. It didn’t feel quite light or dark, but the words “in-between” wouldn’t be accurate either. It was something beyond all of that, something bigger. 

As she got closer to it, she saw that the surface of the stone had been engraved in strange, unknown symbols all around. When her hand finally touched it, the shiver on her shoulders increased, as if it was urging her to go further. Leaning against her hands, Havre sat upon the stone and crossed her legs as if to meditate. And then, as she put her hands flat on the surface of the stone and closed her eyes, the sensation on her shoulders flooded the rest of her body and she became one with the Force of the stone.

Instantly, she was back in the white void. 

But this time, she saw something else. Her own self, as if she was someone else observing from a distance. 

She was sitting, legs crossed on the stone, surrounded by the pure nothingness of the void. And suddenly, a voice came from the direction from where she was observing herself:

‘Havre.’

‘Yes?’ She watched her own lips move, answering. 

‘Do you want me to show you?’ 

‘Yes…’ Havre whispered. ‘Please.’

And with her final word, Havre was back in her own body. She opened her eyes rapidly. She found herself in a room she had never seen before, but somehow it felt familiar. It looked like a chamber onboard some starship filled with cargo boxes. Suddenly, the door to the room opened and a tall, brown-haired woman came in. Her face reminded Havre of someone, but she couldn’t quite place it.

‘It will all be over soon, I promise.’ the woman said, leaning over Havre. Her eyes were filled with emotion so warm and loving, Havre felt it calming her down. ‘Stay here, don’t move. I’ll come to get you, okay?’ she leaned in and gently kissed Havre on the forehead. Havre wanted to say something to her, but she couldn’t speak. Quietly, she watched the woman exit the room.

Then suddenly, a familiar scene began. But this time, it was all clear. She was still sitting in the cargo chamber, when she heard a loud banging noise. 

‘They’re here! Run!’ a man’s voice yelled. Havre felt a familiar sensation of a dark presence and was paralyzed by her fear. 

‘Run!’ a man’s voice cried, followed by a sound of a lightsaber and then a collapsing body.

‘No! Taniel!’ The woman screamed.

‘Where is the child?’ a different voice asked. 

‘She’s not here.’ the woman answered. ‘You’ll never find her.’

‘Check the rooms.’

Loud footsteps approaching the chamber reached Havre’s ears. Then a sound of someone struggling.

‘Don’t try it!’ a voice said, and Havre heard the woman howl in pain. ‘The child is here. Keep searching!’

The door to the chamber opened and Havre saw a shadowy figure rise above her like a ghost. It picked her up off the ground and suddenly Havre’s vision was blinded by something dark.

‘NO! LEAVE HER ALONE! NO-’ A buzzing sound of a lightsaber silenced the woman’s scream. 

‘Take the child to the ship, quickly.’ 

‘Yes, Master.’

Havre opened her eyes to see she was back inside the white void. She touched her face. It was wet with tears still running down her cheeks. She felt her heart heavier than ever before and she had no idea how much it would hurt. But she couldn’t stop there. She needed to know. No matter how painful it would be.

‘Show me.’ she said with her voice trembling and closed her eyes again. ‘My future.’

A wave of cold wind brushed against her cheek and when she opened her eyes, she saw that she was now sitting on a cliff. Beneath her, stretched out an amazing view of a mountain valley, covered in fields of golden grass. On the right of her, cascaded a waterfall that fell into a vast, clear lake on the side of the valley. The wind dried her tears and suddenly, Havre felt very light at heart, balanced, calm. But there was something else. Another feeling, as if she was there to…

‘Havre…’ a familiar, echoing voice called and she quickly turned around. The valley was gone at once and she saw  _ him _ .

_ Everything felt the same. _

_ Although... something in the back of his mind was set somewhere else… Just one, small part of him focused on a different matter, as if it acted out of his consciousness. Kylo directed his mind to it slowly. Hope? It can’t be… Yes, he felt it on Jedha, but now it was supposed to be gone… but was it? Focusing on this one aspect somehow muffled the voices of the nightmares around him. What was that feeling… This gut feeling… And the longer he focused on it, the stronger it got, stronger than the helplessness, the pain, the anger… And suddenly, it urged him to open his eyes.  _

_ And he saw… her. Different from the one he used to see in the visions about their future. She looked the same as the day she had left him, standing in a sphere of white light that gleamed around her head in a halo. _

_ ‘Kylo.’ she spoke out and her words sounded as if through a muzzling barrier. She reached out her hand. _

_ ‘Havre…’ he answered. ‘Why did you do this… Why didn’t you just stay...’ _

_ She stayed silent. The image of her face brought out a strangely comforting feeling, as if just because she was there, he was safe. But the pain in his muscles reminded him that it was just an illusion. But was it just now, or was it never real…? _

_ ‘Please help me…’ _

‘Kylo!’ she yelled, but the man disappeared into the mist, and all she was left with, was the remnant of the feeling that appeared when she saw his eyes glazed with tears. Anxiety filled her stomach and she couldn’t take it anymore. The white void suddenly felt like a prison. 

_ ‘ _ Let me go!’ she said strongly and squeezed her eyes shut. 

The salty smell of the ocean filled her nostrils and she was brought back to reality. She was onboard the boat again, lying on its bottom. 

_ ‘ _ What- what happened?’ she mumbled out and slowly sat up. She pushed back something heavy that she was covered with, which turned out to be Cal’s poncho. He stopped rowing and looked at her with concern. 

_ ‘ _ Are you alright?’ he asked, leaning over to her.

‘N-no…’ she muttered. Whenever she had any kind of visions before, she couldn’t remember much beyond just scraps of strange voices, but now… she remembered everything clearly. Too clearly. ‘No, I’m not.’ 

‘You have to rest.’ Cal said, starting to row again.

‘No, I-’ she frowned frantically. ‘I can’t. I have to go-’

‘Havre.’ the Jedi said strongly and reached to touch her hand. ‘Do you remember what I told you about the visions?’

His calm and strong voice somewhat made her concentrate. She nodded.

‘The visions are just… possibilities…?’ she answered after a brief moment of silence.

‘Yes.’ Cal said. ‘Whatever the Force has shown you, Havre, it will take a greater meditation to uncover.’

_ ‘ _ Then what- Am I just supposed to ignore it?!’ 

_ ‘ _ That is not what I said.’

Havre shook her head with irritation.

‘I can’t meditate anymore.’ she said. ‘It’s just… too much.’

The Jedi looked down pensive. 

‘I understand.’ he said and let go of her hand. Havre looked away and Cal started to row again.

She couldn’t see her reflection on the water surface anymore, as the suns were already setting. She closed her eyes. She wouldn’t bear to look at herself anyway. 

When they docked back at the fisherman cabins, Havre walked into hers without a word. She could feel the Jedi’s gaze on her back, but he didn’t stop her. Once she shut the door of the cabin behind her, Havre leaned over it and slowly slid down to her knees. She was frustrated, angry, confused. She came to the planet with so many questions, but now, she felt like the more answers she got, the triple amount of new questions she would receive. And for what? For a sense of a clouded destiny? Opening of old wounds? Misleading visions?

‘Why does it all have to be so complicated…’ she whispered. For the first time, she resented the Force, blamed it for the suffering she was going through and the conflict inside of her… 

The pending question of  _ who she was  _ suddenly became an irritation. Havre got up and laid down on the bed, blocking her mind from the Force and pushing away the ache of the visions that she had been shown.


End file.
